I had a friend like this. To be honest, she just hadn’t many good experiences with blow jobs. She’d never had good oral herself, so she really didn’t know why it was a big deal. Moreover, her former partners weren’t patient with her when she tried.
She got over it when she started dating a guy who was patient with her and let her adjust to it slowly and get used to it. And when she got good oral herself, she was much more willing to give her partner that kind of pleasure.
Female, 40. It took me much longer to be comfortable with giving blow jobs than with just about anything else, thanks to an asshole I dated in high school who repeatedly tried to force me into it. It still somehow feels more intimate than just about anything else, and it’s always taken me longer in a relationship to do it than to have intercourse.
But the payoff is soooo worth it. 
I’m glad I got over that hangup, although it took years.
32 year old female.
I can’t recall the last time I had sex without giving a blow job at some point before penetration (after is rather icky, even with some washing). I enjoy it immensely.
My husband very rarely went down on me, but given that there are many more fluids involved and I find it overstimulating anyway, I didn’t hold it against him.
Not doing it, or being bad at it, is a dealbreaker for me.
Is it better to give than to receive? Yes it is - so I go down too, and usually I’m the first one down there.
33 year-old female. A friend of mine didn’t used to give her husband (then fiance) blow jobs. She said she wasn’t very good at it and hurt him once. She asked me for tips and she’s apparently been quite successful since. She also really enjoyed it when he gave her head, but I don’t think it was a requirement.
Anyway, she’s the only woman I’ve ever known of who wouldn’t give head and now she does, so I guess I don’t know anyone who won’t now.
42 y/o male here.
My last GF didn’t give head, but she had (or claimed) a medical reason. Said her jaw had locked on more than one occassion (not always involving penis) and she was extremely reluctant to risk it happening again. Seemed reasonable. Disappointing, but reasonable. Thankfully, she liked to fuck almost as much as I do, so other than that, our sex life was excellent.
I went down on her occassionally, but since I knew there would be no reciprocity I was less enthusiastic about it than I usually would be. And altho that wasn’t the only reason I broke up with her, it was something that factored into the decision. I mean, I like blow jobs just slightly less than sex. And I’m willing to give my next GF a chance to convince me that I have them backwards… I’ve been wrong before.
Male, 40
I’ve never dated a girl who wouldn’t. I dated a girl once who did it once then got all nervous about “how far we’d gone” and wouldn’t consider it again.
Dealbreaker? Yes. I consider sex pleasurable and I consider oral sex part of a healthy sex life. If I were available and met a girl and learned that oral sex wasn’t part of her repertoire, I’d happily introduce her to it. If she resisted, I’d thank her for her time and wish her well. Not one to yoke myself to an unbeliever am I.
I’ve received rave reviews on my oral technique over the years, including the fact that I believe it contributed to one girl breaking up with me because I did it too well. Strange story.
FWIW, I’m one of the people who have been referred to above as not being able to get off on oral. It’s not that it’s too much stimulation, at least in my case. I still enjoy the attention and stimulation.
Male 36
I had a girlfriend in college who wouldn’t do it. She had all sorts of sexual hang-ups though including getting very upset if I put my mouth on her breasts. I think I only gave her oral a couple times because she didn’t seem to get much out of it.
Lived with a girl who acted as though it was a giant chore and she was doing me some sort of favor when she did it. It wasn’t much of a favor, if you know what I mean.
I never actually got off from a blowjob until I met my wife. So go me. And her
Let’s get clinical about this. There’s the stimulation of the tip versus the pressure around the shaft - it’s nice to feel surrounded by what you’re penetrating. That, and having … teeth … down there … meh. And unless the BJ is the finale, there’s the matter of follow-up, which might include kissing, which might involve ingesting one’s own, ermmm, discharge. Not big on that part, nope.
On the other hand, orally stimulating a woman … fun as hell.
Blow jobs? Not so much.
I could really go for some eggs benedict right now.
My hubby had never, ever had one when I met him. He was 40 yrs old, I think.
In my old age I have developed TMJ issues, so alas that is something which has fallen by the wayside. The guy always enjoyed it more than I did anyway.
Out of the dozen or so women I’ve been with, all but three went down on me at some point (but two out of the three who didn’t were just one night stands, so it wasn’t expected, really.) But that’s not saying a lot, because three or four of them that did only did it two or three times each, and pretty half-assed at that.
Going beyond that, most of the few that are left that did it with any regularity still didn’t do it that well…only one did it well and seemed to enjoy it (and was also the only one who swallowed…in fact, she was the only one who even let me “finish” in her mouth, the others would stop moments before and finish me off with their hand, or they wouldn’t even let me get close enough to finish because they wanted me to give them regular sex.)
The sad part is that it’s the most recent partner I had (which was even more sadly a year before last October…so late 2007.) So I went almost 25 years and over ten partners without ever getting a “proper” BJ, as it were.
And it should be known that I pre-reciprocate. I LOVE going down on a woman, and will do it with wild abandon. One of my girlfriends actually didn’t like getting (or giving) oral, so it took a while before she agreed to let me do it, though she did enjoy it when I did. And another girl I dated (my first serious GF,) said she wasn’t a fan of getting it, (though she still let me,) but when I started to do it she realized she was a fan, the other guys she dated just sucked at it. 
And with a name like that, it’s all you’ll ever get.
30/m/ca
I grew up around L.A. and most the girls I dated after high school fellated. After dating a while the frequency dropped. I didn’t stick around with the girls who didn’t.
re: guys not going down on girls, I’ve actually come across an increasing number of women who don’t want cunnilingus. Initially I found it odd but the subject of being self-conscious came up on more than one occasion.
Male 50. Appreciate the effort as part of foreplay but I’m indifferent beyond that. Never dated a women who didn’t do it.
I happen to know my ex lied to his next partner and said he’d never had one. I think (rightly or wrongly) that a lot of men tell that lie to manipulate new partners who don’t seem eager to do it.
Not that I’m accusing your ex of being one of those men who lie.
Honestly: this close to being my new sig. Fucking wonderful.
(FWIW: I’ve never dated a girl who didn’t give them and never fail to return the favor.)
My husband dislikes getting oral from me, and has little interest in performing, as well. Although he’s enjoyed good oral in the past, he claims that my back teeth aren’t wide enough, and they lightly scrape. He’s not interested in less involved attempts that don’t involve back teeth/throat. So while I’m willing, he’s not. He also has teeth paranoia, and is worried that he’ll get bitten. As for the reverse, he is concerned he’ll do it “wrong” and has performance anxiety, and I don’t have enough desire for the act to pressure him into practicing/learning.
Besides that, in general bad hygiene is a BIG issue, for males and females. If it smells like a bowel movement or urine, or just nasty, I wouldn’t consider going there (and likely wouldn’t continue non-oral anything, either). Also, if the hair on your head is greasy, then I’m not going to attempt to find out if you have better hygiene elsewhere.
Yeah, I told him that if he was lying it was a spectacular lie, a great one to tell the ladies and it also worked very well. Not that I wasn’t eager to do it but it did make me more eager to hear it.
But it definitely was the truth. All his friends found out the very next day and gave him mad props for finally getting it done. I should be ashamed at this but…I liked it
Hunny, I’ve seen the pictures you send of yourself in this board. You’re blazing hot.
I am 23/m and I not only knew a girl who had never given head, nor wanted to…I dated her.
When we started dating she had done next to nothing with a guy (only made out). Everything we did was her first time doing it (not sex, she was/is a marriage girl). I tried to get her to give me head, and she would go down for a while, but always ended up stopping because she couldn’t fathom the thought of the ending. I would assume this trend is continued, but after she shattered my heart and moved away…I haven’t (can’t) spoken to her.