It is very close to my dog’s time to go. I had a thread about it earlier this spring. He is still hanging in there, but recent developments don’t look good. I have class today, but I can’t stop crying this AM. I have to go to class, it is three hours a day/three week class and missing one day is like missing a week in a normal semester - the prof drilled into our heads how bad missing class would be. If there was anything I could do to save my dog’s life this AM I would have no second thoughts about skipping class, but since I am helpless at this point in regards to his health, I resigned myself to go.
I know I am panicking and might be fine once I’m there, but is there anything to stop the crying, or keep it at bay?
I feel for you! You should be fine in class as long as you promise yourself to let go when you are home!
When it was time for my cat of 16 years to go, I managed to get through work just praying that he would last until I got home to hold him. He did, then went quickly. The waterworks came on full blast, but it was a very private grieving. I avoided public displays by letting myself give in to the grief at home.
16 years. Bachelorhood, one marriage, bachelorhood again, into another marriage. Damn, I miss him!
Sorry to hear this. Always afraid of the day mine will go.
At any rate, I think once you are at class doing your thing, you will likely go into sort of an “automatic” mode, where you’ll just be kind of numb and doing your thing in an abstract way. It’s hapopened to me with the death of pets and grandparents in the past and I’ve seen it with ohters. You’ll make it through, but it won’t mean much.
Buck up, my friend. It is sad, but it is a part of life. You’ve had all the good years with your furry little pal, and that is what should be remembered. You’ll get through the day and back to your friend before you know it. Hang in there, Bosc.
I’m so sorry. Wish I could help you. After the late great Miss Emily Kimberly left us (very suddenly and unexpectedly, too, and about a week before Christmas), I thought Mr. S would be the one to fall apart, as she was his best friend and vice versa. Nope, I was the basket case. Crying jags, lying on the floor in her favorite spot, trying to catch some essence of her. Very embarrassing. And I work at home, so I couldn’t get a break from being where she had been. I even broke down while on the phone with a client. Ugh. I cringe just thinking about it. (Luckily the client was a very nice lady who totally understood.)
I really don’t remember how I ever got out of it. But the advice to try to get absorbed in your classwork, even if only for a little while, sounds good. (So they’re still doing interim classes in the UW system, eh? Always seemed like a great way to pick up an easy three credits. I can’t imagine trying to complete one in your shoes, though. Any chance you could bail and make it up later, if worse comes to worst?)
I made it. It was tough, I started crying in the car about a mile from school. I sat in the parking lot debating about going in, and finally decided to go for it. I told my Prof what was going on, but once class started my mind switched into work mode. I tried not to drift off.
I have been preparing for this for the last few months - I know it will probably be soon. Tomorrow is the vet appointment so I’ll know more in a few days after all the tests are in. I hope we can make it for another two weeks, then my class will be done and I’ll be free until July. When I have gone through this with my cats I was able to take time off work to grieve. I just wish there was a pill or something from the doctor to ease some of the pain, or at least hold back the tears when I need it.
Talking about it helps - just in case you didn’t already realize that However, it is distinctly possible that you will continue to feel “weepy” about your impending loss from now until a year or more after it actually happens, especially if you don’t have another pet at home. If you do, that one will help you to get through the grieving.
I lost my Lollypop (last of my Danes) in 1991, and I can still tear up if I talk (or write) very much about her. If I’d been able to get another dog at the time, I would have gotten over the loss more completely and much faster. But I was (long-term) house-sitting at the time, and the owner asked that I not bring another dog in. By the time I moved out of there, I was beginning to have the problems that put me on disability a few years later.
If you can, get another dog (or cat) soon. There are lots of animals out there that need homes, and it is generally agreed that pets help us be healthier both mentally and physically. It also might make the going easier fcr the dog you now have. If he has been one of several pets in your home in the past, he may feel that he has to hang on as long as possible, so as not to leave you alone. Some dogs really are that sensitive. If that’s the case, it will help him relax (and thus probably last longer), if he sees you bringing home a new (pet) companion.
Sorry for your loss. I’ve been there more times than I care to thnk about.
My best advice as a former veterinary techincian and current minister is to bite your tongue during the ceremony…then get a really ripping CD of Amazing Grace done by bagpipes whenyou’re back home and weep then. I’ve had to do it more than once, and I sympathize with your loss.
Thanks. I’m geting ready to go to the vet. I do have many other animals - two other dogs, three cats and a horse. This dog is my very first dog, and we’ve been together 13 years…it is very hard. Despite being 39 years old and having animals almost my whole life, I have never had to make the ‘put to sleep’ decision before. My childhood cats stayed with my parents and they made that decision for them. I came close with my cat Boo, but he died at the vet’s office (lymphoma) before I made the decision (I was not aware how serious it was, it had come on fast and took his life quickly). All my other animals are still with me, which leads to another big problem - all are getting up in years. I have a 14 year old cat, the two other dogs are near 13 years old, and my horse is an elderly 22. I am going to be facing a lot of pain in the near future.
Scarlett67 - the summer classes are great! I don’t mind a three hour class every day, but doing three days’ worth of homework every night is a bit draining. I am taking one more class this summer, for six credits total.
However, it is distinctly possible that you will continue to feel “weepy” about your impending loss from now until a year or more after it actually happens, especially if you don’t have another pet at home. If you do, that one will help you to get through the grieving.