I can’t add much to what is already said, except that I understand something of what you’re going through.
Given that you can’t get 10 Dopers to agree on just about anything, the unanimity of opinion on this thread should be taken as a strong indication that you’ve made the correct decisions.
And why you didn’t specifically address this issue, let me add that you needn’t worry about the kitty should you decide to try again. During my wife’s pregnancies, we had between 2 and 4 cats in the house, various ages. My job was to care for them, and we had no problems whatsoever.
May you find some comfort from this thread.