My sympathies. 
Just a quick apology to the OP for hijacking his thread with my own woes. I posted in the wee small hours, and things always seem worse then. Offer of a listening ear via email/PM still stands though.
soz.
I live in Kent, too, BTW. I’d take a cat from you but my mom’s allergic. I’m (hopefully) moving in a few months, I could take one then…
Keep on, man.
racer, the only thing I can offer is advice from someone who is so clinical about money it doesn’t titillate me in the least: When a spouse has unresolvable money issues, and a philosophy of solving money problems that differs so radically from your own, then that’s it – it’s over; it’s a dealbreaker. It’s worth breaking up over because otherwise you will ultimately have nothing but day-in and day-out misery. It sounds like this is the case with you, so what I’m trying to say is: if you handle things right from now on, the power to solve your money problems is now solely in your hands, so take advantage of it and make a much, much, much happier life for yourself as a result. Good luck and congratulations.
Sounds horrible, good luck. Do you have to get rid of the animals immediately? Were they more heres than yours? Sometimes having a pet around in dark days is really therapeutic.
racer72, I’m so sorry to hear about your difficulty. I truly hope things will look better with some distance.
Even though it hurts now, wounds heal better with clean edges. It’s just as true for damaged relationships.
Good luck and take care of yourself.
You do have someone to lean on. You have members of this group. But your situation sounds pretty awful- it will be for the best. There are so many unhappy couples living together because either one is not willing to make the decision.
Sending good thoughts your way.