Another thing I do that the internet told me is a New York thing: You're welcome!

If, lets say, I the door for someone and they stroll in like they’re royalty and I’m a peasant who will not be acknowledged, I say “You’re welcome!” all indignantly. OK, I’m from The Bronx and i usually say, “Youwelcom”, but you know what I mean. Over at a crafty-type forum, a side conversation mentioned that thing New Yorkers do to remind others to say “Thank you” And here I thought it was just me being snarky and a bit rude (but not as rude as the Kings and Queens of the Universe to whom it is beneath to utter a courtesy.)

I’d dismiss it as being a New York out of hand, but ever since I found out a roll with butter isn’t a universal breakfast food on the go, I’ve been a bit more circumspect. Whadyathink?

P.S., I was also surprised to learn that the question/answer type statement is a Yiddishism (is that a word) that was picked up by New Yorkers. You know, the What am I? Chopped Liver? construct. Now, lets see if I remember how to make a poll. . .

Calling out “You’re Welcome” to someone who has not said “Thank You” is responding to a mild rudeness with a much more blatant one. New York or not, it’s kind of dickish, so I don’t do it.

It’s sorta aggressive. IMO.

Yeah, and?

I voted: I don’t do it and I’m not from NYC.

I’ve heard it in other places besides New York. It isn’t really effective because the jerkass is already looking for the next person to offend.

From* Frasier* - Niles teaches his father how to talk Jewish.

I say it to my wife from time to time, although it’s usually in a patronizing way. For instance, if she is ransacking the house looking for her keys, about to lose her mind with frustration and I find them in two seconds.

I picked " I don’t do it and I’m from New York" because I usually don’t do it. But I have and it is sort of aggressive. And it’s meant to be. Which is why I usually don’t do it - because most of the time, the non-thanker has his/her attention elsewhere or seems to be generally oblivious. But there are the ones who stroll in like royalty, who will happily leave me holding the door and waiting for their entire party of ten to go through. They either get “You’re welcome” or else I just let the door go.

I might say it jokingly to someone I know well, but I can’t imagine saying it to a stranger.

So, I picked no.

Polynesian demigods do it. They even spontaneously sing about it.

New York must have softened up. Time was a remark like that would get a “You talkin’ to me?” at best and “Hey Fuckface, I didn’t need no door opened in the foist place…” in most cases. Just picture yourself saying that to Tony Soprano.


I don’t hold doors open for the gratitude. I do it because it’s polite.

It’s pretty rude. I don’t particularly associate it with New York, but rather with a sarcastic assholism.

I remember early one morning I found a wallet at Kroger. So I took it up to the customer service. They weren’t actually open yet but there was a woman working behind the counter. She sees me standing there but she’s just ignoring me. When I call out to her, she responds with: “Were not open yet”. I tell her: “I realize that, I just want to turn this wallet in”. She responds with a big obnoxious sigh, and then walks over and snatches the wallet from my hand with out saying a word.


That was the only time I’ve used that phrase outside of friends or family. And I don’t regret it either.

I hold the door because I want to and not because I expect anything of any kind.

OK-- I hold it rather than being run down by someone in a hurry or bumping into them in my rush. But still …

Besides it sounds to me rather passive-agressive for the ostensibly expected agressive-agressive culture of NYC.

Yeah that’s true.

I’m from New York. I’m aware that this is done but I don’t do it myself.

I could conceivably do it in a joking manner to someone I know, based on having seen it on TV. But it would not occur to me to even think that way out in the real world.

If someone didn’t even acknowledge me holding the door, I’d assume they were shy, socially awkward, busy/distracted, or even autistic before I’d assume they were being rude.

The closest thing I can think of is saying “excuse me” in a bit more forceful tone if someone bumped into me and didn’t say anything.

Demanding acknowledgement of a favor is or service just as rude—if not more rude—than failing to acknowledge the favor.

If you expect a thank you then It’s no longer a selfless act.

By Pointing out the failure to thank. You just erased the news to thank.