Regarding pedis: Not really fond of those either - usually there’s scraping/pushing near the nail bed that hurts (from what I’ve been told, it shouldn’t if done well) and attempts at foot massage usually hit some tendon or muscle on the bottom of the foot that is uncomfortable.
My only professional massage was kinda a trade deal with a customer who owned a massage place. I had been doing work there on and off for a couple years so all the girls know me and such. The boss asked if I had ever had a massage…I replied no.
He said to pick one of the girls and we could do a trade. All of the girls looked like “pick me” and not wanting to hurt anyones feelings I said “they all look so wonderful I would have a hard time deciding” a few knowing glances were exchanged and I was directed to go to one of the massage rooms and told to disrobe.
So I go in, I get undressed, hop on the table, laying face down. Next thing I know all three of them are rubbing me down with hot towels. They spent the next hour working me over quite thoroughly. I left feeling like a million bucks, clean, relaxed and feeling quite adored being the subject of 100% of the attentions of 3 adorable 20something chineese women.
That said, the thing for me was not the massage, but the attention. Someone who is giving you an hour of low grade uninterrupted affection. No kids fighting, no phones ringing, no conditions, no “what about me”. Just an hour of being touched.
I’ve had mixed experiences with professional massages, but they do definitely tend to lend more toward OW!!! than Ooooh. I, like many here, am not terribly keen on the sharp pressure that can be applied.
But those of you who are like me, I suggest a hot stone massage. Good lord was that relaxing and I felt amazing after.
Anywho, my boyfriend is/was a licensed masseuse (went to school and all that, though he works in IT now had has for the last few years). I like his massages mostly because it’s informal and, unlike a fancy spa massage, I can say, “YOW, THAT HURTS!!!” without feeling awkward :D. He says that the reason certain parts hurt is that I don’t get massages frequently enough and, if I did, the pain wouldn’t be there. I thought this was all hooey, but the truth is that since I’ve been getting semi regular massages from him, the pressure does hurt less.
I am not interested in professional massages, but massages from my SO are always welcome.
I’ve never liked massages. Pressure hurts!
Where others like massages for relaxation, I like stretching. If a muscle is tight or sore, I stretch it out and feel much better.
Though I also hate the face cradle I have very tight muscles and I exercise a lot, so deeper massage, the deeper the better, hurts (in a good way though) but leaves me feeling great after. I would like one every day.
A lot of people I know IRL have no use for massage, including my ex. I am trained in massage, would have done it anything, and very occasionally if he was having real pain from neck tension he’d ask me to work on it, but he honestly didn’t enjoy or want it otherwise.
Giving massages to clients, and getting them from other professionals, somehow feels not at all intimate to me. Not sure how it works but it’s absolutely nothing like being touched or touching a sexual partner naked.
I give my wife massages quite regularly, 1-3 times per week, and she adores them. Of course, I’ve 20 years of practice on a single client so I had better get it right! The standard massage includes:
Facial massage
Scalp massage
Neck and Shoulder massage
This thing where I ‘roll’ her head in a circle - really loosens up the neck muscles
This other thing where I grab an arm and rotate it, stretching out the muscles - one can hear the tendons pop
Arm, hand, and finger massages
All the above I do while sitting behind her, while we’re watching TV - we can do this for an hour or two, until I get bored or she falls asleep.
She doesn’t give me massages - not strong enough in her hands to effectively do so. So, for Christmas, she went to Family Leisure and got me one of these, which is awesome. But I’m sure a real person could do better…
It feels uncomfortable and awkward to me. In my old job people (women) were always giving each other massages and the moans of apparent pleasure really made me uncomfortable. I can’t even imagine having a complete stranger touch you so intimately for money*.
I don’t mind them from my SO, but I only like them in short stretches. The stuff JohnT does for his wife would have me squirming away. 
*Really. And prostitution is illegal. It’s hardly any difference!
There’s also a lot of scratching involved…
Oh good. I was starting to get scared that I was the only one here who doesn’t like them from simply being too damn ticklish.
That is a very interesting thought. I do love pedis, manis, etc. I even really like getting my hair done. That feels indulgent to me in the way that I imagine massages feel to people who like them.
Thai massage – and I don’t mean the “happy ending” kind – is supposed to be all the rage, but the times I’ve tried it, it just seemed like a waste of time. Funny thing is that anyone with no training whatsoever can put out a sign in a tourist area that reads “Traditional Thai Massage” and be guaranteed lots of customers who “ooh” and “ahh” over the experience. And traveling through the region, I’ve seen lots of signs reading “Traditional Cambodian Massage,” “Traditional Indonesian Massage” etc, depending on the country, and I’ve never heard of such traditions in many of these cultures.
But I have had traditional massage from people I know to have been properly trained and certified, and it just didn’t do anything for me. I can’t say I “hated” it, but I did find myself bored to tears.
I get professional sports massages about once a month. They are deep tissue, hurt like hell, but when they are done I feel so much better. I’ve had several professional relaxation massages, and I love them as well. It’s hard for me to fathom that so many people don’t like being touched like that. Different squids for different kids, I guess.