“Skyrockets in flight,
Septic Shit Delight!
Woah-oh-Septic Shit Delight!”
The “savory” and “dog” don’t parse metrically, but otherwise, you’re right on.
Well, yeah, but that’s true of anything: consume it long enough and it becomes normal.
But diet soda? It’s like meatless chili. Don’t get me started on caffeine-free.
The whole POINT of soda is to give you sugar and caffeine. You take those two elements out, all you have is fizzy water with toxic chemicals designed in a laboratory to imitate what you really want. Like veggie-burgers. Or fat-free bacon. Or Kenny G.
Either drink the real thing, or don’t. Faking it is…well, faking it.
This is – um – weird. I opened this thread, went out, bought some of the soft drink in question, and came back to read this.
I have not tasted it yet.
I … kind of … want to, now.
I’m not clear on whether you liked this drink or not. Maybe you should try this free can I’m teleporting to you and get back to us, kay?
Well, no, not for me. You see, I hate the taste of water. Thus, diet soda cover up the nasty taste of water with a sweet taste- at least for me. And, there’s no added calories to add to my weight.
To me, the whole point of soda is to cover up the nasty tatse of water. But- I am strange. 
You missed “citric assid”.
I burning your dog shit delight!
That was an outstanding OP!
I must point out, however, that your first mistake was purchasing a Pepsi product. Blech.
Okay, I tried one today at the university, and I thought it tasted like flat wild cherry soda mixed with flat Dr Pepper. But perhaps over time I have become inured to feculence.