Ask a Man

ONE OF US! ONE OF US!

Premature anniverseration?

If that’s the case, then he’s slacking. I still see them all the time, so if you’re serious about making him kill all the spiders (an idea I’m completely behind, incidentally), then you better start nagging more.

I was so embarassed. :frowning:

I can do George Burns and Groucho Marx. How about you?

Ooo! I have questions.

What do you think about women who ask men out on dates?

Why do men think yelling comments at girls who walk by is going to get them any ass? Is this a macho thing?

How do you feel about women who engage in casual sex?

It’s really trampy, unless they’re asking me out. Then it’s totally cool

We don’t. But we also know that not yelling isn’t going to get us any ass either.
“Wow, that smelly construction worker didn’t loudly compliment my nether regions. I must have him now!”

It’s really trampy, unless they’re doing it with me. Then it’s totally cool

Bill Engvall once said men have three needs: Food, Sleep, and Sex. I asked my husband about it and he said, “Pretty much.” Do you agree with that?

I also don’t understand how men can go from beating each other senseless to shaking hands and buying each other a beer. How do you not hold a grudge?

Why do men feel the need to back the car/truck/boat/lawn mower up into a spot rather than just pull in?

I’ve meet one of this women and I had absolutely no problem with it. Now the women who think that just because they bought you a beer allows them total access to my junk, those women are saints.

We are not trying to get ass by yelling comments. Yelling comments does several things. It allows other men in the area to know that there is an attractive woman nearby. Kind of like how one meerkat will stand guard while the others graze or whatever it is that meerkats do for a living, then alerting the group to the appearence of the woman. Also, it acts like a prayer of thanks to the lord, who is hard of hearing in case you didn’t know.

Now some men get very aggressive about it. The way to handle this is simply to turn and say “Let’s go, right now, but when we’re done, I’m coming back and telling all your friends here just how big your dick really is.”
Causal sex? Sounds great, but…

The thing is, we’ll have this idea in the back of our minds that it really isn’t casual. That, later on, you’ll decide that it wasn’t casual. But most men believe in ‘taking what you can get’, and ‘get while the gettings good’ so we’ll put those fears aside and try to enjoy ourselves.

Why are all your toys loud, destructive and messy? (and expensive)

Many thanks for your answers so far.

Do you mind if we borrow your razor to shave our legs?
What do you really think of women who are more experienced than you in bed?

Why should I like your mother?-you don’t like her either!

Well, as I get older I find that I don’t need one of those as much as I did when I was younger. Maybe it’s just me, and I certainly wouldn’t want to put anyone else down by admitting this. Heck, I probably never would have believed it if someone told a 21 year old me that I’d be happy getting 6 hours of sleep a night.
The food and sex are still just as important.

I don’t understand the question. Why do chicks hold grudges all the time, anyway?
Beer? Grab me one, would ya?

Just in case we need to make a quick getaway.
Zebra, ivylass said something about beer. Grab one on me for jumping all over your thread.

Q1. They’re just better that way, plus everyone knows we have them which is a plus.

Q2. Being gay I have no experience in this regard but I have sensitive skin, so I like a razor slightly dulled. New ones cut me up badly.

Q3. Sexual experience is a good thing, practice makes perfect I’ve always said. That being said, we don’t want to know details of that experience. But having it can be a good thing.

Q4. She may not be perfect and I may not always like her…but she’s still Mom. Heck, I don’t always even “like” my SO but I still expect my Mom to show a minimum level of respect to him.

Some of this stuff girls do too. All of my toys are loud, messy and expensive. (Heh.) And you rarely catch me holding a grudge!

  • Is the best way to a man’s heart through his stomach?

  • I hate the phrase “We need to talk” as much as you do. And most of the time I will just launch into whatever I need to say. But sometimes I really do need to have a serious talk - non-accusatory, just maybe I need to share something - and I need to know how best to get you to shift your gears. What’s a good way without coming off as attacking?

  • How do you feel when chicks hit on you - not necessarily because they want to go out with you, but just in an admiring sort of way? Or even just say something simple like “You’re cute/sexy/you have nice eyes.”

  • More later!

Do you need more than Food Sleep and Sex? For basic needs, that and a roof over your head will cover the most basic of needs. But we sure as hell WANT other stuff.

There are times when you hold a grudge and times when you don’t. Most of the time you don’t need to hold a grudge, however, occasionally, there will be someone put on the list and they will never come off the list. So it is possible to throw a punch at someone, wrassle a bit, and then come up smiling. It’s just blowing off steam because we do tend to bottle things up. But a grudge is a very serious thing.

Promise not to laugh?

Did you ever watch Batman? Does Batman ever, EVER, hop in the Batmobil and then back out of the driveway, then reverse to go to fight the Joker? No he does not. A man knows that a some point, the alarm will sound and he’ll need to hop in the Batmobil, BatBoat, BatMower and go fight crime and when that happens, he has to be able to just take off.

Now, you’ve missed some key issues here.

  1. Finishing the OJ means dealing with the empty OJ container. That might actually involve rinsing it out in some cases, and will definitely involve evaluating whether this is one of those cases. Just not being a pig about it and leaving some jusice for someone else (someone not very thristy) relieves you of the need to do this.

  2. There is a limit to how much OJ you can drink before you have to get a glass. And no one wants to do that.

Toys! These are TOOLS! And I am going to build something really great with them that is much better than that IKEA crap, but as long as you’re going maybe we could buy a workbench.
Why is it, I can shave my face for two weeks without changing the blades, but one trip on your legs destroys the blades? If you use the razor, just toss the blade and put in a new one without tell me. I really like shaved, legs. So as long as you are shaving them for me, it isn’t so bad.
More experienced? In bed? We feel intimidated, and grateful, which is not a pleasant mix, so put on that police woman costume to distract me.

You have to like my mother because she is SAINT! A mean, cruel, and judgemental saint but a SAINT just the same. Seriously, would you like to hang out with Jesus?

A little lower, sweatheart.

“We need to talk about our vacation plans.”

I like it.

Bah. Trust Anaamika to make this point. :mad:

:wink:

It’d help, but then I imagine the reverse is true. I think it’s as much the attractiveness of knowledge as the good food. People who know their way around something are always more impressive.

Maybe work through to it from a different conversation? Sort of “Oh, hey, while we’re talking about that, there’s also this thing i’ve been thinking about, what do you reckon?”. I suppose the downside to that is that it could be taken as flippant… but that can be easily solved by threatening bodily harm.

Spawn of Satan, of course. I mean, you can say things like that while not hitting on someone, but it can be tricky, and sometimes the ambiguity is worse. If they’re properly hitting on you but have no interest in going out with you, then I call shenanigans.