Any WWE fans in the audience? (Part 1)

The Game Room
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Well, the moment Vince announced the tourney was for the championship, the obvious playbook call is that Roman retains and that Vince even throws in some screw job elements to try even harder to put Roman over with the same goddamn booking flow they’ve used forever.

Time to put the fucking Superman Playbook away, Vince. We all know he makes you hard, but “Invincible Superman who overcomes every obstacle thrown in his path by the Evil Owner” has been your playbook since Hogan entered the picture, and it’s grown very very stale.

Oh, and I know I’ve been bringing up cuts forever and they haven’t happened, but they just put Slater in another group of 3 losers, so I expect Axel and that-other-guy-I-can’t-remember to be cut soon.

That and if the Bullet Club rumors are true, they really really need to start cutting their underused players.

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They kinda already did that one in March 2014 actually. It was the first time Raw did Chicago since Punk had walked out, Meltzer was declaring with dead certainty that the walkout was a work and Punk was going to make his return at that show, and on top of that there was a thing going around on social media urging the fans to hijack the show to protest Batista’s forced push. The very beginning of the show they played Cult of Personality and the crowd went wild… and then out came Paul Heyman, alone, and said “Oh, were you expecting someone else? I’m sorry, he’s not here!”

The crowd was dead for the rest of the night.

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So who’s going to get thrown out the quickest this year?

I’m going with Adam Rose.

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Dave Meltzer is reporting John Cena will be out 6-9 months due to a shoulder injury.

Anyone else hear the panic coming from Stanford?

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As hard as it may be for WWE, this injury could be the catalyst for some real change. I, for one, have no interest in a Cena/Undertaker match at Wrestlemania. WWE may now be forced to push some new talent.

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Or they could book Big Show vs. Kane again.

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6-9 months our time? or 6-9 months John Cena time? Because there is a biiiiig difference.

I never really want injury on anyone, but I’d love for Reigns to tweak his ankle or be out a month or two right now, just so see the world implode.

That being said, this might pave the way for Daniel Bryan to come back so they can have at least SOME star power

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It’s being reported that he has a torn rotator cuff, which isn’t the kind of injury that he can just force himself back into the ring 4-6 weeks later because Vince is leaving him a dozen messages a day about how the company can’t survive without him.

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Daniel Bryan’s chances of returning have massively increased. Only problem is, he would be #2 face behind Vince’s boy Roman and probably have to look at the lights for LoN.

I still hope Finn doesn’t get called up. I wouldn’t mind if Sami Zayn does though, provided they renew his feud with KO. KO vs Ambrose is good, but KO vs Zayn is epic.

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Unfortunately, they will NOT being back DBD, as much as they should have a couple of months ago. Bringing him back during Wrestlemania season will cause too many problems and let’s face it, Vince and his Top. Men. don’t think they can push DBD again because he’s too fragile.

Never mind all the other top guys out injured.

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Meanwhile, at the Performance Center…

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I love Bryan as much as the next guy, but if Vince and co. are scared of bringing him back because of his injury risk…they’re kinda right.

I’m mixing metaphors a bit, but as a Packers fan I remember watching Brett in his last days and watching him get a big hit and thinking “Oh God, that was it…he’s done”. I don’t want to do that every time I see Bryan jump from the top rope or get DDTd

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Before Brock broke The Streak, I would have been very interested to see Undertaker vs. Cena at WrestleMania, for the “Holy shit, they really wouldn’t have CENA break The Streak, would they?”, factor.

Now that The Streak has been broken, quite frankly I don’t know what Undertaker’s still doing in WWE.

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Semi-interesting news from the FOUR HOUR Full-Sail taping yesterday.

WWE Kids is a thing and they tape matches before NXT starts. They had a girl on commentary (maybe…10? I dunno I’m terrible with ages) and had a bunch of kids in “WWE Kids” shirts at ringside. They also brought in Izzy (who cleans up well actually) in for an interview with The Big Show after his match against Heath Slater. The other match was Becky Lynch facing Nattie.

Holy Hell 4 Hours is a long time. By the time they got to the main event of whatever show they were on the crowd was D-E-D Dead.

No Bullet Club appearance either in case anyone was curious.

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WWE Kids. Oh joy…

SD on USA is an actual improvement. New announcer Mauro Ranallo is really good, and oddly enough not homegrown WWE talent. Lawler assumed semi-heel duties, and Byron Saxton acted as exasperated face.

Cena acted as the show MC, setting up ADR vs Kallisto in the opening match. He eventually took off his jersey, revealing a bandaid on his shoulder. Really? That’s his injury? I guess they’ll still have him around in a non-wrestling role so they can have at least one A-lister to draw in the mainstream audience.

The Becky Lynch/Charlotte match had some old school booking. Ric Flair played the heel manager role to the hilt. There haven’t been heel managers in a long time, the ones who distract referees, put their wrestler’s foot on the ropes, and commit other acts of cheating. I can see Ric taking a bump when a pissed-off Diva attacks him. Becky and Natalya are the only face Divas left, unless the Bellas swerve again or something. Where’s Sasha?

I miss the old heel managers like Bobby the Brain Heenan, Jim Cornette, Playboy Gary Hart, Sir Oliver Humperdink, Skandar Akbar, Captain Lou Albano, & Paul Jones. RoH’s Truth Martini is the only classic heel manager left in any organization, as far as I know. Veda Scott is more like a sassy valet, like Missy Hyatt. Paul Heyman’s redefined himself as more of a meta personality.

I’m guessing Miz Tv’s guests are more Rumble entrants, so add Zig, Golddust, Neville, R Troof, Miz and New-hoo Day-hee to the list.

The show closed out with KO vs Ambrose, always a good thing. Prior to the match, Renee Young asked KO for an interview, and he pulled up her wrist, looked at her watch, and said “OK, but you’ve got one minute.” During the interview, he kept checking her watch. He really enjoys being a dick. They battled to a double count-out, so I guess that means a rematch at RR.

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Yeah, I liked that ‘looking at the watch’ bit.

Enzo Amore is someone I have pegged as being able to have a Bobby Heenan style career if they let him. He could be a great manager, take sick bumps, be the guy you hate so much you pay to see him get his, and eventually move to the heel commentary role as well.

NOT NOT NOT liking them involving Izzy and other kids. Getting fans at ringside involved like that is a huge mistake that will backfire on them down the line as other children (and worse, their forceful parents*) try to get involved in the show to get recognition. Someone is going to get physically hurt bad at some point and it’s going to involve a lot of litigation and bad bad bad PR.

  • Think about the asshole abusive or just narcissistic parents who ‘coach’ their kids in soccer and beauty pageants. Do you really want those sorts of people targetting WWE?
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The funny thing is I don’t know where they even GOT the kids because the stage manager was bitching to Ms. Cups and I (and another group of 3) that they invited the kids and their families in, but didn’t tell the venue. So they overbooked Full Sail and were scrambling to stick us late-comers in random seats. We were really close to getting ringside isle seats.

Also need to give huge props to Finn. He main events the last match every week practically and goes and “too sweet”'s every. single. fan. at ringside. He is the best.

Random Rumble prediction I just thought of: Taker wins the rumble/belt, faces RR in a title vs. career match, he loses and goes into the hall. This gives Taker another moment of glory with the title and also solves the “who faces Taker at WM” question since everyone is injured

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Another piece of news from yesterday. They gave JJ and Bagels a team name now and it’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You ready for it?

American Alphas

This probably means they’re getting a shirt soon, and I’m not going to get it because, seriously? American Alphas? Not even “Alpha Americans?”

Ugh

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Yeah, not liking that at all. They didn’t need a team name.

And what was wrong with “Jordan Bagels”? :stuck_out_tongue:

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Also out with an injury. WWE is going to have to start giving wrestlers more time off between shows and/or having them work slower less high-impact matches, or we’re going to end up with Heath Slater vs. Curtis Axel as the main event of 'Mania.

As it is, it’s looking like Vince is going to have to call in some favors, bring in some part-timers, and hot-shot some of the new guys in order to put together a solid card if he wants to sell out Cowboys Stadium. The best card I can think of that’s plausible at this point would look something like this;

World title: Roman Reigns vs. Triple H
Rock vs. Brock
Undertaker vs. Chris Jericho
Triple threat, 3-on-3-on-3 tag titles match: New Day vs. Bullet Club vs. Wyatt Family
IC title: Dean Ambrose vs. Shinsuke Nakamura
Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor
Divas title: Charlotte vs. Stephanie McMahon, guest referee Ronda Rousey
Kevin Owens vs… someone?