Does that constitute an apology on his planet?
I think you’ve dodged a bullet here. This guy is wrong for so many reasons.
I don’t think you were overreacting, either. But, I am stunned to hear you admit you liked a man! 
The t-shirt to prove it! Bahahahaha! Haaa, I needed that laugh, Missy. Glad to see I’m not the only one who thinks he’s an assmonkey and am not overreacting by giving him the proverbial “F U.” Oh well, back to the drawing board.
Heh, Marley sez his words of advice rhyme with “Rump bim.” Dump him, silly Seige.
Very funny, Davebear. Well now I hate him, so everything’s back to normal. 
First strike - the judgemental, insulting behaviour. I agree with everyone else here - he was way out of line.
Second strike - pestering you when you are obviously not very into it. Borderline stalker behaviour.
Third strike - telling you to just get over your unhappiness with his out-of-line behaviour.
Actually, after a first strike like that, you probably don’t need any more strikes. But it sounds like you knew that.
He was out of line. Hell, I’ve had a drink or so in front of various recovering alcoholics before and none of them said a word – except for the Canadians who insisted that I HAD to get SOMETHING because I was 20 and visiting Ottawa and so was legal. Just because they don’t comprehend the concept of having a drink or so, and not drinking to get blind stinking drunk, doesn’t mean they get on my case about it. I enjoy an occasional glass of wine or something and, as in the case of yesterday, if I’m at a brunch where they offer champagne I sure as hell am going to have a glass.
He was way too judgemental and out of line.
As several posters have stated, he probably has a background that includes alcoholism somewhere. We (people with such a background…I have a list of alcoholics/drug addicts in my family tree) are overly cautious about getting involved with people that fit the stereotypes.
That being said, one instance of you drinking alone while talking to him on the phone is not indicative of alcoholism. He overreacted and said some very stupid things.
You did the right thing. Maybe you should email him back and tell him to find a support group.
~J
Just another “he’s an asshole” vote, MeanOldLady. I also really, really want to second Missy and then have her sentiment tatooed on my ass. I was in a serious relationship with someone who consistently brushed off my feelings with “You’re too sensitive!” Any reaction to any situation or comment that wasn’t HIS reaction was too sensitive, and that’s why I finally dumped him.
I also want to comment on what other posters are saying about him perhaps coming from a family of alcoholics. I come from a long, distinguished line of drinkers who drank themselves to death, so I feel qualified to put my two cents in. When I was 16, my best friend at the time fell in with some wild kids who (gasp!) drank a lot at parties and smoked pot. I was outraged, gave her long speeches on the perils of alcoholism, and basically ruined the relationship completely. Six years later, I would never in a million years do the same thing, and I honestly can’t believe I reacted the way I did back then. I’m mature enough now to realize that people make their own choices and deal with the consequences just like I do and that I have no, absolutely NO right to judge others or be rude to them because they have made different choices from me. What I’m trying to say is that this guy has the added bonus of being seriously juvenile, and that this is completely his problem and has nothing to do with you or your drinking habits.
Be glad you kicked his ass to the curb, darling, and be grateful that you found out now instead of later. {{MeanOldLady}}
And FWIW (sorry if someone mentioned this, I scanned the thread and didn’t see it), regular cigarettes are in fact slightly mood-altering. They produce serious neurochemical feedback, bumping up serotonin levels - I think I’m remembering this right - which produce an internal reward similar to after you’ve eaten, had sex, etc. This is why they’re so addicting, you get rewarded like you’re fulfilling innate biological drives. Plus people often smoke them when they’re nervous, to calm down and feel better. Cigarettes don’t cause “impairment” if you smoke a lot at once, but one regular drink won’t impair most folks either, and you certainly weren’t bingeing.
Get out while the getting’s good! This guy sounds like my last relationship and believe me he’ll have “issues” with everything while placing the blame on you.
'Kay, so I’m done with him, but I guess this is bothering me so much because I liked him. I know liking someone doesn’t seem like that big of a deal, but it is for me. There’s truth in Davebear’s mocking. I don’t really like anyone. Usually I go out with someone, he’s okay, so I keep seeing him. If he starts acting like an assmonkey, it’s not that big of a deal. I just dump him and move on. Occasionally, he’ll get under my skin, but I’m over it quickly. It’s not hurtful, just annoying. Even the guys who didn’t end up pissing me off never evoke any real emotion out of me. I’ve dated guys for long periods of time and have never gotten that smushy I-like-you mixed with I-really-want-this-to-work feeling. I got that with him for the first time … hmm … in a long damn time. I wanted this to go somewhere but it’s not gonna. sigh
Some people just have weird triggers. Having absorbed numerous lectures in my youth from Qadgop and Mrs. Mercotan on The Dangers Of Addiction, (hi Dad! They were good lectures…) I was pretty freaked out about everything for a long time. I remember having a panic attack when a now ex-boyfriend had a beer in his hotel room with some friends while they were on a trip. (he was in high school at the time) But the last few years have given me a more reasonable outlook on things, to the point where I can laugh at things like the seemingly endless stream of people offering my boyfriend pretty much every illegal drug known to man. (ahh, the metal scene…)
Still. He acted way beyond what can even be excused by having personal issues with alcohol use.
No you’re not overreacting. Kick him to the curb! Next!
Don’t listen to me. I’m at home alone and just popped a top. Well, not really alone. My pets are with me. And those voices in my head…
Cheers!
Ohhhkay! I think I need to play devil’s advocate here, simply because nobody else does and I don’t like to argue in the favour of the majority anyway 
I do agree that he overreacted when he was complaining about you drinking alcohol - from my experience I’d say that women rarely overdo alcohol consumption the way men do, so it’s all good if a woman drinks a bit in my book.
However, you were drunk at that moment and that’s never a good starting point to make decisions. I had a bitter quarrel with a friend of mine when I was drunk and left in anger. The next day he came to me, talked to me and apologized and it was all good.
The way you describe things, you never even gave him the chance to talk to you, so perhaps you are a bit too quick about it?
Besides, perhaps alcohol wasn’t even the issue here. Perhaps he just wanted to see how far he can go and whether he can manipulate you and send you on a guilt trip. It was the right thing to show him the borders right then, but still I’d vote for at least hearing his side of the story again, preferably when you are sober.
One quarrel and you go from love to hate - that’s pretty drastic, imho.
I think you’ve been given some great and true advice here on this thread.
These are pretty large red flags, IMHO. Manipulative and controlling, if you stick around listening to this guy’s ‘advice’ you’ll be ground down till you can’t even spell self-esteem, never mind own it.
I’d definitely release this one back to the universe, honey. You’ve had a narrow escape.
I don’t think that’s what it is. I’m a recovering person and wouldn’t feel comfortable dating a woman who drinks. But I would acknowledge that as MY problem and no reflection on her. I certainly would not lose respect for someone who takes a drink.
You know the sad, pathetic thing about all this? Chances are that he’s adding you to his list of out-of-control drinkers, friendships with whom have been destroyed by solo drinking…
what a maroon.
Oh, and Marley? I thought you meant “hump him,” which didn’t make any sense at all…
Optihut, I don’t think she was drunk - it sounded like she was having a rum and coke, not multiple rum and cokes. How about it, MeanOldLady? Were you plastered?
Well I wasn’t drunk at the beginning of the conversation. By the time we got off the phone I was feeling a wee bit tipsy. Not “plastered” though. I did give him a chance to talk, but he was not making with an apology. In fact, he told me to “get over it.” Feh to him. FEH!