Bizarre Signals You Didn't Know You Were Giving

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

Other variants:

“If you were on top of the monkey bars and a gay kid climbed up there, would you get down?”

“If your aunt married a guy named Jack and he got stuck on the roof, would you help your Uncle Jack off?”

“If the ugliest girl in school invited you into her bedroom, would you come?”

This is my friend Steve.
I’ll go get my coat, Steve.
This is my friend Al.
I’ll go get my coat, Al.
This is my cowboy friend Tex.
I’ll go get my coat, Tex.
HAH-HAH!

Getting back on topic, there’s a rather comprehensive Language of Flowers, so you may want to think twice before sending those yellow carnations to your sweetie or sporting a hydrangea on a date…

42

Back in my middleschool days (before I began wearing a yarmulke) I once had a skinhead classmate assume that I was a fellow bigot due to my last name being German, and the fact that I wore black workboots with red laces.

43

I’ve been told that I must be a surfer, because I have an armband-style tattoo. :confused:

44

I wish that someone had recorded that. I always love to see people who try to harass others get baffled by a smart remark.

45

elfbabe’s “positive” routine was also popular in Australia in the 80s. I’m 24, so the timing’s the same.

I’m told that a battle-axe pendant signifies that its wearer is a lesbian. I’m not sure whether all the hairy geeky men I’ve seen wearing them are aware of this meaning.

46

I was informed by my mother the other day that in some circles, wearing a dog bracelet means you’re sexually active.

Since I started wearing one recently, my first thought was “Screw them”, but then I decided that might not be the best response.

47

Years ago, some friends threw a surprise party for me, and among the gifts were a pair of seahorse pins. I liked them a lot because they were different from the round and “jeweled” pins that I was inclined to wear in those days (this was early 70s.)

My mother informed me that if you wore seahorses, you were identifying yourself as a lesbian. um, ok…

I wonder if I still have them? I rarely wear jewelry any more.

48

Along with the “Are you positive?” joke we used to have this one:

“What’s red and itchy?”

“I don’t know, what’s red and itchy?”

“Fanny rash. . . Do you get it?”

“Yeah I get it.”

“AAAAAAHHHHH!!! You get fanny rash!”

:mad: I hated those jokes.

(that’s Brit fanny, not US fanny)

49

Well, let me be the first to suggest that we, as dopers, choose our own symbol to advertise ourselves. My vote would be for a red dot painted on the bottom heel of your left shoe. Sternvogel, I’ll be watching left feet next time I am in Lafayette!!

50

When I see someone wearing a battle axe pendant, I think they’re a gamer or a SCAdian (or both!), and prefer to play barbarians.

Come to think of it, that would explain the hairy geeky men wearing this pendant.

51

*The one-pant-leg rolled up was a sign that you’d had a relative that had suffered the death penalty. *

In rap videos in the late 90s, one leg rolled up could show the rapper’s coastal loyalties (west coast vs. east coast). In some areas I’ve lived, one leg rolled up on someone who is known to sell drugs could show that they had drugs available at the time.

I’m told that a battle-axe pendant signifies that its wearer is a lesbian.

Well, not every battle axe, but the labrys is certainly a lesbian symbol. Has been for decades, at least.

I once had a skinhead classmate assume that I was a fellow bigot due to my last name being German, and the fact that I wore black workboots with red laces.

The only people who think lace colors symbolize political affiliation these days are either people who have no connection at all to the punk/skinhead scene and read about the lace thing somewhere or bald racists who call themselves skinheads because they saw some racists on tv wearing boots but have no idea what the actual history of the skinhead scene is (basic skinhead facts here). Most skins, if you ask them what difference laces mean, will say, “they mean you want to keep your boots on”.

52

The Code. Know it. Use it.

Rings: Fisting

Chains: B&D

Feathers: Transvestism

Sunglasses: Amputee fetish

Monocle: Pregnancy fetish

Insisting that people call you “Scott”: Don Henley fetish

Wristwatch on left hand: Bottom-only

Medium-length hair: Infantilism

Sideburns (on a man): Panty-sniffer

Lack of sideburns (on a man): Anonymous sex in bus station men’s room

Lack of sideburns (on a woman): Submissive necrophiliac

Clothing in primary or secondary colors: Run away as fast as you can, then call the police.

53

Maybe I’m missing something here, how can you be a submissive necrophiliac?

54

Whooooosh…

55

That’s what I figgered…

56

Oh please, please! I’ve been wanting a little purple-and-yellow SDMB pin for ages! Doperhood is one secret society I’d be glad to be associated with.

Okay, that’ll do for now… There’s something uncompelling about it, but it is easy for just about anyone to do, and very subtle. It’s also got the charm of not being soething that could get you funny questions in a job interview like a hanky in your pants, or that would conflict with rules (in a factory or a military force) like a piece of jewelry – so it’s fairly universally usable.

  • gets out red crayons *

I think a slightly more overt sign might be cool, too, though, for situations when displaying it isn’t inappropriate. For the SDMB, I recommend something unisex - to accomodate both males and females as well as all manner of transgendered folk and other, traditioanlly unaccounted-for situations. Further, something which – if it’s specific – can be individually-tailored to some degree, to allow for the braod range of peersonal styles evident among dopers. I don’t want to artificially institute uniformity on a community where little or none exists already.

The pin idea fits this fairly well - it’s small, inobtrusive, and you can wear it anywhere you like. I can put it on my necktie, on my rainbow scarf, on the breast of my blouse, on my bowler hat, or wherever. But it would be hard to implement, because we’d need to manufacture them – and it’s also a clear connection to the SDMB (and thus the Chicago Reader) which may have some legal implications. So, while something explicitly ‘SDMB’ is cool and gives a certain ‘official’ flavour to the symbol, it may be impractical or inappropriate. So what, then? What symbol with similar properties can we invent, or draw from board history?

The model here has two levels:

  1. (Shoe-dot-level) : Extremely simple, subtle, inobvious and inoffensive. Avaiable to virtually all people in virtually all situations.
  2. (Pin-level) : Cool, simple, easy, unrestricting. Available to virtually all people in any situation where a practical, regulatory, or moral consideration doesn’t proscribe it.

I’m gonna look at getting red paint for my shoe, and trying to come up with a cool symbol for level 2 – even if it only ends up being something to wear/do to be recognized in the train station on the way to Dopefests.

Like the gay subculture, we may end up developing a variety of symbols (ie, rainbows, earrings, hankies, etc.) that get applied non-universally. Nothing wrong with that, I figure. Nothing wrong with deciding we don’t want any, after all, either.

57

Word had it that in Maine, if you had any sort of owl decoration on the outside of your home, you were into incest. I have no idea.

58

those poor lefties.

59

I simply have to ask. Given the nature of the acts involved with incest, why on earth would anyone feel the need to advertise such a thing?

I can understand why one would want to advertise their gayness, masochistic tendencies, or even if they are a plushy (or is it fuzzy I always get those confused). It seems pretty obvious that they might simply want to find like minded individuals.

But given that practitioner of incest necessarily only is interested in his own family, why would he want a signal?

I’m not sure which aspect of this is more disturbing. That such people would actually want to advertise their proclivities or that enough people knew about or believed in the advertisement method. My mind is boggling.

60

Yum!