andrewdt85: a defense

[Skywatcher]

@featherlou

• give people the benefit of the doubt and ask for clarification before you go off the deep end. There are many times that people and tone are misunderstood - I often post sarcastically or humourously, but very rarely with intent to hurt, and if people took everything I posted seriously, there would be lots of hurt feelings where none were intended.

I agree with this in its entirety and would like to add that you shouldn’t let any clarification be clouded by preconceived notions, thus going off the deep end anyway.

[Zoe]

andrewdt85: Your behavior there only proves what I posted about ‘great’ men in my Pit thread this week; that beneath it all, most men are complete petty and pathetic shit. As you say, you proved it better than I could have in that thread itself.

<snip>

I see that there were times in which you posted asking for other users to show the (paraphrasing) ‘kindness, compassion, and decency that we here at the SD are supposed to encompass.’ There was a thread in which you make light of those in the pit who do nothing but throw feces at others like monkeys at a zoo. You start threads to share your compassion for your family and for women as friends. But it wasn’t until you started a Pit thread for a user, having the support of the entire board the whole time, that you showed your true self by admitting
(paraphrasing)
Yep (I taunted him). I thought he had no balls. I still think he has no balls. (bold type added)

andrew, I found what you had to say very interesting. Please don’t take what I say as a criticism of you, but maybe it will give you a little insight into how you think.

Is it possible that you look for the worst in others and, when you find it, see that as proof of how pathetic men really are? Why didn’t the compassionate side of Case Sensitive reveal part of his “true self” to you? Why was it only the side of him that could be tough and hard that you believed to be “true”?

People aren’t all good or all bad. If you look for a reason to be angry with them – to reject them – to keep them at a distance, you are going to find one.

[andrewdt85]

No, Zoe- one’s internet persona is hardly a ‘true self’- I can attest to that, believe me. And what you’ve said about looking for the worst in people, or looking at their worst as their ‘true selves,’ is true- that’s a cynical and pessimistic fallacy that I shouldn’t make in the future.

Great responses by everyone, Case included. I suppose it’s not necessary to post all the lessons learned by me at this point, because it’s obvious to you (seeing as they were mentioned in my threads and again here, and it’s understandable how well the lessons have been learned now). Most importantly to get straight, though, is that I’ll be making sure to moderate the number of threads I start in any forum each week (one or two, at most), making sure to hold off on any others until later weeks, and being even tougher a judge of what to post or not; besides that, we know the other things I’ve learned, and there’s a lot I’ve learned that I needn’t post.

[Scissorjack]

@andrewdt85

Great responses by everyone, Case included. I suppose it’s not necessary to post all the lessons learned by me at this point, because it’s obvious to you (seeing as they were mentioned in my threads and again here, and it’s understandable how well the lessons have been learned now).

Classy response, andrewdt85, and kudos to you for having the guts to stick around and try to improve instead of ending this in flaming wreckage: I’m really glad to see this little episode end productively. Stick around, mate.

[Brainiac4]

I think this puts our “posters redeemed by being Pitted” count at two in recent months (Scott Plaid being the other example).

I think our batting average is still low, but sometimes we connect.

[deevee]

And remember that a good salesman always clams up once the sale has been made. Good on ya andrewt85