Another long distance relationship person chiming in… I agree with elfbabe completely… keep communicating… we too use phone cards and they are a godsend, as is the net and email and messenger programmes. Keep talking - set a schedule for when you talk, my bf and I have 2 times a day we talk, same time each day. If we can’t talk at those times, we email before hand to let the other one know. That way you;re not hanging round waiting for the phone to ring. At weekends obviously, it could be more flexible and you’ll probably get more time together. Most days, bf and I talk about an hour… on holidays or weekends, it might be more, maybe less (depending on whats going on).
Kalhoun I have to disagree with you on the “that you don’t just restrict yourselves to each other” - my LDR would not work out if either of us were dating outside of it. We discussed exclusivity at the very beginning and both agreed that it was vital for our relationship to work out. We trust each other totally in this and any other respect.
Visit as often as you can afford it - but don’t be rigid about your plans… real life has a way of butting in just when you don’t want it to and it can really mess things up. Discuss your joint priorities and make decisions together on what your plans should be. Something may come up that makes the visit unfeasible but might allow you to make a longer, less expensive visit in a months time. Given that it is expensive, this may work out to be a less stressful situation all round. What I’m saying is plan together, work together as a team.
Several people discussed honesty - be honest how you feel, if your mad, tell them, if your happy, tell them… whatever is going on, talk about. One of the wonderful things about an LDR is that you learn fantastic communication skills that will last a life time together.
Work together as a team as much as humanly possible - its not always possible but it can be done.
Also, to address the LDR’s don’t work out point? I don’t agree - I have 5 couple friends who are in long distance relationships - one couple are married, two are engaged, one couple are moving together by the Summer, I am still long distance as is one other couple I know.
LDR’s are hard and aren’t for everybody - but it teaches you a lot about yourself and your mate… its difficult and you can feel depressed about it at times but isn’t that true for all relationships? Yes I long to be with my bf but I know this waiting period is a time when we are building a very solid foundation to our relationship which can only serve us well in the future.
I firmly believe that fate brought him and I together and there is no way on this Earth that, now that I’ve found him, I’m ever gonna let him go!!!
Good luck with your relationship and feel free to give me a shout should you need any help.