Earlier this year, I had a shock to the system when my wife decided she wanted to sleep with other men, and then fell in love with a specific other man. There were a lot of enormously awful feelings that went along with that, the vast majority of which have been well-documented in previous threads.
I’d pretty well sworn off the idea of having feelings for anyone again. Didn’t seem possible, and it certainly wasn’t desirable. And so, when another Doper reached out to me to offer some support during a difficult time, the idea of finding anything more than a friend was the furthest thing from my mind. I was just looking for someone to vent to about my experiences – someone who had also learned recently what it was like to suddenly lose a spouse.
So we talked, and then we talked again, and we talked some more. And we found, much to both of our surprises, that we were enjoying each others’ company on the phone much more than we would have imagined. And, instead of getting sick of one another, that fondness grew and grew. As the holidays came nearer, and we knew we would both be facing the prospect of our first Christmases without our spouses, we thought that perhaps we’d do well to spend that time together and enjoy each others’ company in person. So we took a chance - we arranged to meet.
Over Christmas weekend, I sat in Las Vegas with jsgoddess next to me, having found more than I’d hoped (and probably bargained) for. The phrase “expect the unexpected” seems particularly apt. We had a wonderful time together. We don’t have any way of knowing where this relationship may ultimately lead, and there are a lot of potential obstacles in the way of making this work smoothly. But regardless of what the future holds, I’m grateful for having found her during this time in my life.
Here’s to starting over in 2010. Cheers!
