Sofa - maybe the anti-abortion/baby seal sticker was about eugenics or one of those anachronistic thalidomide baby jokes.
Here in PA we had a slogan that was inscribed on the license plates. Across the top was “You’ve got a friend in” and across the bottom “Pennsylvania” Shortly there after came the plates that had the same format but instead of the plate number they had, in the same sized letters, “JESUS”
I’ve always read that as “You’ve got a friend in JESUS Pennsylvania” and wondered where in the state that was. 
I always thought that meant “Who Wants Jack Daniels?”
I have also seen:
WWXD? - ‘What Would Xena Do?’
and
WWCD? - ‘What Would Cthulu Do?’
(Obvious answer to the second - Anything he wants! I am not about to argue with him!)
I’ve got that beat: In one of the malls in my town there’s a Christian bookstore called “S&M Books.”
I’ve also seen a bumper sticker that said:
HWJD
How Would Jesus Drive?
Real men love Jesus
That one still cracks me up.
I saw one this morning on my way to the office - not a bumper sticker, but a sign in front of a church where one finds such “thought provoking” sayings:
“Even Darwin believes now”
I drove by shaking my head. Now THERE’S a congregation I’ll join… Oh, am I being sarcastic again??
I like the response to In case of rapture, this car will be unmanned.
In case of rapture, can I have your car?
:)TN*Hippie
I’ve seen all the stickers mentioned here, and I HAVE a Darwin fish on my car (pure self-defense!) but must mention a tshirt a classmate of mine wears fairly frequently. I’m not sure whether to be amused or horrified:
Romania for Christ or Bust!
I haven’t worked up the nerve to ask him the origin of this shirt because I really don’t want to get him going on religion, since he seems to be so normal otherwise. I’m guessing he got it on some church trip. The ARROGANCE…
some creepy fundie beotch in my building has a sticker on her car reading: Truth! not tolerance, illustrated with a large glowing (flaming?) cross…Cree-py!
I saw this in another thread, I want a bumber sticker that says - What Would Scooby Do?
That’s not a Christian sticker, that’s a 12-step sticker that more or less sums up the first 3 steps.
On a related note, I was standing behind a woman whose bun was held in place by an “I (heart) Jesus” hairbow. Gag!
Robin
Not exactly a Christian bumper sticker, but most likely to be found on Christian-owned cars:
“Half of the patients who enter an abortion clinic come out dead!”
My immediate reaction was “All of the patients who enter a morgue come out dead. What’s your point?”
I hate bumper stickers of all sorts, but bible thumping bumpering is arguable the worst. Why the hell do think I’ll be amused by your little witticisms? Can’t you see I’m trying to pass your lard ass before you swerve into my lane and kill me while you blab on the cell phone? I’d be at least slightly impressed if, instead of buying something off the shelf, you made up your own and etched it into your bumper with a dremel. I’m still waiting to see: Christ, the other other white meat
In western NY, hockey fans will be familiar with Jesus saves, Satan scores, referring to a player by that name (but pronounced Sa TAN). Just clever and blasphemous enough to elicit a chuckle the first time I saw it.
Maybe “Yo quiero Jesus” isn’t about Jesus Christ at all, but some chef named Jesus whose authentic Mexican food has swayed Tiny from his Taco Bell ways…
Well, it was worth a shot.
I have the Eye of Horus on the back of the Fergmobile.
I pass a lot of churches during the completion of my appointed rounds, and I’ve seen plenty of these little homilies on their marquees (is that what they’re called?!) out front. I usually shake my head at the banality of them. I mean, if people are really interested in what’s going on at the church, wouldn’t posting the time of the Sunday Worship Service be of more value?
Anyhoo, the one that really makes me shake my head and feel good about not belonging to that congregation is the one that reads “For all you do, His blood’s for you.”
sheesh
Yeah, but were the bumper stickers on the Christler Jehovan?
How about everyone else here who is speaking against Christians? They don’t look much better in my opinion.
“God used to be my co-pilot, then I traded seats.”
I saw this one and nearly wrecked. The original was pretentious enough to induce nausea, but this one generated a near-case of projectile diarrhea.
“I hate bumper stickers of all sorts . . . Why the hell do think I’ll be amused by your little witticisms?”
—I’m with Waverly on this one. If I don’t care what you, a total stranger, thinks, why do you think I care about the opinion of your car or your T-shirt? “Ooooh! That car’s owner [voted for Bush] [hearts its dog-head] [has an honor-roll son] [admires a sports team] [misses its ex but will aim better next time]. My life is SO much richer for knowing that, and I SO admire this car’s owner!”