Satan: I’m submitting your message as a nomination for a classic. Just thought you’d like to know.
For the rest of you who don’t feel like slogging through 11 pages of messages, you need to read the following. It is a masterpiece.
Written by Gaudere
posted 11-16-1999 01:28 PM
O, what can we say about Phaedy?
His sources are just a bit shady;
Our eager interest
Soon headed due west
And the light in our eyes got all fade-y
He whined and he cried just to stall
He thinks he’s the greatest of all
The arrogant ass
Made posts snide and crass
And slowed our thread down to a crawl.
“I’ve studied philosophers dead
In science and business I’ve led
also construction, guitar,
Are other hats that I wore
Just to cover my hugely swelled head.”
Then out came our andros and phil;
Zinged him quite hard, they sure will
Toss off a good flame…
Phaed’s reponse was quite lame
He whined loud til we’d all had our fill.
Reviving the thread, jab and glee
Argued their points manfully
And beeruser warn’t drunk
and who woulda thunk
he could use logic as well as could we?
Our God of the board, David B
Was hated particularly
And DrFidelis
Who never said “f*ck this!”
Should be sainted immediately
Tom argued with grace and with style;
The good Doc settled in for a while;
It was over three weeks
Before Phaedy speaks
More than wild philosophical bile.
Phaedy’s PO’d at Dawkins and Gould:
“So Godless our children are schooled!
You dirty old sod
Just leave it to God
I’m the smart one, you’re all overruled!”
“Don’t care what your new science books say
In books of new age I’ve the True way!
All your clear proper terms
Just will help reconfirm
That my mind, always closed it will stay!”
“If I get my def’nition from Redbook
I’ll honor it over your science book
Whatever you say
I’ve the only right way
My certainty cannot be shook!”
Now at post four hundred and fifty
Though with words Phaedy’s never been thrifty
He now says that he’s won
And the argument’s done
Which seems to us terribly shifty.
What arguments could he have won?
I don’t think I’d come up with one!
But he declares himself winner
Though he can’t outthink my dinner…
He’s one arrogant son-of-a-gun!
http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/000488-10.html