Ask the breastfeeding mom

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

I also pumped at work. One thing that really surprised me, though - I work full-time for a Fortune 500 and us lactating moms had to use a bathroom to pump. I can’t think of much that’s more disgusting than having to pull up a chair with one knee touching the toilet and the other the sink while trying to prop a book on the edge of the sink to help me ignore the stench of someone else’s recently-laid shit. Even though the place was well-known to be the only lactation room in the company, people would go in there and lie down if they were sick (I once walked in during my allotted time to find someone vomiting in the toilet) or would go in with a magazine to take their daily dump. Thankfully we now have a legitimate lactation room, not that I’ve ever used it since I haven’t been pregnant since it was converted. I also stored my milk in either the company freezer or fridge - I’d stick it in a lunch bag so it wouldn’t freak anyone out.

Anyway, my son had no trouble taking the bottle - I supplemented, so he was used to it from an early age.

22

Did you have any trouble getting nursing working out properly with any of your kids? if so, did you have good access to help?

I forget whether you at “at home” or back in the workforce: if the latter, do / did you pump during the work day? How’d that work out?

Do you see any obvious long-term health differences in the kids who’ve nursed different lengths of time? The only ones I see now are: Dweezil (who nursed 28 months) has very, very rarely had diarrhea. Moon Unit had it more often as a young kid. Also Dweezil is more slender than Moon Unit. May be no connection in either case.

Did WhatsitJr recognize what you were doing when nursing #2? Dweezil did and actually asked for “dweezil-chow” once; as I had no interest in tandem nursing, I distracted him and he never asked again.

I nursed both kids. Dweezil from birth until about 28 months (where I was 4 months pregnant with Moon Unit), and Moon Unit until she was about 13 months. Dweezil was gradually losing interest, and hadn’t been getting any milk, I imagine, for a month or two; it was more about the comfort. He actually decided he was done.

Fortunately with Dweezil, he was full term, and had zero problems figuring things out. I wouldn’t have had any clue where to go for help, otherwise. Also he had pretty severe sleep issues (worse than any other infant I’ve heard of, honestly) 24/7 colic, and the only times he would shut up were when he was nursing, or when he was being driven in the car. Certainly by the time he was 10ish months old he was getting the majority of calories elsewhere but it was sure nice to have that weapon in my arsenal. Also when he was about 14 months old, he had some sort of tummy virus that meant everything he ate was returned with interest 15 minutes later; for several days all he could keep down was breastmilk. Pretty weird to see those poops in a toddler!

Moon Unit was quite an adventure. 6 weeks premature, hospital staff lecturing me on how “nipple confusion” was a myth; not allowed to even attempt to nurse her until 9 days old, she had zero interest in it at first, rarely latched… thank heaven I knew what a proper latch felt like! Also got conflicting information from all the lactation consultants (2 at the hospital, 1 private) I saw. I even tried a “supplemental nutrition system” that has you tape tubes to the boobs - seriously - which made things worse.

What ultimately worked? Something I’d stumbled across on the internet while on bedrest. Take that same SNS. Tape it to your little finger. Stick the little finger in baby’s mouth, nail-side down, pad up against roof of mouth. Jiggle finger to encourage baby to suck. In my case, I had the little bottle around my neck, and when I felt her sucking properly, I used my chin (gawd, I needed 4 hands) to press on the bottle to reward her for sucking. Within 24 hours, she was nursing from the breast and getting all her nutrition from the source. It was that dramatic.

Since we were dealing with major household stress (Dweezil’s autism diagnosis) by self-medicating with Breyer’s ice cream, I was giving hi-test milk, and once Moon Unit figured out the nursing, she started putting on the pounds in a real hurry.

She nursed until 13 months, when she caught a cold and went on a nursing strike. I continued to pump for about a month, but wasn’t getting much and she had no interest in getting back to it. Otherwise I’d have gone longer with her.

23

My pump came with an insulated bag and ice thingy that we freeze in advance, so the milk stays cool until I get it home and into the fridge. Also, breast milk is safe to leave at room temperature for a few hours.

I pump at my desk – I work in a very small, women-only office, and I put up a curtain for privacy. It’s great, because I have my iPod there already and I can look at all the pictures of him on Flickr to help with let-down. I hate pumping, and I don’t usually get good results from it. Part of it, I know, is that I only work in the office 2 days/week (I work from home the rest of the time), so I don’t have to pump every day. I think if I did, my body would get used to that stimulation and produce more. It’s really nice now that the baby’s eating some solid food, because that takes some of the pressure off me.

We had some trouble getting started with breastfeeding. J was born a couple weeks early – he was full term, but still a little immature. He was much more interested in sleeping than in eating, and I think he also has a high palate (this matters because babies are born with the “rooting” reflex, so they can find the nipple and get it into their mouths, but the “keep sucking!” reflex is tied to palate stimulation. Because of his high palate, the nipple wasn’t triggering that reflex, so he would suck a couple of times and then unlatch and cry because he was hungry.). We stayed in the hospital an extra day or so because of this, and went back to the birth center a few times after we were discharged, to get help from the nurses/lactation consultants there. In the meantime, I was pumping so my milk would come in, and we were trying to feed him the pumped milk (well, colostrum, anyway) and a little formula through an SNS – the little tube that Mama Zappa mentioned. He was 4 days old before we finally made breastfeeding work, and it was such a relief! Plus, milk-drunk babies are funny. :slight_smile:

24

I had no success pumping with the first baby, but fantastic success with the second one. So either I was doing it better or else my breasts got the idea. With both children, I produced copious amounts and considered changing my name to Elsie or Bessie.

Regarding soreness, I can’t recall where I read the tip to toughen up my nipples with a washcloth while in the shower, but that’s what I did and it really helped. I did have a couple of incidents of clogged ducts with the first one. That hurt and the advice is to nurse through it so the clog gets unclogged and you don’t end up with an infection. So yes, there was some discomfort but only really due to the clogs I had.

I will also say that I loved not being weighed down with bottles and formula whenever we would go out or on trips or whatever. Just a very small diaper bag with essentially just diapers–such freedom.

25

It hasn’t really affected our sex life to speak of. Interestingly (because I know a lot of women have the opposite experience) I did enjoy having more attention paid to that area, after I had Whatsit Jr. I was never really that into it before. I think it’s because they became more sensitive. And, luckily MrWhatsit has not been squeamish about the occasional leakage or whatnot. Aaaaand, with that, I’ve officially exceeded my Things I’m Willing To Share On the SDMB comfort zone for this question!

N/A. I never actually went back to the office. I’ve been telecommuting from home since Whatsit Jr. was about 3 months old.

Breastfeeding Whatsit Jr. (my oldest) was a total complete freaking nightmare for the first several weeks. He just couldn’t quite seem to figure out how to latch onto the breast properly. I could only get him on with the help of the lactation consultant at the hospital, and as soon as she was gone, it was back to crying and refusing to latch on. The LC finally gave me a contraband nipple shield (kind of like a plastic nipple that you fit over your real nipple, to help the baby suck properly) which allowed me to breastfeed, although was obviously suboptimal. It took me about 3-4 weeks to wean Whatsit Jr. from the nipple shield, and just about the time we had it figured out, he came down with a whomping case of RSV that led to an opportunistic MRSA pneumonia, and he was hospitalized on a ventilator from the time he was 4-6 weeks old. This did not help with the breastfeeding issues, to put it mildly. However, once he was recovered and back home again, we got back on the horse, so to speak, and by the time he was 3 months old, nursing was going really well, and I was glad I’d stuck with it.

That is interesting. I haven’t noticed any real difference, no. Whatsit Jr. has mild asthma, but the docs think it’s probably a result of the RSV/pneumonia he had early on. MiniWhatsit, who actually nursed longer, had persistent fluid in her ears throughout toddlerhood. So I haven’t noticed any real difference in health between them, no.

He had been fully weaned for about 6 months when MiniWhatsit came along, and he was cool about it. He seemed moderately interested in what I was doing at first, but then kind of shrugged it off and moved on. He never made any moves on his baby sister’s territory, or anything. :slight_smile:

26

Seriously. I throw a couple of diapers and a baggie of wipes in my backpack and we’re good to go.

27

I think I’ve heard that phrase - “milk-drunk” - before, but I’m not sure what it refers to. Could you explain? It sure sounds funny.

ETA: All right, prurient interest taking over here: have you tried your own breastmilk? What does it taste like?

28

Sometimes when a baby has had a good feeding, they’ll kind of pop off the breast with this woozy, glazed look in their eyes, and the biggest, goofiest grin. Sometimes with milk drool coming out of the mouth. It looks exactly like you would imagine a drunken sailor to look. It’s pretty hilarious.

I tried my own breastmilk a couple of times, out of curiosity. It was sweet and kind of watery. Like melted fro-yo.

29

I found my milk to be pretty sweet, almost like coconut milk. And yes, a milk-drunk baby is very hilarious (as well as heart-warming) to see.

30

I nursed both my kids (who are now 8 and 6) for abotu 18 months and about 2 years respectively. This issue – about access to help and experience --is one that I was entirely blind to. I nursed my kids because my mother nursed her kids, my grandmother nursed her kids, my aunties nursed their kids, my cousins…well, you get my drift. It is also why I used cloth diapers and coslept.

It is funny how things change – my relatives did these things mostly because they were working class at best and couldn’t afford to do anything else. By the time I came along, these things were no longer the province of the working class.

Anyhoo, when I had a problem I called one of my many family and if they didn’t know they asked each other and got back to me. I had a sum total of years of nursing experience at easy reach – not to mention support for nursing. It was our default. I found it sort of jarring to discover friends who were the first to nurse a child in living memory in their families, or whose families (or even their medical advisors, who ought to know better) were opposed to the notion.

31

Eldest weaned himself starting at about 12 months, it took him until 18 months to give up bedtime nursing. I then adopted the child-led weaning philosophy. It was gradual, natural, it unfolded like a lovely flower. Then I had Youngest, who went to morning and evening feedings and showed no signs of giving those two up. Eventually Youngest drove me to reconsider: I now think that – as in any relationship, really – if either half of the nursing relationship is ready to give it up, it’s time.

32

I am 8 months pregnant and my colostrum has already come in, so I feel I’m unlikely to have “issues”. I don’t have many experienced women around to ask for help if problems do come up, but part of me figures that if I do have problems, well, that’s what the internet is for! However, there are many breastfeeding educational tools being offered to first-time mothers these days - prenatal classes, books, videos, etc. Do you recommend any in particular, or are these not really necessary? Should I spend money and time on an educational tool? If so, any recommendations regarding classes, books, websites?

And also: do you have any advice for first-time moms?

33

I’m not the OP, but did want to comment on “unlikely to have issues” - it can be the baby who has trouble figuring things out, even if the mother’s supply is OK. As with my Moon Unit: I had no supply problems, had no problems with nursing my first kid, but she had a lot of trouble figuring out how to eat.

I don’t know that I’d spend money on anything right now. The hospital you deliver in will certainly have some lactation consultant resources, and there are private ones as well, if you do have any issues. Certainly read websites etc. for now. La Leche League has a lot of good info but the individual groups, from what I’ve heard, vary widely from “all women should breastfeed no matter what and you’re a failure if you don’t” to very supportive and helpful and understanding.

34

In the linked video above, they joke about how the husband asks to “get in on the action”. Is that totally outside of the norm?

35

Ghanima: if your hospital/birthing center/whatever offers breastfeeding classes, TAKE THEM. Some moms & babies get it right away, but a lot don’t, and it’s got a bigger learning curve than you think.

At the hospital where I had J, many of the nurses are also Certified Lactation Consultants, so that was really helpful – see if that’s the case at your L&D. That was so great, because I could go back there when we had major issues (it also helps that we live really close to that hospital). If not, find a La Leche League chapter near you, and go to some of their meetings. If that’s not your thing (and, I admit, it wasn’t mine), at least use their website to find some Lactation Consultants in your area, and put their numbers by the phone. My local La Leche League also has a 24-hour helpline; see if yours does. That way, if you get home from the hospital and are having trouble breastfeeding, your partner can say, “Here, honey, let me call the Lactaction Consultant for you,” instead of “Here, honey, let me make the baby a bottle.” Sometimes, that kind of support makes a huge difference!

Also, remember that it doesn’t have to be all-or-nothing; if you have a hard time getting started with breastfeeding, that doesn’t mean that you can’t do it at all and your baby has to have only formula. You can pump and bottle-feed, or nurse as you can and supplement with formula. That said, it’s worth it to give breastfeeding the best chance you can. If you can, try to find out in advance how pro-breastfeeding your L&D is; it can help to know if you’ll be getting lots of BF support or not.

Four nursing-related things to buy before you have your baby: a nursing bra (only get one beforehand, because you don’t know yet what sort of size you’ll be when you’re no longer pregnant – they sell decent but cheap ones at Motherhood Maternity, if you can stomach their awful return policies), a Boppy or other breastfeeding pillow, some disposable breast pads (you can get non-disposable ones later, if you need them), and some Lansinoh or other lanolin nipple cream (but NOT Mommy’s Bliss Nipple Cream, because the FDA recently released warnings about that one).

A couple of other helpful things to know: newborns eat every 2-3 hours on average, from beginning of nursing session to the beginning of the next one. And some babies will take an hour each session. So you might want to stock up on books or DVDs! When they’re hungry, most babies’ cries sound like, “mmmmm! mmmmm!” more than “waaa! waaa!” so if you hear cries with an M sound, try sticking your boob in his/her mouth. :wink:

Two other products that I found/find helpful: an Itzbeen Timer , because you will have no brain once that baby arrives. It helps you keep track of how long it’s been since you changed the baby, fed the baby, how long he’s been asleep, whatever. It’s great! Especially in the middle of the night . The other thing is a website that lets you track your baby’s everything: sleeping, eating, diapers, bottles, whatever. It’s Trixie Tracker , and it can help you see patterns that you might not have noticed otherwise. I’d be happy to go on at length about both of these if anyone wants. :slight_smile:

Oh, and for before you even get to nursing, there’s a FABULOUS book about labor that I have to recommend: The Big Book of Birth . It’s very detailed and very positive, and I was so glad it came out before I had my baby!

36

Excellent advice given by other posters so far. My contribution is to add that I do think it’s helpful to read up as much as possible beforehand, but understand that you still might run into problems getting the baby to latch on properly or whatnot. A trained lactation consultant is worth her weight in gold. If you have a choice in which hospital you’re delivering at, see if you can find out how many LCs they have on staff and what their availability is like. The hospital I most recently delivered at had LCs, but only during daytime business hours, and only by appointment. This was suboptimal, to say the least. (“Hi, I can’t figure out how to feed my baby; can you come by six hours from now to help me out?”)

So That’s What They’re For! is a more lighthearted (but still informative) take on breastfeeding, if you want a book recommendation. For a heavier reference, try The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, which I believe is put out by the La Leche League. Oh, and do consider checking out your local LLL meeting. The caliber and tone of these meetings varies wildly by individual chapter, but the one I used to go to in Seattle was a lot of fun and I met some friends there. They welcome pregnant women, fyi.

37

OK, this is a question for all my fellow breastfeeders - particularly anyone who’se watched a number of those infomational videos on “how it’s done”

Is it just me, or does anyone find the models featured a bit … well, abnormally normal, if you see what I mean? Like they’ve all got somewhere between a C and a D cup, nice brown sharply defined aureolas and perky nipples. All of them.

I was watching one vid in particular when I went in with Number 3 to see about getting his tongue-tie snipped (totally a good idea, by the way) and I’m watching this lady line her baby’s mouth up precisely on the edge of an aureola that looks like it’s been painted on and flip her nice perky (but soft and pliable) nipple into his mouth and I’m thinking well that’s nice but here I am with Size G megaboobies (that’s an H for US/UK sizes), aureolas that don’t even have an “edge” and nipples that believe that “standing up” means “well a few millimetres above the breastline is good enough”.

Anyone else think a bit more diversity in images would be a nice idea?

(I’m a big fan of personalised one-on-one help, myself. And interestingly, the post above notwithstanding, I’ve never had any significant problems with feeding, even though I do almost everything “wrong” according to conventional wisdom)

38

So true. My elder son ate constantly and never slept more than 2 hours straight for the first six months. I felt like I’d moved the pregnancy from my uterus to my boob. I got VERY good at reading one-handed and turning pages with my thumb.

Don’t be alarmed, though, if you end up having a baby that doesn’t eat as frequently. My younger son was on a more typical nursing cycle (two to three hours apart but fairly long sessions). My sis, on the other hand, had to urge her baby to eat, and wake her up at regular intervals during the day and at night to ensure the baby got enough milk.

Guess the best way to sum all this up is this: normal ranges means half of the babies are less than that and half are more. So don’t flip out if your’s isn’t exactly “normal.”

39

Oh gawd, yes. Are you me? I can’t tell you how many times I had to wipe food from my son’s head, because the only way he’d shut up long enough for me to eat was if I latched him on and ate one-handed.

It actually got to the point where I wanted him nursing all the time - not that he was lacking in food, but if he was latched on, he wasn’t screaming… those being his only two states (see reference to severe sleep issues). Once I learned to nurse lying down, where I could drowse while he fed, this was actually pretty cool.

40

Another little tidbit of advice I wish someone had given me (and that I figured out on my own) was not to feel guilty if breastfeeding doesn’t work out perfectly for you. Breastfeeding was one of those promises I made to myself - you know, “My baby will never taste formula!” Then I had eclampsia, low milk production thanks to no nutrition (they don’t generally let you eat for about 4 days after the eclampsia; I couldn’t eat for about 2 1/2 weeks thanks to the migraine) and consequently my son lost too much weight in the first couple of weeks and had to be supplemented with formula.

I can’t describe to you what a failure I felt like when I had to put him on formula. Whatever you do, try not to let yourself feel guilty especially about things over which you have no control. Trust me, people will do their best to make you feel like a crappy parent because they disagree with you (that old “If you’re right I must be wrong” syndrome) - don’t pile it on yourself.