Between the lines, one of the saddest things I've ever seen

Over the weekend, I saw an obituary for a 13-year-old girl in a nearby town who “died at home” (i.e. she committed suicide). Usually, when a young person dies, there are oodles of online condolences, and that’s just not the case here - just a few notes for her parents, and one of them is from the parents of one of her teachers. None of them mention the girl or even her brother - only condolences aimed at her parents.

I can understand a lack of response for an adult, but a child? Obviously, it looks like something else was going on here. :frowning:

‘Died at home’ is **not **a euphemism for ‘committed suicide’, where on earth did you get that idea?

More likely this child suffered from a long term condition or disability, so whilst she was able to attend ‘school’ on some basis, may not have been able to engage fully with her peers for whatever reason. Hence why no messages of condolence…she may not have had any friends.

I saw something similar. A kid was 14yo, he took some kind of illicit drug and had a seizure and slipped into a coma. He eventually came home in a vegetative state. He lived a few years. When he died they didnt even have a funeral. He was cremated and that was it. I felt sorry for his parents. I slightly knew one of his aunts. She’s never mentioned it, to me. Yeah, it’s sad.

Possibly a severely disabled child who was cared for at home?

Or maybe the family prefers private condolences.

Ninja’d by kambuckta.

No, her list of activities and interests indicated a child of most likely above-average intelligence who attended public school. People who want private condolences would most likely request that the message board be turned off IMHO. It’s always possible that she had a brief illness, but this doesn’t look like it.

Can you give us a link to the obituary?

I’d rather not.

Why not?

If you want us to accept your version of the sadness of the obituary, then the best thing would be to post a cite of it. Simple!

In my experience, when someone dies of suicide or drug overdose, the funeral notice/obituary just says nothing at all about the death.

That sounds terminal.

This isn’t great debates, after all. Feel free to not think it’s sad if that’s what floats your boat.

Perhaps OP feels that posting the obit would reveal too much of their own personal life, like their town or something.

My local newspaper does not give the cause of death unless the family or friends request that they do so. However, I have seen “suicide”, “drug overdose”, “complications of alcoholism”, etc. listed as causes of death.

I’m not posting a link to the obit, or the online condolence board, out of respect for the privacy of this youngster’s family.

We’re discussing this story more extensively on another board, and it just occurred to me that her death may not have been suicide - that she may have been murdered, most likely by her brother, and this information hasn’t been released yet but family and friends know it, and this is why so few people have signed her e-condolence book. Or she may have been an extremely dangerous or troubled child in her own right, and there’s a lot of between-the-lines thinking that this was for the best in the long run. :frowning:

Engaging in convoluted, Greek tragedy-level speculation on the basis of ambiguous scraps of information: Ok.

Posting the obit: Hold on, there are moral standards to uphold!