I was at a restaurant with friends last night. A lady at the table across from us had the hem of her dress caught in her underwear; when she got up and knelt down to feed a baby in a high chair at the table (I’m assuming her own) she was mooning the restaurant. (She wasn’t wearing a thong but lots was showing.)
After doing a spit take, we debated over whether or not to tell her. There were several people at the table with her but she was positioned in such a way that they couldn’t see. It’s very awkward to tell a complete stranger “Pardon me ma’am, but I do believe yore bee-hind is showin’” as there’s the matter of "Which is more embarassing: to be told that by a stranger or to realize later you’ve been mooning the room? And if you never realize you’ve been mooning the room, is it not better to never be informed?
Luckily she seemed to feel a draft and took care of the situation without being told. For future situations such as this though, what would you do?
Two things are important:
-The woman is a total stranger
-This is a public place where there’s no way not to be seen whispering something in her ear and in so doing you might draw more attention than she’s already drawn to herself
This is one of those times where it’s good to have an expressive face. I would look at her with a “your butt is showing!!” look on my face, and she would get what I’m saying. Or not.
I wonder if you should touch your own skirt or pants, like how people will touch their own face to tell someone that something is on their face.
As mortified as I would be if a stranger came up to me and told me my ass was showing, gratitude for them telling me would trump all. I would be even more mortified if I discovered it on my own later and realised that people saw it and never told me.
I think I would have walked over to her table, tapped her on the shoulder, or got her attention somehow, and then quietly told her that her hem was caught and she was exposing herself. Sure it would be embarrassing for both of us, but I feel it would be my obligation to save her further embarrassment.
I have a huge fear of this kind of stuff happening - I never leave a bathroom without double checking to make sure my clothes are where they should be.
In those situations, I have. It used to happen in hallways at work back when women wore dresses. You’d walk up to them and whisper “your skirt’s tucked into your nylons!”
In the case you are talking about I think I’d walk up to the table, coochy coo the baby in that “my isn’t this stranger being intrusive” sort of way and then softly say “your skirt’s tucked into your nylons, and that IS a cute baby.”
If at all possible, I would deploy my tablemates to act as a human fence - facing out - and then inform the lady she was having a “wardrobe malfunction”.
Yes, it’s going to attract attention, but with others standing between her and the prospective audience, perhaps her dignity could be preserved.
I’d just go over and politely whisper to her. If I were a dude, I’d send a chick over to do it. For some reason, it’s a little less embarrassing that way, me thinks-- though I really have no reason for thinking of it that way. I just know I’d be less embarrassed.
The answer to the OP is of course, “very carefully.”
In that situation I might tell a fib and say something like “You’ve got a tag showing in the back.” She’d reach back and realize that something different was amiss, and she gets to save a little face with her group.
My grandfather would never have spoken aloud of the matter but would likely have stood behind her (facing away) and shielding her from unwanted gazes.
I came into this thread thinking it was one of those cases where her pants were riding a little low and her shirt was a little to tight in which case I’d say just ignore it. But in this case I would just go over to her and politely say “Your dress is caught” as I put my hand around my own back as if to untuck the back of my shirt. I think that would get the message across in the least embarrassing way.
ok posters here are very funny…solidarity, London, France and notes from The Restaurant fanclub. ; >
WRT the poster who ask about an unzipped fly, I’ve often given male co-workers a heads-up look then motioned zipping a fly. It never fails.
If it were a random guy on the subway, he’s on his own. No heads-up motion, no zipping, or unzipping in case it were misconstrued as a sexual semaphore.
This. The direct approach is best; she’s a stranger, so it’s not like she has an ongoing relationship with you. Just walk up to her, quietly say she’s caught her dress up and should check her skirt, then walk away. Best coming from a woman, not sure why. But I’ve picked lint off of strangers, if needed, or tucked tags, and I wouldn’t think it strange if another woman did the same for me.