Hmm, it seems the algorithm has stuck us in different worlds. I’ll trade you 2:1 for “The Smashing Machine” vs the “Bearskin” commercials I’ve been seeing. I don’t know what The Smashing Machine does, but it’s not clothes that I couldn’t care less about.
Stanley Steemer has taken an interesting left turn from their typical wholesome family image. The latest commercial has a ‘Harvey Keitel - Pulp Fiction’ or ‘Jonathon Banks - Breaking Bad’ style “cleaner”-- a sketchy dude who shows up at a house that a couple teenagers trashed and asks in a gruff monotone voice “how’d you get my number?” and “so what happened here?”.
Need to discreetly clean up a murder scene?
Call 1-800-STEEMER
(Never read about the film, just saw the trailer).
From the trailer, are we supposed to like the subject of the movie? He comes across as either a lovable doofus or a complete idiot. I never heard of the guy, but I like Mr Rock’s movies.
(eta did they digitize out Johnson’s tattoos, or just use tons of makeup?)
I’m getting tired of watching idiots pile seven pounds of messy food onto a paper plate and then use two fingers to hold it directly over their computer keyboard/kid’s art project/date’s lap/nuclear launch button/etc.
That spill was not the plate’s fault, you doofus.
The latest Corona commercial sets my Puerto Rican teeth on edge. “La playa means beach. Corona works just as well.”
OH MY FUCKING GOD, NO IT DOESN’T!!! Corona means crown. It works better for ‘virus’ than it does for ‘beach’. At least the virus looks like a crown.
That commercial amazes me in another way.
In this bright future we live in, does anybody still make cheap-ass paper plates that can’t hold a lone hotdog without folding? Better, more rigid Chinet plates came out in the 70s(?). Isn’t the technology mature enough that all plates are made that way? Why make crappy plates any more?
Yes, they still make them. And people/businesses still buy them - sometimes precisely because they fold. There are plenty of reasons not to use those cheap , uncoated white paper plates - but the thicker, sturdier plates won’t work to put my two slices of pizza in a bag.
Anyone who does that deserves what they get.
Speaking of piling-on too much food - pet food commercials always show a bowl brimming with the product - a Chihuahua is presented with a bowl of food the size of Texas. If they are advertising to pet owners, they probably know you should not put that much food in front of your pet (for a medium-size dog it’s around one cup 2x a day). But yeah, a bowl with the correct amount would not look as good in film.
I prefer to buy the cheap paper plates, but I use them with plastic holders so they don’t collapse under the weight of the sandwich/pizza slice/whatever. And even then, I don’t use them for anything heavy or messy.
Thank you Mr. Steemer.
The house looks great, but their clothes are still heavily stained. 
Campbell’s Soup has continued the tradition of portraying fathers as incapable of even the basic task of feeding their children without mommy’s help:
Ha, “You got this! XOX Mom”.
You CAN make mac & cheese! Just boil some macaroni, dump Campbell’s cheese soup over it, and bake it a little so it seems fancier.
Dad: Kids, I got a job for you…
A new Verizon commercial that’s getting a lot of airplay is all kinds of wrong. It took like 4 or 5 viewings of it before I even realized it was a Verizon commercial, because I had to get past
WTF HIS MOUTH IS ON HIS CHEST AND THERE IS BLANK SKIN WHERE HIS MOUTH SHOULD BE WHAT LOVECRAFTIAN HORROR IS THIS
I am pretty sensitive to the “useless Dad” meme, but that Campbells commercials is NOT triggering me - the note appears to be for the family, not specifically Dad, and everyone is shown pitching in to make the food. I’ll put this one in the “Dad shown in a good light” column. There are many, much worse “worthless Dad/man” representations out there.
Holy Hell - what were they thinking??
I think the changing room one is he’s just hanging out … and eating.
There’s an annoying Bayer commercial. It’s shot in a grainy monotone and looks like a cross between Mr. Bean and the Outer Limits. The main character is a bewildered schlub in a raincoat, surrounded by a cityscape in which everyone covers their eyes and walk into each other. I know the classical piece that they play, can’t name it for the life of me.
That mouth one [edit! no joy on 2 searches of “teeth” and “mouth”] Delves MASSIVELY into the Uncanny Valley, and I have to change channels whenever it comes on it is so unnerving.
There’s an annoying commercial for some brand of insurance I keep seeing: A guy sitting at a big boardroom table in a company meeting sees that his boss has a coffee cup with a cartoon image of a Bulldog mascot for some college sports team. He points to the mug and says ‘go dawgs!’, to which his boss gives a very curt, dismissive “uh, yah” and pointedly turns the cup around so the mascot is no longer showing. Undaunted in his utter failure to read a room, he does this loud, obnoxious “Bulldog Bark” (ROWF ROWF ROWF!!), not once, but twice.
Later, back at his cube, while being ridiculed by his colleagues (“hey, bark boy”) he says something like “yeah, I screwed up, but at least I saved on my insurance!”
A couple notes to the people who created this ad gem:
- If your commercial is so annoying that I’m mentally tuning it out to the point I don’t remember the exact product, maybe you’re doing something wrong.
- A fictional character selling your product should seem relatable, not punch-in-the-faceable. Maybe they thought he was relatable (hey, I do dumb stuff at work too!), but to me he was such a clueless annoying moron, that if I ever do happen to notice which insurance it is, I will make a point to not ever get it (or cancel it if I already have it
).
I don’t remember which company the commercial is for, either,* but their entire current campaign features clueless morons with varying degrees of being annoying.
*A quick Google says Allstate.
There’s a cheap insurance ad that’s running near me. A middle-aged guy in jeans, black turtleneck, and a headset microphone. walks onto a stage, and they show some generic audience, as if a whole crowd would want to listen to this guy. His spiel is probably tailored to where the ad runs. I suppose some dum fuks will take him seriously because of the Jobs/ Elizabeth Holmes turtleneck.
Correction - clueless male morons. I don’t remember whose ad this is, either, but two other irritating ones have a dufus stealing cotton candy from some kid in the stands of a game, and another dope accidentally letting a longhorned bull out of his pen. I am not entirely sure what point they are trying to make here, either, but their commercials are memorable for the wrong reasons.