I was inspired by the thread about our “lists” for potential mates.
The biggest fight(s) I have ever had with my deeply beloved future husband were over gun ownership. The matter nearly tore us apart. Presently, we do have a gun in our house. With a lock and no bullets.
What about you guys?
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Over drug use. An occasional drink or toke is one thing but when it becomes the first thing you do in the morning that’s too much. Especially if you drive while intoxicated. I won’t tolerate that at all.
The moon looks on many flowers, the flowers on but one moon.
Over what to do with a $10,000 inheritance (mine). I had always wanted to visit England, and swore I would use every last penny to do it, and he wanted to buy a motorcycle. He had already owned a motorcycle before, I had never seen England. He decided he would get a motorcycle anyway, over my objections. I threatened to quit my job if all I was doing was working to pay for his toys! It sounds juvenile now, but was heated then. Bottom line: he bought the motorcycle (on payment), and I spend all $10,000 for a 17 day holiday to the UK - and it was worth every last cent, and I have the pictures and memories to prove it. (PS - the motorcycle has since been sold!)
The biggest fight I can think of with my current husband was my decision to keep working, even after he had obtained a good paying job. I told him that if I didn’t work, then I was going back to school or something because just sitting around the house all day with the kids and nothing else to do would drive me completely nuts! God knows I love my kids, but I need to be around other adults too sometimes, and my job allows me to do this.
Of course, now I work from home, so I got my wish to continue working, but I still sit at home all day with the kids and I’m still going nuts. Oh well.
Shadowfox
The biggest fight I ever got into was with my ex (note the word EX).
When my 17 year old was only 3 months old, he got an ear infection. Those of you who are parents know what an ear infection does to an infant. Non-stop crying.
At the time, we had two cars. One that I could drive and the other a piece of shit that had to be hotwired. The dumbass that he is, he lost the only key and instead of calling a locksmith he tore apart the dash and made it so the only way to start the car was with a butter knive and by touching two wires together. I couldn’t start the car.
Early one Saturday morning, we took the baby to the doctor for the ear infection. On the way home, we decided that I would take the baby home and he would go back for the medicine. He dropped us off and then took both checkbooks, the prescription, and the ony car I could drive. I waited and waited and WAITED - still, no sigh of him. I called a friend who happened to have some amoxicillin and with that and some warm compresses, I was able to get my son settled down and sleeping.
But, the more I waited, the more pissed off I became. I had my friend watch my baby and me and my sister went looking for the asshole. We found out that he had ran into his worthless brother and went to shoot pool. Me and my sister, both underage at the time, drove down to the area were there are a lot of bars. We found my car in a large parking lot but could tell which bar he was in.
We started walking up the street, going into each bar (this was a bad part of town) looking for him. Each time we got hassled for ID and hit on by drunks. Hell, we were only 19 and 16 years old, and looked it.
The more I looked, the more pissed off I got. We finally come to a huge biker bar and I see him way in the back shooting pool with his brother. The bouncer tried to get ID from me but I pushed past him and told him I would only be a second. I must have looked bad because he got out of my way. I walked up to my ex and literally dragged his ass outside. The bikers were hoopin and a hollarin and thought it was cool, but I didn’t give a shit.
I got him out on the sidewalk and ripped him a new ass as well as throwing a few punches. He just stood there ducking the blows (he is about twice my size).
Once in the car, I cracked the dash with another punch and then at home I threw the keys at him so hard that they stuck into the door frame.
The combination of a baby crying all day, the age of me and the ex as well as our lack of maturity, and the fact that he was at the bar with his loser brother and didn’t drop of the medicine, made me explode. Later, I was totally humiliated that I put on a public display of beating up my husband in front of a biker bar in a bad part of town.
Jeesh. It is still embarrassing, but you can see why he is my ex-husband.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Coarse and violent nudity. Occasional language.
Playing pool with future hubby in a bar – had a bit too much to drink (both of us) – he didn’t have a good shot on his ball so he hit one of mine. I said something stupid like “don’t you ever hit one of my balls!” He responded by chalking my nose.
I got ticked and went home – he came in about 5 minutes later. The only question was who was going to give in and “be nice” first. We both did.
I love this guy. I had a rotten first marriage (died, but I didn’t kill him) and he had two rotten marriages.
Maturity’s cool. You start to get an inkling of what’s really important. Pool isn’t. People is.
We disagree on some major stuff (he used to be a cop and I used to be a hippie) but we can discuss rationally.
Oh, this is probably a bad idea, but I feel compelled anyway.
We fight about almost everything. Petty things, trivial things, mildly-important-but-not-life-impacting things, and really important things. I couldn’t even tell you what our biggest fight was about, because no matter what we fight about, the vehemence and the yelling and the unwillingness to move or compromise on either of our parts is always the same.
He’s a bum, I’m a nag. He wants to spend half his life sleeping, and evenly divide the other half between vegging in front of the TV, playing video games, reading comics, or playing online. Occasionally he goes out, even more occasionally he includes me. So I let him hear about it. Not that it changes anything, no matter how I approach the subject, but I make sure I tell him (sometimes not very nicely) how f#@king annoyed I’m getting and ask him to kindly get off his ass and be productive.
The biggest problem we’ve had has been surrounding money. I do all the shopping, for clothes, groceries, etc. and he likes to bitch about how much I’ve spent. Of course, he doesn’t mention to me how much money he’s spent on comics at the comic shop or comics he’s won on eBay, because of course, a complete collection of Spiderman comics and collectibles is essential to life whereas clothing and food are not. He makes it sound as though I’m making purchases off the runway for every new designer collection, when in fact, I do all my shopping at Walmart, garage sales, and thrift stores. Logic? Not in his world.
I really could go on and on, but I’ve probably already said more than enough. Next?
Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Coarse and violent nudity. Occasional language.
Not that I don’t feel for you Chris. I think you are married to my ex husband.
>^,^<
KITTEN
Coarse and violent nudity. Occasional language.
Chris:
Sounds perfectly awful! I’d go crazy in a relationship like that. Are you expecting a long future under these conditions???
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
I wish my story wasn’t my doing, but…
I went to my soon to be ex-wifes high school reunion. It was the same school that had kicked me out two weeks before graduation.
I started drinking pretty hard. It seemed a pityful budget for the party and they kept playing some shitty Eagles song over and over again while they watched the dullest slides.
I was standing at the door popping baloons during the slide show with my cigarette. Later I crashed a livlier private party in another bar at the hotel and was having a wonderful time before I was discovered and kicked out.
I decided to go for a swim and stripped of my suit and dived in to the pool to the dismay of some horrified mother and her two kids that were using the pool–I kept my boxer shorts on for pete’s sake–jeez.
A hotel staff member was kind enough to warn me the police were on the way and we walked out the revolving doors as they were walking in.
I apolgized for months in vain until one day I said that I needed to be forgiven and that I was afriad that soon I might not care anymore. The end had been coming for a long time. The reunion was just going down in flames.
Diane - don’t be embarassed - his ass needed whupping, he deserved everything he got & you did exactly the right thing, honey.
Stoidela said:
Hmmmm. Sounds like it would do a lot of good… as a hammer. 
My secretary just told me about a fight another co-worker had with her husband. Apparently, they were fighting or talking about something else, and the moron said that he had a crush on his summer intern! Now how stupid can you be?! It’s one thing to think it, but my God, man, don’t tell your wife!
I only mentioned a fight I had with my current husband. Me and my ex-husband had some severely nasty fights over just about everything, but those usually ended with me getting bopped upside the head with his fist. My current hubby is a pussycat compared to the ex, which is a good thing because I don’t have to live in fear anymore. The funny thing is, the fights we have usually consist of him saying something sarcastic, me saying something sarcastic back, and then walking away from each other and ignoring each other for the rest of the day. Our arguments last 30 seconds, tops. I think the only truly nasty argument we have ever had was over the kids, and that was at least five years ago and I think we were both drunk that night. That argument lasted a whole ten minutes, which is some kind of record for us.
Shadowfox
We don’t fight. Seriously. However, this ain’t Oz. There is an adage in my family, if someone is polite and nice to you, then we don’t like you. I am all politeness about most of his family.
Hmmm…
Chris:
I suppose I am a bum because I am the one that has been staying home caring for Bowen while she is working. Folks, keep in mind that I used to be the one who worked and she stayed home, and pretty soon it will go back to that, she has told me she would rather be the mommy. However, she has always been a nag.
I dont know how she knows since she is at work… but then I could say the same back to her except replace video games with pointless shopping and reading comics with reading trash novels.
[quote]
Occasionally he goes out, even more occasionally he includes me. So I let him hear about it.
[quote]
So what if I don’t go out? You go if you want and she does too, as far as going together thats when we need a sitter! Its not like thats always available especially when you make last-minute plans.
True, the biggest fights concern money, and wether she will admit it or not, she does waste a ton of money. I would see that she would spend say $120 at Walmart… what did she buy?? I never see it! On many many occasions she ADMITTED that she does this. I calculated a bank statement once, I did not count bills or anything we spent together, only what we spent separately, which would be for trivial junk like restaurants, entertainment, books, etc. the list could go on. She spent 3 times more than me and our statements usually looked like this:
Deposits: 1500
Withdrawls: 3000
Now you know the reason I am going back to work and she is staying home.
BTW, for any doubters as to my wifes spending ability, check out her sig line.
Well, its funny that this seems to be mostly the women venting, but heres one that you’ll all be glad that your man hasn’t done. Guys you can thank me later.
Give up? Ok heres the background. In college I dated a girl for a year and she was the first love, broke my heart etc. Most of the relationships are the burn hot and fast type. Well shortly after this breakup, I started into another serious relationship with a girl who got to see some of my heartbreak over this first love. After we had been together for about a year and after a few conversations about her feeling like a second choice, she finally let it go. Then one fateful night, lying naked and exhausted after a spirited bout of whoopie ( :)) I did it. The biggest whoops anyone can imagine. I called her my ex’s name. naked in bed. That ignited a pretty energetic fight that the frat brothers rode me about for months. Complete with furniture throwing, and breaking stuff, most in the buff. Believe it or not she calmed down and still spent the night, and we didn’t break up for about 5 more months. I then proceeded to get back together with the first girl. evil grin
Oh, shit howdy, that’s bad!
JESUS…are those two married and on the same MB???
boy is that dumb!!
you guys read each others diarys too?
my biggest fight with my ex was always money/work.
he was out of work, wanted money for smokes or a gram…and I would have to say NO.(actually it was more like"ha ha ha ha …no.) that put me in the role of the mother, and him into the sulky child.
If I encouraged him to go look for work, I was a nag…if I said nothing, I resented him…I had to work, and we have two kids…he pulled all kind of crap, traded an old car for dope,($500 car) got a job, got paid in mostly hash, and then lost the job, and spent his last pay getting wasted with his buddies.
we have split and got back together so many times…of course, he has a good job NOW!
but we are done.
to the above unhappy couple…make a budget…give each of you some pocket money, and get a ‘joint and’ checking account, (one which you both have to sign the checks)if you cant settle your money issues, you’re screwed.
good luck.