I recently read an anecdote where a parent stated that due to their son being bipolar, he does not like to be touched. I personally identify with that statement. I don’t mind being hugged or have someone give me a massage or even just place their hand on my shoulder for comfort. But, I really don’t like it when people touch me “unnecessarily.” Unfortunately, this also includes my fiance. He often will reach out and rub my shoulder when leaving the room. It bothers the hell out of me. I have also instructed past boyfriends to not touch me like that. Especially this one guy who would constantly rub my shoulder, back, arm, whatever whenever we were near each other. He meant it as an affectionate gesture, but it would actually make me angry.
So is this just an anecdotal thing, or is there something to this? Actual medical information is welcome, as well as personal experience.
I’m not bipolar and I hate to be touched.
It especially creeps me out when total strangers, like the wife of a person I barely know is introduced on the street and wants to hug me. How needy can you get?
I’m not bipolar, but I do have an anxiety disorder and startle easily (I suspect those two are connected).
I don’t mind being touched if I’m expecting it. But touching me when I’m not expecting it is very likely to startle me, and I don’t particularly like being startled.
I’m at a bit of a disadvantage here, too- I’m nearsighted and have worn glasses for more than half my life. That means that I don’t have very good peripheral vision beyond the extent of the lenses. When you’ve worn glasses for a long time, too, your brain starts ignoring the blurry stuff you see out there. Add to that the fact that I’m usually off in my own little world somewhere (it’s much more interesting than the real world- the Dope is one of the few things the real world has to recommend it ), it’s quite easy to catch me off guard and startle me.
Somebody on the street wants to hug me (and comes at me from the front)- OK. Somebody rubbing my shoulder as he passes by- likely to startle me, since I don’t normally keep track of whether anyone’s entering or leaving the room unless there’s some reason for me to do so.
Not bipolar, so far as I know, but I really dislike being touched. Not sure where it comes from, but I’ve been that way as long as I can remember. Like the OP, it mainly has to do with being touched ‘unnecessarily’.
Nurse Carmen It helps to think of the various disorders not as seperate things with well defined boundaries, but as blobs in a complex three dimensional web.
I’m not bipolar, but I hate being touched by strangers, or even having them invade my personal space bubble (which is probably larger than some people’s due to an upbringing lacking in physical affection, among other factors). I can just feel someone standing too close behind me in a line. Makes the hairs on my body stand on end.
I can’t stand huggy people! Don’t hug me, it isn’t you I just don’t like to be hugged!
I cringe away from people I have known for years, it is a reflex, those who know me well don’t take offense, other well… get offended.
The only people that can touch me and I don’t think at all about it are my husband, my mom and dad and my best friend. All other close family and friends, I keep a good distance from. Even when I am up, touching is not cool.
I work in a nursing home though and I have discovered that the residents will come up behind me or up to me and hug and pull on me and it never bothers me, ever. Not even when I first started, and I don’t know why. I hate kids to touch me until I really get used to them, even still I would rather them not, but old people, I am perfectly content with.
I’m not bipolar and I hate to be touched, especially unexpectedly. It’s not so bad if I see you coming and can be prepared, though. I’ve learned not to flinch so much, which really seems to hurt people’s feelings. Not that I care too much about perfect stranger’s feelings, but it does bother people who are close to me (or think they are.)
Can a child receive a firm BP diagnosis? I didn’t think this was done.
BP is part of my brain salad. I’m with Antinor01 on this. Sometimes I’d really rather nobody be within 10 feet of me, let alone touch me. Other times, touch me. Please. I’d guess the reaction has something to do with environmental control. When I crash, my space is all I believe I have, and my mood will preclude my wanting to share it. Unless, of course, you understand my “up-triggers” and happen to be someone I trust (hint, there are only about 5 such people on the planet). In which case you’re good to go.
I have a friend who is bipolar- she’s a very tactile, open and friendly person. The only times she has been weird about her personal space is when she’s been in hospital, or shortly after discharge.
If you’re at the mercy of healthcare professionals 24/7 and in a particularly vulnerable emotional state, I can imagine being twitchy about being touched would be a natural reaction.
The psych term for not wanting to be touched is “tactile defensiveness.” My son is bipolar and is like that, but I have never heard that it’s characteristic of bipolar disorder.
YaWanna, you’re right, there can be various reasons for it. The OP was asking about correlation with psychiatric conditions, so I thought those links might be of interest.
), it’s quite easy to catch me off guard and startle me.