All right, I’m going to go ahead and type up the Chikara show I saw in Gibsonville NC last night. I took photos on my Android, and I’m currently trying to figure out how to transfer them to Google Drive. I’ll post links to them later.
I got there about 10 minutes late. I didn’t recognize the place at first. It looked like one of those strip malls way out in the country that lease to churches and not-so-discreet business ventures. I walked around the whole structure before I found the entrance. It was a nice little setup, and I do men little. The front lobby had already been decked out for merchandising and photo ops with the stars. A match had already started. I found my co-worker and his wife and sat next to them.
I had front row seats, which meant I could practically reach out and touch the ring. There was very little room for out-of-ring action, so the audience had to get and move out of the way in case it took place. My side was considered the rear. The referee kept getting in the way of my good shots.
Pix of roster for reference
The emcee was a curly haired Greek guy named Gavin Loudspeaker. He really knew how to work the audience. He was all over the arena and among the crowd at points, and got the kids involved.
Much like LU, the girls take on the men. Each wrestler had their own flag that they got to come out with a wave during their intro. Chikara rules DQ anybody who engages in “Excessive Violence.” The Trios matches allow wrestlers to step in when one of their team gets thrown out, without having to tag. Otherwise, a lot like WWE. One thing I noticed a lot of wrestlers were doing, is that whenever a fist or boot would make contact, they’d slap the side of their own belly to get the SMACK sound.
Challenge of the Immortals series - I guess it’s some kind of tournament that’s spread over the season, one for singles, one for tag team, and one for trios.
Chuck Taylor and Orange Cassidy vs Amasis and Worker Ant - There’s about 10 guys who have some kind of ant gimmick. I’m guessing if you haven’t thought of an identity yet, they make you one of the ants. Taylor and Cassidy were the young cocky heels. I don’t recall the masked guys contributing much offense, as the heels were always jacking and jawing and posing for the audience. They would even lean over the ropes and tell the front row “Watch this! I’m going to cheat!” and do something underhanded. Taylor and Cassidy won.
Jakob Hammermeier vs Argus, the Master of the Gecko-Roman Style - Argus wears a green bodysuit and mask, like a lizard. During intermission, he sat in the ring ropes and sold T-shirts. Argus was pretty good. I wasn’t too impressed with Jakob, but he won the match.
Gavin announced that the next match had a Magic Move. If anybody in the next match performed a Over-the-top-rope Cross-body Plancha, otherwise known as the Pescado Plancha, everybody in the audience would get a free souvenir Chikara drinking cup.
Mr. Touchdown vs Frightmare - John Cena is obviously Mr. Touchdown’s role model. I really liked him. He did a lot of high impact moves and showed a high level of energy. Frightmare was more of a generic lucha and didn’t really act the heel too much. When TD was down and Frightmare left the ring, I thought he was going to do the Magic Move and got the crowd to chanting PES-CA-DO! PES-CA-DO! He did something else though. TD later set FM up for a superflex, but a girder was directly over that part of the ring, so he had to hold him at an angle before hitting the floor. Then, FM fell out of the ring and TD did the Pascado Plancha on him, so we all got a free cup! FM won with a crucifix later.
The Last of the Dying Breed Eddie Kingston vs Oleg the Usurper - Eddie was using Bull Demspey’s old bruiser gimmick, while Oleg was channeling Nord the Barbarian. Oleg was awesome. He really got into character. He was a tall dude with long hair and beard dressed like a viking. He’d stomp around and talk like Volstagg from Thor comics. “I need more speed” he’d announce before running the ropes and doing a corner charge. “Want me to squash little man?” he’d ask the audience. We started singing OLEG OLEGOLEGOLEG OLEGGGG OLEGGGG like for Sami Zayn. Eddie popped Oleg in the chest a few dozen times during the match, and it sounded painful. At one point, Oleg had Eddie down for the three count, but Eddie had his leg draped over the bottom rope. I sang OH LEG OH LEG OH LEG OH LEGGGG… Oleg eventually won with “Off With His Head.”
During intermission, the stars were at their tables singing autographs and getting their pictures taken with fans. Oleg was milling around talking to people. He saw me taking a picture of him, so he came up to me and put his arm around me. “Let’s do selfie.” The Android thing is new to me though, and I couldn’t figure out how to switch views. He said “Don’t worry, Oleg show you how.” He went ahead and pushed every button he could find. I said “Thanks, oh Mighty Oleg” and spent the rest of intermission fixing my phone back.
Prakash Sabar wears a mask that looks like X-Pac, wild long hair with tongue hanging out. He was at the heel table, and kept his hand up with the wolf gesture the whole time.
Challenge of the Immortals Trios match - Devastation Corporation (Max Smashmaster, Blaster McMassive and Flex Rumblecrush) vs The Ice Creams (Ice Cream Jr. and El Hijo Del Ice Cream) and Princess Kimberlee
The DC guys were the three largest on Chikara’s roster teamed together, and all wore Road Warriors style face paint. Max was a big fat dude, probably 350 lbs or so. Blaster looks kind of like Titus O’Neill with a beard. Flex was a tall blond guy. The Ice Creams weren’t much bigger than Kimberlee, who resembles Alexa Bliss pre-heel. This match had some funny moments, mainly because the Ice Creams were so ineffective. Kimberlee wound up working most of the match and took most of DC’s killer finishing moves. Max was eventually DQ’ed for the above mentioned “Excessive Violence” rule when he used the Tombstone Piledriver on one of the Ice Creams three times.
Before the next match, Gavin came out and praised the NC audience for being so awesome, and plugged NC band The Mountain Goats, who I guess has a new album coming out. He mentioned the album has a wrestling theme.
Proletariat Boar of Moldavia (with his manager Juan Francisco de Coranado and valet Prakash Sabar) vs Shynron
Shynron is Chikara’s version of Kallisto. PBoM is a tall guy wearing a boar mask with tusks, and actually has a tail. Juan acted the prissy heel manager, and Prakash was the sneaky underling. PBoM needs more steroids to be an effective monster heel, but Shynron made the match anyway. He did all the high-flying aerial moves. At one point, he was pummeled in the corner, and while the ref was admonishing PBoM, Prakasfh slipped into the ring and did X-Pac’s Bronco Buster on Shynron. Near the match’s end, all three heels were gathered outside the ring close to where I was sitting, and Shyn grabbed on the overhead girder, climbed over, and dropped on them. I managed to get a few good pix of that part which I hope to post later. Shynron eventually won the match.
Challenge of the Immortals Trios match - Missile Assault Ant (I think), Lucas Calhoun and Kevin Condron (with Arctic Ant) vs Icaraus, Heidi Lovelace and Dasher Hatfield (with Mr. TD)
MA Ant had a mask with LED lights and took it off. He’s otherwise a bald bearded guy wearing urban camos. Lucas Calhoun is a fat Elvis impersonator like Honky Tonk Man. Kevin Condron is like Raven, a brooding emo guy in white T-shirt and black pants. There was some kind of love triangle story with he, Icarus and Heidi. I gather Kevin and Heidi used to be a couple, but he got too controlling and emotionally abusive, so she left him for Icarus. Icarus has long blond hair and wears a bodysuit with wing designs. Heidi is kind of like NEXT’s Bayley, but not as exuberant. Dasher wears a mask of a guy with a curly mustache, like something from the Vaudeville era.
The match started with Kevin vs Icarus. KC laid down and said “pin me, I don’t care.” The ref wouldn’t allow it. I yelled “Go back to your barrista job and next time DOUBLE LATTE!” I also chanted “I’M I-RON-IC” clap clap clapclapclap but it didn’t catch on. The other heels wouldn’t tag KC any more as the match went on, so he sat down in his corner looking depressed.
Ant Guy seemed to be the most talented of the bunch as far as working ability goes, but everybody else did their jobs well. At one point, he had Heidi in dire straits, but Kevin ran in and wouldn’t let him execute the move. Still pines for Heidi. Icarus ran in and all the sudden the action took place at super speed. He kept throwing Kevin to the corner and doing a flying charge on him, and damn, those dudes were fast! I watched a Kevin Condron match when I got him, and he’s really talented. He didn’t actually work too much in this match, but he played his role well. He retrieved a chair from backstage and acted like he was going to use it on Icarus, but reconsidered and left the building instead. Dasher eventually got the win for his team.
Gavin came out and thanked us for coming, but we chanted ONE MORE MATCH! ONE MORE MATCH! Gavin came back without his shirt. I thought he was going to be in the encore match. He kept saying they were too tired and had been out on the road for too long, but then we got our encore match.
Juan Francisco de Caronado vs Silver Ant - Silver Ant won with the Nokomura Lock.
After the event was over, I drove out of the parking lot and saw Kevin Condron standing outside the entrance alone, brooding. He was still in character! I pulled over and got a couple of pix of him. He acted like I wasn’t there. I must say, I was expecting silliness and stupidity for this event, but didn’t expect this level of serious commitment. Hats off to Kevin Condron. He is now my favorite indie.