That may be, but a truly perfect thread would have enough Chicagocentrism to have a post pointing out that the song was written by the late, great Steve Goodman.
Ummmm…
[getting on pulpit]
Have all of you accepted Jesus as your own personal savior… 'cause if not I can go one for 10-20 pages at least about song lyrics, the dangers of flirting, and how you are all sad beings for not being as cool as I am.
[getting off pulpit]
You also need one of these:
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[ IRISH SPRING ]
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(smacking my head) It’s a box darnit
D’oh (any good thread needs a Simpson’s reference.)
Never TMI, never gratuitous, always welcome. 
[sub]but that “innocent look” ain’t foolin US, honey…[/sub]
Terribly sorry. Here, let me see if I can make it… better.
Handfuls are very nice, too. Just wanted to make sure the the “big breast” crowd didn’t leave anyone out. “A” and smaller are also welcome! Breasts in general are welcome! The more, the merrier! Oh, and more beer! [sub]Can we have some erect nipple beer or gun beer?[/sub]
:::Looks around:::
Hey! WHERE ARE THE LEGS??
Or not. Little perkies are just fine, too.
I’d like to point out that I have NOT received emails with pics of boobies yet!
and I thank you for your support… or lack thereof.
GrizzRich, I would send you pictures of my bare naked breasts with erect nipples, but the photo-developing place tells me that they always come out ‘over-exposed’ and that I should try again.
Tranquilis - I have legs. Long, smooth, well-toned, shapely legs. They start at my hips and stretch all the way down to the floor, ending in perfectly polished toenails - making a detour through my 3" heeled mules.
Coldfire bashing - I don’t think I have anything bad to say about him… how about this, though:
Neil Peart is a big turnip! Geddy Lee sucks his toes!
Woo HOOooo…! NOW we’re talking perfection!
Roll baby, roll! Roll on, Perfect Thread!
I can take it all. Har-dee-fuckin’-har, The Netherlands are twice as big as Joisey. Big friggin’ deal. Woohoo, Rush sucks ass! And then some!
As if I care. I mean, REALLY.
But… but…
See you in the motherlovin’ Pit, pal. That’s like saying George Washington had pubic lice and masturbated to charcoal drawings of limping donkeys with diarhea.
::gulps in self-abnegation::
OH…MY…GOD did I ever blow that one! Particularly when it says right there in the middle of the freakin’ recitation that it was written by Steve Goodman.
jmonster you are dead on right, and I bow before you. Um, I suppose, you know, that an ultimate thread would have someone getting totally nailed on an error and apologizing thoroughly, throwing himself on the mercy of the assembled Dopers [sub]I’m so ashamed[/sub]
NOW it’s the perfect thread.
I personally am not drunk enough for that yet…you can try asking me again later, though. You will note, however, that I did issue a call for lesbianism in general, which certainly includes, but is not limited to, flirting.
:sits down at the keyboard–nekkid and contemplates her large breasts and thinks "I don’t think it’s that unusal to have natural 40DD breasts. They may be tan, firm and proud but amazing and perfect? I don’t know about that. All I know is that they are hot, I think I may have sunburned them just a little at the same time I set my ass on fire:
:takes an ice cube in each hand and runs them over her perfect pierced nipples until they are wicked hard enough to cut glass, mmmmmm that’s better:
:slowly crosses and uncrosses her well-toned legs occassionally revealing a glimpse of her fresh Brazilian treated pubic area:
:thinks how much her husband’s shotgun reminds her of some of the dopers–they are always long and hard, well oiled, ready for action, smell so sexy and feel so good in your hand:
:silently curses Coldfire—Damn him he never notices me, Doesn’t he know how f**king sexy he is? Doesn’t he know how hot it makes me just to see his name on screen? What is is he blind? What do I have to do to make him notice me? (sobbing)Damn him Damn him straight to heck:
:decides to forgo the penis beer and instead has a Dicken’s Cider. Thinking you know the slogan really is true, you really do feel better once you’ve had your Dicken’s cider. I think I like hot Dicken’s Cider best of all.
There should be a dog riding a tricycle and wearing some funny Groucho Marx glasses. Those are silly!
::Bump::
Who the hell is Neil Peart?
[sub]Oh, wait, he’s probably one of those Rush people.[/sub]
Yeah. Geddy Lee, Neal Peart, Alex Lifeson. Rush. Best thing to come out of Canada musically in a long time.
Then came The Tragically Hip.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by iampunha *
He’s only the world’s best drummer. 
[sub] No that’s not a suckup to Coldy. He IS the best drummer. [/sub]