Analogies: the game

The Game Room
1

Analogies used to be a parlor game back before radio, TV, and Wii. A host would call out an adjective and a conjunction or preposition (e.g. “busier than”) and a player would have to respond with either an old classic (“a one legged man at an ass kicking contest” or “a mule at harvest”) or make up a new one.

So for this game, respond to the previous analogy and then give the adjective for the next person. Okay to use a known analogy but originals are super welcome.
I’ll start:

Awkward as… Monticello on Father’s Day.

Nervous as…

2

**Nervous as ** . . . a whore in church. (I like the classics.)

**Hotter than ** . . .

3

Hotter than . . . a freshly-baked apple pie on the surface of the sun.

**Tight as . . . **

4

…a one-legged ballerina.

Wet as…

5

the back of an illegal immigrant on the Titanic.
Dumber than…

6

…a box of rocks.

Classics, gotta love 'em.

Prettier than…

7

Prettier than a hundred dollar bill you find in a second hand coat pocket…

More ironic than…

8

…an Alanis Morisette analogy that misuses the word “irony.”

Sadder than…

9

…the xkcd hat guy without his hat.

More fannish than…

10

More fannish than… a Trekkie at Leonard Nimoy’s yard sale.
More fanatical than…

11

…an evangelical at a Wiccan convention.

Goofier than…

12

…Gomer Pyle on laughing gas.
Cooler than …

13

James Dean’s leather jacket.
Healthier than…

14

…a tofu salad.

Wilder than…

15

…Gene Wilder and Laura Ingalls Wilder put together.

Filthier than…

16

a plumber and his pig after they jump into an open sewer.

Cleaner than…

17

…Joss Whedon’s ass after a Science Fiction Convention.

Cold as…

18

…the northern ball on a west-bound polar bear.

Deeper than…

19

… the Trieste for twenty minutes in 1960.

Rocking more than…

20

…a veranda full of geezers.

Sweeter than …