Will I get a promotion on December 29th?
Sorry, SanguineSpider, “what’s his name” isn’t a yes-or-no question!
Taters: Sorry. MY REPLY IS NO 
My question for Magic 8 Ball(or magic conch)
Are you accurate?
vanilla: WITHOUT A DOUBT
Eightball:
Is Cecil Adams really a mouse?
Gadfly: MOST LIKELY
(I’m going to have to dig out my Douglas Adams books. 
)
Magic 8 Ball:
WIll I get a job this year?
vanilla: IT IS CERTAIN
<Check your email>
Oh wait, Magic 8 Ball, was if6was9 refering to me when he asked about the nice woman?
I am a woman, and I am nice
Will I ever fall in love again? please please pleeeeease?
misstee: REPLY HAZY TRY AGAIN LATER
Amy881: MOST LIKELY
Am I being watched?
green_bladder: DON’T COUNT ON IT
“Magic 8 Ball, will I be offered a job at [the company that laid me off] in Costa Mesa?”
YES DEFINITELY
“Magic 8 Ball, should I take the job when it’s offered?”
SIGNS POINT TO YES
“Magic 8 Ball, will Weyerhaeuser offer me a job?”
WITHOUT A DOUBT
Magic 8 Ball, should I accept a job offer from Weyerhaeuser?"
AS I SEE IT YES
Uh oh.
You’ve got to remember to use your powers for the benefit of humankind, Johnny!
You are a woman and you are nice, but you haven’t stopped e-mailing me… yet. 
O, great and magic eight ball! Will thou tellest me if I shall eateth a poison pickle this coming weekend and die-eth an untimely death?
still kneeling reverently
SanguineSpider: MY SOURCES SAY NO
Oh all-seeing magic 8 ball - will I sell my house before I have to move?
No promotion?! But I DESERVE it! That extra eight grand a year would be nice too!
I’d say your Magic Ball isn’t so magic for me. However, my DAUGHTER’S Magic 8 Ball says “It is decidedly so”.
Good thing I don’t believe in that stuff, otherwise which one would I believe?