Guess how I got this wound.
I’ll give you a clue: I never saw the assailant.
Er, that was supposed to say, I never saw the assailant but I did see the weapon.
Ninja throwing star.
You’re lucky to have survived the attack. Who’d you piss off?
If I were you, I’d start sleeping with one eye open and a samurai sword under your pillow.
A steakknife-throwing poltergeist. Have you been messing with that Ouija board again?
Poltergeist?
Black cat in the night, with sharp glinting claws?
Invisible Pink Unicorn gore wound?
The very forces of nature itself turned on me today. 
wild lipsticking?
Wind blown tree branch?
It actually hurts quite a bit, but it was so weird I can’t help but be amused.
Necklace flung at Mardi Gras.
Close, but weirder.
Tree blown wind branch?
A wayward meteorite?
You snapping a treebranch at yourself?
Speaking as someone who has dashed through the woods many times and gotten similar injuries. :smack:
Actually, it was an evil “Career Fair” sign, one of those corrugated plastic affairs. I remember noticing it flailing about with one anchor pulled out, then WHAM!! I was staggering about clutching my face. I was worried broke my jaw or crushed one of those important blood vessels, it hit so hard. I didn’t even realise I was bleeding until somebody pointed it out to me. There’s gonna be a wicked bruise there for a while.
Stupid Career Fair.
VILLAGER #1:
Bread!
VILLAGER #2:
Apples!
VILLAGER #3:
Uh, very small rocks!
VILLAGER #1:
Cider!
VILLAGER #2:
Uh, gra-- gravy!
VILLAGER #1:
Cherries!
VILLAGER #2:
Mud!
VILLAGER #3:
Uh, churches! Churches!
VILLAGER #2:
Lead! Lead!
ARTHUR:
A duck!
Darn. That was my next guess.
Scarred for life by Career Fair…You’re surely not the first, but you may be the first to show it physically.
***** TMI TMI TMI TMI TMI *****
In 1986 I was attending a University of Michigan football game when a guy behind me wearing wire-rimmed glasses was hit on the bridge of the nose by a flying roll of toilet paper. The impact of the roll drove the bridge of the glasses (fashioned of two flat wires about 1/2" apart) clean into the bridge of his nose, neatly incising a chunk of flesh about 1/4" deep.
The injured party did not appear to be feeling great pain and in fact managed to laugh a bit hat his disfigurement. He had to take his glasses off to nurse the wound, which meant he could no longer follow the game, but at least he had something to stanch the bleeding, which was considerable.
My weirdest injury:
When I was about 17 I got whooping cough (despite being immunized as a kid). I had violent coughing fits every day for 3 months, so hard I’d see stars. One night, I went to see a movie with a few friends. We were standing in line at an ATM afterwards and I began one of my coughing fits when
THUMP
I had this sudden sharp pain in my side, like I’d been kicked. The pain intensified the more I moved. I figured I’d just pulled a muscle, but by the time I got home I was walking like a crab and my mom insisted on taking me to the clinic. X-rays there revealed that I’d broken a rib. From coughing. :eek: