Sorry Sattua I had 3 before we finally conceived Ethan, each time was heartbreaking.
Ethan was 9 weeks old on Friday. He celebrated by saying “tummy time is for losers!” and rolling over. He is a happy, smiling, cooing baby. He also sleeps 8-3 and 4-6 every night and is a perfect baby. He’s tiny, barely 10 lbs and loves when I sing the Wheels on the Bus. The first 2-3 weeks were awful and I had a terrible case of the baby blues. It’s ironic that now that he’s so much easier and so much more fun, i go back to work tomorrow.
Yeah, one reason I’d really like to have another baby is so that I can have a do-over of the first 2-3 weeks. They were awful for us, too. The shock of having your worldview reoriented, c-section recovery, breastfeeding failure, sleeplessness, and the nastiest we’ve ever been to each other as a result. I’d really like to do it again and know what I’m doing, and have a sense of perspective about it.
On the plus side, one facet of my baby blues manifested itself as being incredibly weepy and grateful for my husband, we managed to stay on a pretty even keel with each other, at least.
So…finally crawling and her first word on the same day. Her father and I, the dog, every toy, the view out the window, and pretty much every object in her field of view has been “Bob” since Christmas. (None of us are Bob)But suddenly her bathtub fish has a name: and it’s a very clear but very damp “Fishhh”. So that’s awesome.
Of course I’m awake at 1:43am because she is, so we’re still stuck on waking up several times each night. That’s getting old. As is the dictator style leadership of my boobs. Eating solid food three or four times per day and doing really well, but commandeers my breasts with toothy, scrapey, sharp insistence several times each day and night, too. I’d like less of that.
Troppus, our experience with the nighttime waking was that we all hit a point where enough was enough more or less simultaneously. You’ll know when you’re there… and it sounds like you’re getting close.
For us, we got rid of pacifiers, got rid of bottles, and stopped using the monitor within the space of a month when she was 14-15 months. Went from 2 nighttime wakeups to 0. Bliss. She missed the pacifier but we got her attached to a dollie instead pretty fast.
She’s in my room because the screaming heat pump is so loud I can’t hear her when she wakes, and I don’t have a monitor and she’s never used a pacifier. She’s weaning herself and my production apparently isn’t keeping up with her needs. I’ve tried filling her up with solid food before bed: no change. I was planning on trying a bottle tonight, why did you stop giving yours a bottle? I’ll definitely try a doll.
My daughter was drinking from a cup during the day and ONLY using the bottle at naptime, bedtime, and a 4am feeding by then. I was sick of washing and preparing bottles, and also sick of getting up at 4am… and I felt confident that nutritionally she didn’t need that early morning bottle anymore. So the bottle went away, a sippy cup of water and a dollie went in her crib instead. I think she woke up at 4am for two more mornings, and both times I got up, guided her hand to the cup, and went back to bed. And then the wakings stopped.
She replaced the bedtime bottle-sucking with bedtime cup-sucking for a long time, which was fine with me. She still sucks on her cup as soon as I put her in the crib when she isn’t feeling well.
My daughter turned 19 months on Sunday and still isn’t walking unaided. She shuffles around on her backside, and will happily stand at the sofa or a table for long periods of time, but she can’t quite pull herself upright yet. She has her first shoes, though, and will walk down to the end of the road and back if I’m holding her hands.
What she lacks on the walking front she is more than making up for with talking, though. It seems like she’s picking up a dozen new words every week at the moment. “Oh no!” is the current favourite phrase, as in when we’re trying to get her dressed to go out. “Oh no, coat!”
Well, we’re nervous here. My 12-week scan is on Thursday. We haven’t told anyone in the family yet, because there’s so many medical problems on each side of the family that we want the Nuchal Translucency done first. But if all goes well, we’re telling this weekend.
It’s our first and I’m in a foreign country. My doc speaks English, but my medical French to talk to anyone else at the practice or hospital is just about non-existant. I don’t know if I get my doc for the delivery or whomever happens to be on. Ante-natal groups? Sure, if I was fluent in the language. Couple that with the fact that some creepy things went on at our local hospital during WWII and I am less than the very happiest camper at the jamboree.
I’m actually a little terrified and wishing I was back in the UK.
Saw a cute cartoon on Facebook the other day. It’s a good description of how parenting changes as parents get more comfortable and less frightened:
“When my first child ate dirt, I called the doctor. When the second child ate dirt, I cleaned out his mouth. When the third child ate dirt, I wondered whether I needed to give him lunch.”
It might require a somewhat expanded definition of sanity, but yes, it is possible.
Sattua, my heart goes out to you. For what it’s worth, we had two of those before successfully conceiving our second, and after that point, the pregnancies have all been fine, so don’t lose hope.
Congrats! And check out the net and see if there are any English Language mother support groups where you are. I would help, but I am sure you don’t want some anonymous internet stranger knowing where you live
My little one will be eight weeks tomorrow. Things are slowly getting easier. I finally finished with college so I’ll be a stay at home dad until I can find a job once my wife goes back to work.
She amazes me every day. I love to watch her slowly develop. She smiles when I make kissy faces at her and tries to mimic. In fact, she’s always trying to mimic the sounds we make to her. I’m shocked that they start doing that so young. I wasn’t expecting that for another seven months or so (because I assumed babies don’t start that for a long while).
Awwww. When my daughter was two and three months old she would go “ooohhhhhhh” back at us–cutest thing ever. She and her daddy had some really great chanting sessions. Then she stopped cold turkey and didn’t imitate again until she was over a year old. At that point it was animal sounds for a long time, then finally words.
She turned two a couple of weeks ago and is speaking in full sentences, which came on suddenly and weirds us out.
My 16 month old is being a bit of a pill lately. She has officially figured out that she can tell us no (not verbally yet, but vigorous shaking of her head) and thinks defiance is kind of funny. Mommy says not to do something? Well then obviously she should do it and laugh uproariously and then scream through her time out in the other room.
I’d like to hear how folks handled the first few weeks–we brought our little girl home yesterday and, of course, everyone we encounter has an opinion. My two big ones are:
Did you feed your newborn on demand or wake him/her every 2-3 hours to eat?
What did you have your newborn sleep in? In hospital, they kept her in a diaper and then simply bundled her in two light blankets? My MIL thinks she’s cold all the time.
I nursed, so on demand, but my friend the ob/gyn nurse feels that all newborns should be fed on demand and cuddled and soothed on demand as well. The old school “put them on a schedule, let them cry, don’t spoil the child” goes against nature IMHO, and hampers the extra boost you both need from oxytocin and all the other feel good, bonding hormones. Follow your instincts, * you’re* the mother and you have a window in which to form a bond with your child. Do whatever it takes to ensure you do that for each other.
I dressed mine in long-sleeved, footed pajamas and put a thin cotton hat for trips to cooler locations.
Congratulations! I found the best advice and support here, I’m sure you will, too.
Oh, and my girl was writing from the get go and fought the swaddled. Blankets were not an option unless I was holding her because she’d pull them over her face. I didn’t feel comfortable with that, so long sleeved pajamas and the occasional hat were my alternative to a loose blanket.
I had 3 before we finally conceived Ethan, each time was heartbreaking.
