I’ve been divorced for 11 years. My ex is a decent guy, and we get along fairly well–he pays his support on time, gets the kids (my two oldest) every other weekend, etc.
He doesn’t, however, ever participate in anything the kids do, such as school events. I used to invite him and his wife to such things, but it became apparent that he felt I was “bugging” him, so I stopped.
Anyway, he, his wife, and the kids go camping every year over the Memorial Day weekend. This year, however, my oldest son has a jazz concert on the 24th. He’s playing a solo, even! Having just started on trombone this year (he’s a tuba player at heart), this is a major, big deal.
I had mentioned this to my ex beforehand, but he thought they would be leaving on Saturday, so no problem there. Then, when I called to tell them when the concert was, he announced that they would be leaving on Friday afternoon. Which means, naturally, that my son would miss his concert.
Now, I rarely kick up a fuss with my ex, and I really do NOT want to be a b*tch, but I’m NOT putting my son in a position where he has to choose. He’s nearly 16, he loves his dad, and I don’t want him feeling guilty. So I’m willing to take the heat and Just Say No, he can’t miss his concert. Period. I’ll offer to drive him halfway (it’s about a 4 hour trip) to the campground on Saturday, if someone can meet me. That way he won’t miss his weekend, or his concert.
His dad is not going to go for this, I’m afraid. (I haven’t talked to him yet as he’s gone for the weekend.) But I’m feeling pretty firm about this.
Am I wrong?