Am I really that bad of a person?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

I don’t know if it changes from state to state, but as far as I know, marijuana possession is a misdemeanor unless you have enough of it on-hand to bump the charge up to intent to distribute. (I’ve no idea how much you have to have to qualify for that.) That’s still bad enough though.

I have to admit that I do tend to think less of those who partake, even recreationally and even if they can handle it just fine. I think I distinguish it from alcohol by way of the idea that alcohol is (properly) indulged in recreationally because people like the taste. Me, I’m not a drinker, but I do like a good beer once in a while, or maybe some sort of mixed drink, but never enough to even give me much of a buzz. Dope on the other hand is indulged in pretty well explicitly for the buzz. I tend not to like to deal with people who are buzzed – or for that matter, drunk, because I feel like I’m not interacting with that person. Rather, I’m interacting with that person in an altered state of mind. It’s not the “real” them, but a chemically altered them, and I’d much rather spend time with who they really are, not who they are on alcohol or drugs. It’s one thing spending time with someone over a few social drinks, for example, but another if they get blitzed. Pot on the other hand has no social value to me in that context; you don’t get together with someone for a nice chat over a snack and a couple of blunts.

Now I’m perfectly willing to accept that maybe my view is a little skewed. I’m pretty anti-drug, save for the legal ones, and even alcohol I advocate only in moderation. A few beers here and there? Cool. A six pack a day? That’s pushing it. Pot? No thanks, come back when you’ve come down.

Yes, perhaps it’s a little prejudiced, but I just don’t see the benefit of pot. (Nor hard drugs, but I’m completely and totally against those and I think most people will agree that they’re bad news anyway.) It gets you high, that’s pretty much its sole purpose, and if you want to spend that much time being high, then it makes me wonder what it is about your life that you want to distance yourself from.

I think also it is the fact that I just prefer going through life with a clear and level head, and can’t really understand why someone else wouldn’t. It just strikes me as being a bit dishonest to yourself and to others; you’re living (parts of) your life in a state that precludes, at least to some degree, wholly rational, clear thought, and that sort of thing is anathema to me. Interacting with others while high also strikes me as a bit dishonest because you’re not precisely yourself.

I don’t know if I’m making any sense here, it’s all sort of stream-of-consciousness, but that’s generally how I feel about it. None of it makes you a bad person at all – don’t get me wrong. I’m sure you’re a very good person and I applaud anyone who strives to live their life well. Would that there were more people with the same ambitions. But it just seems like if I’m trying to get to know someone who themselves are high, to whatever degree, then I’m not really getting to know them in their entirety, just a chemically altered version of them. That version may not differ a great deal depending on how the person handles their weed, but I still can’t shake the feeling that they’re just not quite present and accounted for.

22

I think the pastor was just pissed that you were obviously high, yet didn’t offer him a toke.

23

If your pot smoking has no adverse afffect on your life now (with the exception of your pastor’s negative judgment), then what reason would you ever have to stop? And if you can think of a good reason to stop in the future, is it possibly a good reason to stop now?

Or do you feel that in some way getting baked could be bad for you?

I have no dog in this fight, but I’ll tell you that I threw out a husband and dumped a pretty awesome boyfriend (two different people and times) because to them getting high was more important than me. That wasn’t what I wanted in a relationship.
I don’t think you’re a bad person, but you have a lot of living left to do and I bet you’d enjoy it more if you could clearly remember it.

24

In my book, smoking dope does not make anyone a bad person. If you fulfill your work and financial obligations, and treat people with respect, go right ahead and light up. Just don’t blow your smoke in my general direction.

25

In Virginia, the penalty for conviction of possession of marijuana, first offense, is jail for up to thirty days and/or a fine of not more than $500. Second and subsequent offenses are punishable by up to a year in jail and a fine of $2,500.

That’s a bit heftier than a speeding ticket, wouldn’t you say?

26

Right on. I will admit that I’m not fond of the habit myself (can’t stand the smell). This is mainly due to one of my former roommates*. I try not to let that color my judgement about pot-smokers in general.

*[sub]Before I moved in, he told me he smoked “occasionally, on the porch”. It wasn’t until after I’d signed the lease and everything that I discovered that “occasionally” meant “every day” and “porch” meant “living room”.[/sub]

27

Are you asking us about our morality or yours? You seem to think that everyone lives by the same set of rules.

And I’m also not sure what the rest of your OP has to do with your pot smoking. Was it to set the stage to say that you live an otherwise full life, so pot is not making you lazy? If that’s the case, is the only thing that’s bad about pot is that it makes you lazy?

There are people who do other things that you may or may not approve of but are not lazy. For instance, is going to prostitutes bad as long as you can do all the other stuff in your life?

I’m going to guess that you’re a Christian based on the fact that you go to church and that your pastor is unhappy about pot use. If I’m mistaken about that, I apologize. But if you’re a Christian, then your morality comes from the Bible. And the Bible says that people should follow the law. I could find you the Scripture but I’m sure your pastor could find it easily as well. And the law says that smoking pot is not allowed. So to be consistent in that sense, pot smoking wouldn’t be allowed.

If your morality comes from another place other than your religion, you’d have to tell us what it’s based on in order for us to know whether something is bad or inconsistent based on those rules.

28

Not really because those penalties are almost always reduced or suspended for a first offense…and it’s still not a felony. Anyway, just because a state has fascist laws doesn’t mean the act is immoral.

29

Sounds to me like you need a new pastor and/or religion.

30

Legality does not equal morality. Never get the two confused.

31

heck, I’m reading this and wondering why morality is tied to religion. Different strokes I guess.

I’m on your side on this one, in the big picture anyway. I’m firmly in the camp of alcohol being far worse than marijuana, especially since I get to deal with obnoxious drunks far too often.

The down side of course, is that for whatever reason, pot is illegal. Legal ramifications are generally not be ignored. That being said, pot smoking recreationally is generally a slap on the wrist, whether that is a slap you want to risk is entirely up to you.

Let me throw this out there for all the folks up thread that offended my sensibilities. In ever culture in the world, there is a substance that is used to alter consciousness, whether it be alcohol, marijuana, opium, meditation, mushrooms, whatever, we all have 'em. There is a quite interesting chapter in the book “Botany of Desire” by Michael Pollan about it. Obviously it is something that humans on the whole like, so I wouldn’t spend too much time beating yourself up about the “morality” of it. Biologically, so many things interact with us like perfectly matched keys with locks it has to make one wonder.

I also watched a man dying of cancer, stop taking the one thing that effectively increase his appetite because it cost $70 a pill (marinol, synthetic marijuana) when he could have gotten a fine bag of pot for the daily cost of his prescription ($280) and it would have lasted a lot longer than a day. Why couldn’t he? Why was he denied the ability to eat decent meals with a modicum of appetite because our society some how thinks that marijuana, which DOES have medicinal uses is worse than alcohol, which is by far, more useless.

Sorry for rambling. I have lifetime migraines which I haven’t ever been able to get decent treatment for because I might become a drug addict, and know for a fact that marijuana absolutely helps. Only I can’t risk my job or my child to not have weekly migraines, so I suffer, and suffer, and suffer. I wish those twats that make the rules could spend one 24 hour migraine with me. Or sit next to a dying person who just wishes like hell they could enjoy one decent meal before they die.

32

If your pastor had a problem with you smoking weed, why didn’t he TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT?

Seriously, what kind of passive-aggressive shmuck is this pastor? Even if smoking weed was wrong (which it isn’t) and it did automatically turn good kids into lazy shitheads (which it doesn’t) I would think that if the pastor cared about you and was troubled by your smoking of weed, he would, you know, maybe, like, take you aside and talk to you about it personally instead of giving you the silent treatment and then preaching a sermon about the evils of the demon weed?

33

I like to think that most people are chemically altered. With, or without drugs.

34

I liked your post. I don’t feel as strongly as you do, but I think we’re at least on the same page.

Anyway, to address this one point: The people I’ve known who used most regularly all had quick tempers, and claimed pot helped them to remain calm. Anyone else find that to ring true?

35

Nope.

I’ve known a few people with quick tempers I WANTED to smoke up, but none of them smoked pot. Mighta helped. :wink:

36

Dude. Yeah. Passive-aggressive pisses me off.

To the OP, no, I don’t think it makes you a bad person. But it does make you a person who’s taking chances that I would not take. And, just let me throw in, no way would I continue taking those chances after deciding to become a parent even if I were willing to take them before.

37

It’s hard to be a pot smoker and maintain a clean religious image. Now that you’ve been outed, it’s either one or the other. Forget your pastor; the congregation of your church is going to be polarized about this as well. Never mind that at least half of them do something shady on the side themselves.

You’ve got the Billy the Goat Fucker syndrome. No matter what your good deeds are, you will always be remembered as “FastWhatNot the Pothead” in your church. The tongues will wag, and you’ll move from pothead to heroin junkie, methhead, and other labels you don’t want to be tagged with.

Try to ignore the baleful stares and chilly attitudes and maybe an opportunity will come up where you can become a savior again, like helping a church member out of a disaster. Maintain a fine example, and eventually the ice will melt. A little. “He’s such a good boy, even if he does do drugs.”

Also, ask yourself this: are you going to this church because you like to and find it rewarding, or are you doing it to maintain an image? If the latter, you can only go so far before your cover’s blown. You knew this. You knew your church would disapprove by default. Your pastor especially. He’s supposed to oversee the flock, and if he doesn’t straighten you out, the congregation will see him as weak and ineffective. It’s not necessarily you they’re disappointed in. They’ll be disappointed in themselves if they don’t do something.

So in the future, try to be discreet. Don’t toke up in your car before you enter the mall. Do it at home and at least change your clothes and pop in a stick of gum or something.

38

Maybe, but then again maybe not. From the link:

“Driving as little as 15 MPH over the limit on an interstate highway now brings six license demerit points, a fine of up to $2500, up to one year in jail, and a new mandatory $1050 tax. The law also imposes an additional annual fee of up to $100 if a prior conviction leaves the motorist with a balance of eight demerit points, plus $75 for each additional point (up to $700 a year). The conviction in this example remains on the record for five years.”

Looks like in Virginia at least it might be better to fly high than drive.

39

Heh. I was going to say that. I guess that says something about English Ministers.

40

I don’t think it necessarily makes you a bad person, but I also think that people tend to be poor judges of their own vices. My father, for example, pours himself a drink first thing in the morning and keeps on drinking until he goes to bed at night. He came to visit me a couple of months ago and I don’t drink so there isn’t any alcohol in the house. After 1 day of not drinking he had a raging headache and had to find the nearest liquor store. He doesn’t think he has a problem at all. He thinks because he owns a successful business and my mom still loves him it isn’t a big deal, but it is a huge deal because it effects the way he interacts with people, it effects the way he spends his free time, since he drinks pretty much all day long he has to be drinking and driving or driving while intoxicated at some point, etc. He will destroy his liver before too long if he doesn’t stop but every time I have ever tried to talk to him about it he just shuts me down, saying that it doesn’t effect anything and I am just overreacting. I’m sure he doesn’t think it makes him a bad person and he would be right about that, but it does effect the rest of his life in a way he isn’t willing to face.