Post 30 of this thread . I still think that’s brilliant.
There’s always Cervaise’s “I have [a butthole] too, but that doesn’t mean I want a running jigsaw inserted into it.”
“As for ELO, they should have turned down the FRUITY CRAPLOAD knob on their synthesizer once in a while.”
Damn that was funny! 
That sounds very Terry Pratchett-like.
That comes in handy for laughs in real life every once in a while.
Heh. There was a time when I was keeping good quotes in a txt file, but it failed to follow me through a few formats and a new PC. One that I really wish I could find, but I think can get pretty much right, was from DoctorJ I believe, in some thread about a relationship, that went something like this:
“A failed relationship based on mutual love of The Flock is a tale as old as time my friend.”
From the “anyone else drown their sorrows” Valentine’s Day thread:
Somebody was being a jerk one day, and a poster called him on it. The jerk said, “What are you, the goddamned hall monitor?”
To which manhattan replied, “No, I am the goddamned hall monitor!”
and closed the thread.
About two years ago, someone was pitting his unfortunate situation at work/school/whatever. In the course of describing what bad spot he was in, he said this:
IIRC, he took a fair amount of crap for that particular simile.
SolGrundy shares his opinion of vaginas with us in a pit thread on heterosexual guilt:
I forget who uses it as a sig line, but I’ve used it at work on occasion to good effect.
“English doesn’t borrow from other languages. It follows other languages into dark alleys, knocks them down, then rifles through their pockets for loose grammar.”
This gem from Miller on medieval nicknames is awe-inspiring.
Actually the quote was “Who are you, the fucking hall monitor?” manhattan replied “As it so happens, I’m the fucking hall monitor.” He didn’t close the thread, and the OP typed his name as “banhattan,” then insisted that was an accident.
I love Pit monitor Czarcasm’s “Why do other monitors get the masturbatory monkeys, and I get the poo flinging variety?”
I know I’m not remembering this accurately and I’m too lazy to search, but it was a classic, “My hate burns with the fire of a thousand suns”. Or something like that.
That would be petite moi.
I think it was Jack Batty, and he said something like, “Hell, I could probably find a verse in Nostradamus that predicts my jock itch, if I looked hard enough.”
Shit, I just thought of another one-matt_mcl was telling us about the time he and a friend were chatting on the metro and some woman came up to them, and said, “I wonder if you’re aware that freedom from homosexuality is available through the power of Jesus Christ.”
And matt_mcl looks at her and says, “Ma’am, are you aware that freedom from Jesus Christ is available through the power of homosexuality?”
I almost busted a kidney laughing at that one!
The Blimps…the Blimps…
I don’t think that’s exactly it, but lno used something akin to that.
- Shibb, whose hate typically burns with the fury of 1000 christmas lights.
My rage burned with the fire of a thousand suns, and also with the fierceness of overcooked pasta, but that was about it. I raged myself out a couple years ago, and now I’m just simmering on a back burner.
Give me a couple more years and I’ll get back to that point. Raargh.