Homer: “Oh, great…Mormons.”
Kang: “Actually, we are quantum presbyterians.”
To somebody not especially familiar with Kang and Kodos (they’re the two one-eyed aliens, right?), this thread is truly surreal.
If you wanted to make Serak the Preparer cry, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
“To pronounce it corectly, I would have to rip out your tongue.”
giggles insanely
unfortunatly all the quotes I know have been used so I can’t contribute. 
My 2nd favorite characters, Capt. McAllister being my favorite:
“I am CLIN-TON. As overlord, you will all kneel before me and obey my brutal commands. End communication.”
“It doesn’t matter which one of us you vote for. Either way, your planet is doomed. DOOOOOOOMED.”
“The politics of failure have failed! We need to make them work again! Tomorrow, when you are sealed in the voting cubicle, vote for me, Senator KA—Bob Dole.”
“I too am looking forward to an orderly election tomorrow, which will eliminate the need for a violent bloodbath.”
Yup, none other. LOL, i’m getting giggly just thinking about how this thread must appear to people who have never even heard of “The Simpsons.”
It’s the same for me whenever I wander into a Monty Python thread…
Wait, there appears to be more space dust on the book.
HOW TO COOK FOR HUMANS
HOW TO COOK FORTY HUMANS
HOW TO COOK FOR FORTY HUMANS
You thought we were going to eat you?
GOOD GOD
“Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons!”
Kang or Kodos: It seems the earthlings won.
Kang or Kodos: Did they? That board with a nail in it may have defeated us. But the humans won’t stop there. They’ll make bigger boards and bigger nails, and soon, they will make a board with a nail so big, it will destroy them all!!
[then both laugh evilly for a long while]
Kang is my co-pilot.
Flanders: “First thing I’m going to do is wish away those pesky aliens.”
Not exactly a K&K line, but it is about them so it kinda qualifies.
"To put you at ease, we have recreated the most common spawning locations of your species. You may choose either the back seat of a Camaro, an airplace bathroom, a friend’s wedding, or an alley behind a porno theatre. "
KENT BROCKMAN:
Well, a refreshingly frank answer from Senator Dole…
It is 100% impossible to read these lines in anything other than the Kang and Kodos voice.
(Woman in Jerry Springer crowd wearing a poodle sweater)
“If yer the father where you been at?”
“Anyone from a species that has mastered intergalactic travel raise your hand.”