When last we left our intrepid racers they had just swam a few hundred meters as fast as they could and then raced over to find out that it was a double leg (no recuperation for you!). The teams are scattered and really it’ll be whoever makes a mistake tonight that is eliminated. Let’s get to it!
New Race rule…
When $1 Million is on the line, and another team is breathing down your neck…
Do NOT stop to pee.
I have never seen a lead pissed away quite like that…
THREE TIMES! Between two teams they “pissed” away their lead THREE. TIMES.
They should have done a double elimination.
That was … amazing.
In a close contest between Team Erratic But Occasionally Strong and Team Consistently So-So, it came down to a pissing contest.
Why oh why couldn’t Phil just strand both of them?
The Wife and I have made an agreement. If there is a million dollars on the line, you *will *piss your pants if needed.
Should we add that to The Mildly Spectacular Guidelines?
Could we get Kisha and Cara to join up to be the third team?
And by the way, I am the original Alice Cooper lookalike. Accept no substitutes.
Man, Victor can just not help himself, can he. I wonder if he even realized he was reciting along with Tammy.
Great–two teams I actively hate and one team that, while it has a good attitude, has only done well 'cause some of the challenges have been spoon-fed to them are in the final three.
This is the single lamest batch of competitors ever, including the family edition of the show. I know they’re desperate for a girl/girl team to win, but good lord–if they’re gonna make things this easy and make the teams this stupid, what’s the point?
Although I will say that challenge-wise, this was at least a semi-entertaining ep.
Wasn’t this something like the fourth leg in China? Have we ever been in one country for four legs before? Because that makes more than 1/3 of the season spent in a region in which Tammy and Victor have an advantage.
Can’t wait for ZUT’s taxi assessment. Will it go from “Stuck in the desert” to “Trapped in a 'Johnny on the Spot’”
Technically only two legs in China, but three episodes.
I kept thinking about those “What would you do for a million dollars?” type games. We know have a new question: “Would you pee your pants on national tv for a million dollars?” I know I would!
Tammy, love her heart, should have slapped Victor if that’s what it took to get him to shut up. I wonder what would have happened if Margie & Luke had been U-Turned? It would have been another detour performed as a roadblock by Bionic Mom.
I was actually shocked by the ending. I really thought all the drama with the potty stop was drummed up. I was sure Cara & Jaime were farther behind than it appeared. They got me for once!
Finally a more exciting episode this week. To be fair, the excitement was mostly the co-incidental ineptitude of the teams, so it was exciting in the way that watching a clown-car freeway pileup is exciting – but at least there were a few tasks (plus the U-Turn) that allowed teams to mix up the order instead of having everything come down to taxis.
Anyway, time for the…
Taxi Assessment
Stuck in the Desert and Officially Detained - or, Philiminated with extreme prejudice.
Jennifer and Preston,Linda and Steve, Brad and Victoria, Amanda and Kris, Christie and Jodi, Mel and Mike and Mark and Michael - We’ll see these people back next week!
LaKisha and Jennifer (Down from “Rapido!”) - You know, I never really thought I’d say this, but sometimes wetting yourself is simply the smartest and most appropriate thing to do. And much as I appreciated the unintentional hilarity of losing because of a potty break, how much better would the finish have been if urine-soaked Jen, ecstatic over nabbing third place, had given Phil a big hug? Levity aside, this team came in last because of a conflux of reasons. They wouldn’t have lost if they hadn’t been U-Turned. They wouldn’t have lost if they had done better swimming last episode. They wouldn’t have lost if they hadn’t wandered around looking for the U-Turn. They wouldn’t have lost if they’d eaten the street food faster. They wouldn’t have lost if they had a better taxi. And finally (the producers would like us to believe), they wouldn’t have lost but for a potty break. I suppose it kind of sucks to be on the losing end of a bunch of bad news, but most of it was their own fault, and you can’t say that Cara & Jaime didn’t give them every opportunity to advance.
Flat Tire - or, not likely to get anywhere soon.
No one this week.
Stopping for Gas - or, not broken-down, exactly, but not a good sign.
No one, really.
"Rapido! Por Favor?" - or, making meaningless ineffectual comments from the back seat, but in no immediate danger.
Cara and Jaime (down from “Passing Lane”) - And so we learn that Cara has no gag reflex. OK, there’s a lot of ways to go with that, but I let the “boobies” thing lie, so I’ll let this one lie. Really, though, her performance in forcing the street food down her throat was pretty impressive. I’m not usually a fan of Fear Factor eating challanges, but this particular task allowed Cara & Jaime to make up a bunch of time because Cara could do it and Jen could not–and that’s the kind of task that makes TAR interesting, and makes it a “race” instead of a “travel itinerary.” However, the fact that Cara & Jaime needed to make up time underscores this team’s weakness: when something’s not working, they get frustrated and angry and loud and keep doing the same thing. Stop, breathe, think. Is there a better way? Maybe, maybe not, but five minutes thinking beats three hours of wandering. This is why this team isn’t going to actually win, unless the last three tasks involve synchronized dance moves, pom-poms, and limited gag reflexes.
In the Passing Lane - or, ahead of the pack, but not quite comfortably.
Margie and Luke (holding steady) - I couldn’t help but notice that fatigue is really setting in, particularly on Margie, who was acting out like a six-year-old. Margie: shut up, quit squirming, and let Luke paint your face. COnversely, kudos to Margie & Luke for realizing they were doing something wrong looking for the U-Turn and hitting the reset button. I wonder how long it took them to re-evaluate their approach–the fact that they did shows how they’re better than Cara & Jaime; the fact that they needed to shows how they’re worse than Tammy & Victor. Now, next week is only one episode, and truly anything can happen in one episode, but my expectation is that Margie & Luke come in a solid second.
Cruisin’ with Earl - or, drivin’ on the shoulder, takin’ shortcuts, and generally kickin’ butt.
Tammy and Victor (holding steady) - I’m happy to see what was, at least putatively, an appropriate use of the U-Turn to try to knock a competitor out of the race. I’m not particularly convinced that Tammy & Victor didn’t simply like the other teams more than they liked Kisha & Jen, and back-justified a rationale for U-Turning them rather than anyone else. However, Tammy & Victor do stack up favorably in pretty much every department compared to Margie & Luke and Cara & Jaime, so eliminating the one wildcard team that could easily beat them in a sprint wasn’t exactly a bad move. So it looks like Tammy & Victor completely smoked the competition this episode, which isn’t surprising considering they were familiar with the city and the language (which makes me wonder why they didn’t end up first last week). According to Jaime, Tammy & Victor should be out in front by three-ish hours (it’ll be interesting to see start times next week); although I’m certain the producers will make their lead evaporate with an airport bunching, Tammy & Victor have the intangible benefit of coming off a relaxing leg where they performed well rather than a frustrating leg. This team’s been my favorite to win it all for some time, and I see no reason to change that assessment.
[sub]Props to Mullinator and his Raj Ratings.[/sub]
Plus, ignoring the beginning and ending of hte race in U.S.A., they’re only going to hit two continents which I think is the fewest ignoring Family Edition.
Also, did anyone get a really, really creepy sociopath vibe from Victor when he was on the bikes, riding through Tienanmen Square and chirping merrily away in his shrill happy voice about how spiffy it is to see all the army guys raising the flag and how the sun is shining and the birds are singing and lookit all the army guys and the flags!! It’s soo beooo-tiful!..where 2000-3000 kids were massacred.
It’s weird: the producers were amazingly sensitive in Poland about one of the Concentration Camps–and kudos for them. But this? This they blew completely.
At least the food challenge wasn’t so gross – maybe repeated viewings of Bizarre Foods have finally warped my brain, but it seemed pretty innocuous.
I really, really, really detest Jaime. For a pretty girl, she’s so ugly.
Under the right circumstances, I would piss myself for a lot less than a million dollars.
You can’t really compare the Auschwitz moment with this one, because the relationship of the current governments in Europe with that event, and the current government of China with the Tiananmen response, is totally different. I’m guessing that production wouldn’t have been allowed to do such a task in this case. I’m betting that shooting in China is fraught with paperwork, permissions, and whatever the Chinese equivalent of Commissars is looking over production’s shoulders.
And I can’t really fault Victor too much. To someone raised second-generation Chinese-American, the pre-protest history that’s on display in Tiananmen Square probably drowns out, at least in the short time they were there, the more recent history. To the West, “Tiananmen Square” means a brutal suppression of a peaceful student protest. To a Chinese person with any connection to their history, Tiananmen is 1000s of years of history…it is, after all, a large part of the Forbidden City. I can easily believe that Victor’s sense of family history took over there.