Absurd Reactions To Transvestites

[Defective_Detective]

[QUOTE=Excalibre]
That would be “her”, and if you think I’d leave someone with my hypothetical children without knowing anything beyond a person’s gender identification… <snip> What she keeps in her pants is totally irrelevant <snip>
[/QUOTE]

Excalibre, yes I am replying to your post, but this is not a personal stab at you. My post is directed at all who may read it, but I liked your post as a place to start.

First of all, if he has a penis, it’s a “him.” You can’t turn a tiger into a lamb by painting him white.

Second, you don’t let your kids hang around with a trans-person. Either they’re going to be scared and repulsed, or they’re going to think it’s cool to dress like that. Neither one of those things is good (unless you want your kids to be trans one day).

Third, and in general for this thread, I know I’m *not the only one * disgusted by the cross-dressers that I’ve seen. In most cases, it’s the ugliest thing I have seen in my life. You expect me to believe that is a woman? With stubble on her chin, wrists bigger than mine, and a voice like Barry White? With a nose like Mr. PotatoHead and a chin like Mr. Incredible? He was ugly as a man, so how does he expect to pass as a woman? It’s incredible. It’s gross.

I had one show up to my house one day, as a guest of a guest. I entertained him for ten minutes and offered him a drink. Then I quietly said it was time for them to go home. I don’t hate anybody, but I hate some *things * that people do, and I am sick and tired of everyone else trying to defend them and think that it’s normal. It isn’t normal, it never has been. Be compassionate for people, but don’t let your desire to be “politically correct” push you to accept absurd situations as “normal.”

[begbert2]

Okay, now I’m safe from getting piled on.

[Miller]

[QUOTE=erie774]
But it ispublic relations. When you are trying to get approval, do you want people to see you as reasonable or outrageous?
[/quote]

If all we wanted was approval from straight people, the smartest thing to do would be to stop having all that gay sex. That’s not really the point behind gay rights, though. What we want is the right to be who we are, to express ourselves how we want, and to not be attacked, beaten, imprisoned, or discriminated against because of that. Winning the right to be ourselves by pretending to be things we are not is self-defeating.

Maybe it is because I am a Chicago South Side white, middle-class, Catholic-raised, socially moderate heterosexual man (wow, those are a lot of labels!) but I think most outrageous or flamboyant fashions or styles are a little weird. Unless you are at a party or concert or appearing on stage somewhere, what is wrong with trying to look nice (read: conservative)? I go to work wearing business casual and my casual Friday clothes are jeans and a golf shirt. My weekend “slob” clothes are jeans and a T-shirt that either has nothing on it or maybe the name of the store. While I may see the humor in some T-shirt slogans, I see no point in wearing them, especially ones that children should not see.

There’s nothing wrong with that, if that’s what you like. If you don’t like dressing like that, then you shouldn’t be forced to. Your personal comfort zone does not define what is acceptable behavior for everyone around you.

If a person wears clothes normally reserved for a particular gender because of gender disparity, gender reassignment or sexual proclivity, I think they should want to look their best.

“Best” is a subjective term, though. Everyone wants to look their best, but everyone has a different idea of what looks good. The joke about Mimi from The Drew Carey show is that she was convinced she was a fantastic dresser. If you told her she should try to “look her best,” she’d have told you that’s what she was already doing.

My mother always told me to try to dress nice; clean clothes, neat hair, showered. Is that wrong?

Sorry, are you talking about fashion, or hygeine?

[Antinor01]

[QUOTE=Defective Detective]
Excalibre, yes I am replying to your post, but this is not a personal stab at you. My post is directed at all who may read it, but I liked your post as a place to start.

First of all, if he has a penis, it’s a “him.” You can’t turn a tiger into a lamb by painting him white…
[/QUOTE]

(post cut short)

All I can say is, you have a unique view with many faulty assumptions. This is certainly one of those situations where I can say with certainty that your username is very apt.

[Miller]

[QUOTE=Defective Detective]
First of all, if he has a penis, it’s a “him.” You can’t turn a tiger into a lamb by painting him white.
[/quote]

Why is the penis the deciding factor in sexuality? If you went away to war, and one of the bad guys shot your dick off, would you stop being a man? What about people who are born intersexed, with both male and female genitalia? Is someone born with a penis and ovaries automatically a man?

Second, you don’t let your kids hang around with a trans-person. Either they’re going to be scared and repulsed, or they’re going to think it’s cool to dress like that. Neither one of those things is good (unless you want your kids to be trans one day).

What’s wrong with thinking it’s cool to crossdress? Who is harmed by holding this idea? What negative outcomes can one expect if one is not repulsed by a man in a dress?

Oh, and no, they aren’t going to grow up to be transexuals. You’re either born transexual, or you aren’t. You can’t catch it like a common cold.

Third, and in general for this thread, I know I’m *not the only one * disgusted by the cross-dressers that I’ve seen.

That’s not exactly a revelation.

In most cases, it’s the ugliest thing I have seen in my life. You expect me to believe that is a woman? With stubble on her chin, wrists bigger than mine, and a voice like Barry White? With a nose like Mr. PotatoHead and a chin like Mr. Incredible? He was ugly as a man, so how does he expect to pass as a woman? It’s incredible. It’s gross.

“Most cases?” How do you know it’s “most cases?” For all you know, the vast majority of transgendered people look exactly like a “natural” woman. How would you know the difference?

And, anyway, so what? There are some butt-ugly women out there, too. Some people just ain’t that pretty, regardless of what gender they were born as, and what gender they present as. What difference does it make to you? It’s not like anyone is forcing you to sleep with them.

I had one show up to my house one day, as a guest of a guest. I entertained him for ten minutes and offered him a drink. Then I quietly said it was time for them to go home.

Why? How was she hurting you in anyway? What would it have cost you to treat her like any other woman, and be a respectful, considerate host?

I don’t hate anybody…

You do a poor job of showing that.

…but I hate some *things * that people do, and I am sick and tired of everyone else trying to defend them and think that it’s normal. It isn’t normal, it never has been. Be compassionate for people, but don’t let your desire to be “politically correct” push you to accept absurd situations as “normal.”

Again, why not? What’s wrong with considering transexuality and cross-dressing normal? What harm will it do to you as a person, or society as a whole?

[Defective_Detective]

Miller, of course they’re not going to grow up to be transsexuals. For clarity, I meant transvestites.

Most cases, yeah. I’ve met probably a dozen transvestites. They were all extremely repulsive - well, one of them was only mildly repulsive. I’ve never ever had anyone show me one that could pass for a woman, so what’s the point?

**Why would you dress like a woman if you can’t possibly pass for a woman? **

That is what bothers me the most, really, that’s the point I’m trying to make. There probably are some who could pass, but I’d be willing to bet it’s a minute minority.

And I had to invite my guest to leave because he was repulsive. Would you welcome someone in your house whom you find completely offensive to your senses? I don’t make it a habit.

[matt_mcl]

[QUOTE=Defective Detective]
**Why would you dress like a woman if you can’t possibly pass for a woman? **
[/quote]

Maybe for them, passing isn’t the point.

And I had to invite my guest to leave because he was repulsive. Would you welcome someone in your house whom you find completely offensive to your senses? I don’t make it a habit.

I don’t make a habit of excluding otherwise well-behaved people on the basis of their gender presentation.

[Johanna]

A word to the wise… DNFTT

[Miller]

[QUOTE=Defective Detective]
Miller, of course they’re not going to grow up to be transsexuals. For clarity, I meant transvestites.
[/quote]

That’s probably not going to happen, either. But if it does… so what?

Incidentally, what about letting our daughters hang out with transvestites? Is that going to make them grow up to wear women’s clothing, too?

Most cases, yeah. I’ve met probably a dozen transvestites. They were all extremely repulsive - well, one of them was only mildly repulsive. I’ve never ever had anyone show me one that could pass for a woman, so what’s the point?

How do you know? If you met a transvestite who could pass as a woman, how would you know it was a transvestite? He’d look just like a woman!

**Why would you dress like a woman if you can’t possibly pass for a woman? **

Because they like it? Do they need a better reason?

And I had to invite my guest to leave because he was repulsive. Would you welcome someone in your house whom you find completely offensive to your senses? I don’t make it a habit.

How do you mean, repulsive? Physically repulsive? Are you saying you don’t let ugly people in your house? That’s really astonishingly shallow, man.

If you meant morally repulsive, then no, I wouldn’t let someone I found morally repulsive into my house. But that begs the question, why do you find transvestites morally repulsive?

[Odesio]

Well, let’s be nice to Defective Detective, he’s obviously bothered greatly by this for whatever reason. To be fair, most of us have been conditioned to alter our behavior depending on which gender we’re socializing with and it can be uncomfortable when attempting to socialize with someone who bucks our gender expectations.

However, there’s no excuse for being rude. I can undertand why you might be uncomfortable, and that’s ok, but consider her point of view. Actually your example made it unclear whether this was a transexual individual or a transvestite (big difference) but either way you should be polite. Consider their point of view. Can you imagine how you’d feel if you spent the first 20-30 years of your life in a woman’s body even though you were a man? Can you imagine how heartbreaking it must be to be trying to live life as you should only to be excluded from social gatherings for not being feminine enough? I’d be devastated if someone were to say “You’re just not masculine enough, please leave”.

I hate to repeat myself and I hate even more to sound like a hippie but people deserve to be treated with respect, compassion, and understanding. Was I entirely comfortable when a friend who dropped off the face of the Earth reappeared as a she? Nope. I explained that my little mind just couldn’t wrap itself around the transition but I supported her decision to go through with the transition and I was still happy to call her a friend.

Just remember that we should treat others with respect. At least until they show you a good reason why they shouldn’t be treated with respect. Being different isn’t a good reason.

Marc

[Li_l_Pluck]

[QUOTE=Nawth Chucka]
Come on down/over! I know some people, they know people…people are known!
[/QUOTE]

Cool! Don’t be surprised if I contact you in advance of my next trip home. BTW, I’m not entirely ignorant of the scene in CHS–one of my cousins back home is also gay, and he’s told me a little, but I haven’t yet had the chance to go with him. So, yeah, not entirely ignorant, but definitely mostly.

[WhyNot]

[QUOTE=MGibson]
I hate to repeat myself and I hate even more to sound like a hippie but people deserve to be treated with respect, compassion, and understanding.
[/QUOTE]

Very well said (all of the post, not just this one line.)

I take it then that you also show hippies respect, compassion and understanding? More than this sentence would indicate?

WhyNot,
hippie chick

[Odesio]

[QUOTE=WhyNot]

I take it then that you also show hippies respect, compassion and understanding? More than this sentence would indicate?

[/QUOTE]

There are limits, man, there are limits. :dubious:

Marc