Monday, after an Easter spent getting told how I needed to do something about my hair. (My hair is very long, I can sit on it) I made the call. Oh, yes they would be glad to see me Weds. at 5pm. Last appointment of the day. She knows I don’t like crowds. She knows I haven’t cut my hair in over 20yrs. As they say only your hairdresser knows for sure. She’s a trusted semi-friend. Mainly because I’ve given her umpteen $$$ for the lil’wrekkers many appointments.
So…I get in the Orange Menace and head to town. I have plenty of time. Time to kill, you might say. God, I wish I was dead. I do not want to do this. I hate this. Why folks (my daughters and DIL) just don’t leave me alone?
I stop before I get to the infamous explosion site. That’s the point where I can turn back before I’m too far down the road. And it still make sense. Well, to me it makes sense.
I have my phone pulled up on the screen in the dash. I’m looking at who I can call, in my contacts that can maybe talk me through this. Not my girls, nope they’ll just be miffed. Not Mr.Wrekker, he hasn’t got an opinion on my hair. Who to call? My finger is about to push call, when my phone rings it’s the beauty shop. She asks can I come later, she’s running behind. I answer 'no so fast she apologized to me. I said; “no let’s just reschedule”
Oh, thank god, I don’t have to go. I make a big uhey and go home. I’m so relieved, I can’t tell you.
My new appointment is next Tuesday. I’ve got 6 days to work myself up to it. I may take my dental valium. No, not for the appointment, for when the lil’wrekker finds out I didn’t have my hair cut today. I’m in big, big, big trouble.
eh, just tell her this, “when you’re wearing my hair on your head instead of your own, you can have an opinion, now siddown and shaddup junior, Momma has to think”
And say with the sweetest, kindest, most loving mama-shark grin you can muster. (a playfully dangerous glint in your eye is a great addition if you can manage it)
:D;)
Wouldn’t a blog be better?
With a blog she’d be starting from scratch, with no built-in audience. Here she has a (mostly) appreciative audience waiting for her next post.
Dye it. Sedona Oran…
Aw, nevermind.
Yep. Captive audience. My life is a bunch of pointless and mundane stuff. This is the perfect outlet. Sorry if it bugs you. I’ll try to be less pointless and mundane. Maybe I should start posting in the political threads. I do have opinions on that. Or, I could go into pitting folks. Nah. Not mean enough.
So back to thread games for me. Alas, yall won’t get to hear any more boring cat tales or what the lil’wrekker’s up to at college. You wouldn’t believe the latest. Who will I tell if another truck explodes? Oh, well.
Ooh. Orange metallic hair! I could go for that.
If li’l Wrekker says one word, say, “Nice eyelashes. $17 mascara?”
May I ask why you dread having your hair cut? Is it something about the salon or the actual cutting? Or is it that you spent 20 years growing that hair, and it’s painful to think of losing even an inch of it?
PS Don’t stop posting in this thread! I always look forward to reading your “Bad, Bad” posts. If others don’t like them, they can easily skip them.
I don’t know why I have a haircutting fear. Like most of my fear it’s irrational. Grown from some other mental distress, I guess. I can see, logically what’s needed but I panic and have severe anxiety. I can eventually work up to most anything, so far. I work on it everyday. When I start having elaborate plans to do small things it’s easier to just not do it. So things go undone, a bit.
hmmm…no opinion? Well, god bless ‘im for bein’ so easy to get along with!!
But me----if ya ask me,(and I know you want to)---- I know long hair when me sees it…and it looks good on a woman at any age.
Now, my wife… she don’t agree with me, and she ain’t agreed with me for the past 3 decades. So she keeps it short, and I keeps me mouth shut.
But goshdarnit, Beck, after 20 years, why give up on a good thing?
Sure, they say size (or length) doesn’t matter…but it sure don’t do no harm, neither. 
If my proposed cutting of 12 inches happens my hair will still be past my shoulder blades. It will still be long just more managable, so they sez.
Do what I did. Contact the ‘Locks of Love’ people (I actually had somebody do it for me) and have that mane cut off, right down to the scalp and donated to make Merkins for Cancer Kids.
Makes my heart (what there is of it) feel good knowing some kid, somewhere, has a wig made out of my prime ‘Before It Went Grey’ long-ass hair.
Nobody would want my shit now. 
Not even me.
Oh, I’ll donate it. I have to say my hair is a nice thickness and straight as a board. It’s a lovely color, light blond with some silver. If it was junk I’d have went short many years ago. Oh, god, I’m talking myself right out of cutting it. Next time I wash it and it takes hours to dry I’ll hate it again, maybe.
Gato, I spewed my tea thinking about a kid with your hair. I don’t even know what it looked like but it seems like it would be funny, for some reason.
Beck, I have had a ponytail that stretched halfway down my back for the last 20+ years. Until recently. I was offered a very good reason to cut it off.
“Will you cut it?” asked the casting director. “For this chance, sure,” I replied, and headed to the barber. Hey, it will grow back.
If you want to know more, Beck (and only Beck), PM me. It’s an interesting story.
Well, of course I have to know. See you in the PMs.
Gato’s donation idea is brilliant, but what to do with what’s left?
Platinum blonde.
My hair is also very long, for similar reasons: apathy, and dread of having to socialize with the scissor-person. I say don’t cut it!
Maybe if I go short enough I can do a Marilyn Monroe type style. Or even shorter and do Susan Powter. I’ll need to cultivate some extra ‘oomph’ for either one of those. I don’t really see that happening. Hmmmm?
I note that several posters have expressed interesting phobias about haircutting. I suspect it’s not the actual cutting that the’s problem, but just the whole ritual about interacting with the scissors person, giving instructions, concerns about how it will turn out, etc. Far be it for me to scoff – when I moved to a different town many years ago, for a while I would continue to drive a hundred miles (each way) to go back to my familiar haircutter.
My advice, Beck, is to do what you’re comfortable with and don’t take flak from anyone! If you like your hair long, leave it long. The appropriate response to those who explain why you need it to be shorter was well stated by Monty Python: “Piss off!”. Although personally I don’t know how you manage, since caring for hair that long must be a PITA.
Don’t let anyone tell you what to do with your hair! It’s as simple as that. It’s your hair and you wear it how you want. I’m guessing your daughter and DIL wouldn’t ever take hairstyle orders from you.