This is so much fun. 
All I can say is . . .
Oh, please, Goddess, don’t ever EVER let me piss off these people.
And Byz . . . can I be your apprentice tart? Please? I’ll work hard and give you footrubs and make you chocolate chip cookies.
“I’m surprised that you’ve never been told before, that you’re lovely, that you’re perfect, and that somebody wants you.” - Semisonic, f.n.p
You know, I haven’t been posting here for very long, and I had no idea why everyone seemed to be filled with such vitriol for Brithael. He seemed a bit obnoxious, but harmless. However, the more I learned, the more I came to agree with you guys, so here is a limerick I wrote especially for the occasion:
THere once was a poster named BRithy
WHose posts were never called pithy
HE insults all our mothers
BUt to all the others
HE just looks like a terminal thiththy.
Thank you, I’ll just wander off now.
Neuro, you’re good.
If you’re an optimist, you haven’t been paying attention.
Ok…I shall step back into the ring…
at the top of my list. Ai/hue/blargeddy blarg. I dont care how many Friends a person has. Thats something that should scare only social creatures much like yourself. I bet you shop at the Gap! NO TECH VESTS ALLOWED
<ok so I am the only one who thinks its funny>!
Wally Can you say that again?..in a language i Understand? I dont speak arsehole!
–TAG–
Neuro <just for the sheer Hell of it>
Neuro was a girlie
So cold and crass
Lightning flew from her eyes
and Hot gas from her ass
Lets trash Brit in a poem
Oh my how witty
Your rhyme scheme might be ok
but your Content is shitty
If thats all you got
rolling round in your head
You should think about
Flinging doo doo instead!
< :)>
Oh, Brithy, Brithy, Brithy, dear. You do amuse me to no end! The poem was a really sweet gesture, nobody has ever written a poem just for me before. So, you don’t speak arsehole, eh? Well, your lessons seem to be coming along nicely, because you sure type arsehole. Or should I say, “out of your arsehole.” Your head and upper body are firmly lodged in your intestinal tract, but you do occasionally reach an arm out to dash off a witty rejoinder now and again. Of course, you can’t see the keyboard, so you make a lot of typos. Incidentally, I couldn’t help but notice that your latest post was relatively free of those little editorial bugbears that you are plagued with, perhaps your head is now so far up your ass that you look normal again. This should mean that you’re due to begin making a second trip around soon. Perhaps you should change your name to Klein bottle. Brithael. It’s a nice name, I rather like it. And I do mean that in all sincerity. Yet another reason why you should change it, it doesn’t fit you at all. You know, I’ve been thinking of taking up gardening lately. I think I’ll plant some daisies. In your ears. I’ll give them plenty of sunshine, lots of water, and they will grow very well, nourished by the bullshit in your head. You want flames, Brithy? I have not yet begun to flame! I will toast your genitalia with this lightning coming out of my eyes, and that stench you smell doesn’t come from my ass, it comes from behind your nose. Let me know when you find it.
Hey, Byzantine! How come you never told me how much fun this is?
Yes, fun as it is, I’ve called it off. Unless Brithael wants me to keep at him. Verbally, I mean! Or typally? Whatever! I have a NEW fish to fry! But if Brithael wants to throw down the gauntlet to others… have at it! I love to watch, er, well, YOU know what I mean!
Who is your new fish, Byzantine?
Actually Neuro i put “just for the hell of it” in between my favorite little symbols < less than and > Greater than but it seems this little quirk of mine didnt like the HTML capabilities of the pageor vice versa. (however you are right I can fertilize entire Grain fields with the shit in my head) As Ripley once said, “Believe it …or not!”
Anyways, that was my intent. If it has gotten enough of a rise out of you to spur you into some Profanity-laden limerick Frenzy by all means…< :)>
And for Wally and any other bohab I am eager to oblige…bring on all 40 points of your IQ!
You maggot infested pile of steaming rat shit!
You say one more word about Wally, and I swear, I will reach through my computer, grab you by your pencil neck, and snap it with two fingers!
You are a moron, and no matter how many times you post, no matter how many different names you use, we will find you.
You are a puss filled boil on the ass of a monkey.
You SUCK!
Brithael, stop beating me over the head.
Can’t you see you’ve won?
I’m no match for you.
Ripley said that?
Well, I’ll be damned!
If you’re an optimist, you haven’t been paying attention.
Wow!
Thanks, Kelli.
Love ya!
Kryptonite? Oh, come on, Byz, you can do better than that! Brithael could at least come up with interesting and entertaining retorts that fueled this flame war for how many posts? 70? 80? Kryptonite, in my opinion, is better off ignored. Although I do agree, it’s time to take Brithael off the burner and give someone else a chance. I’ve flamed him all I need to, and I feel much better now. So who’s next?
I wasnt aware that I have been using any other names. thats how it works Kelli. You mention me …I must mention you. Perpetuate the cycle. I only insult people I like, maybe its a Freudian thing. (actually I didnt like Wally immediately…it takes a few responses)
I could make a sick joke comparing the attention of an insult to party flirting but I wont! 
“~ATTITIDE…ya got some fucking ATTITUDE…Inside your feeble brain theres bound to be a whore. If you dont shut your mouth you’re gonna feel the FLOOR…Attitude the one you go oh baby attitude~”
–“Attitude” Misfits
When I compare this last post to the first few, I must ask WHY???
Why did you ‘talk’ so stupid?
Why did you present yourself as a troll?
Why stop now?
Why are you now coherent and articulate?
Why?
Okay, I’ve been gone for a few days and I’m trying to catch up. Let me do an “all over the thread” response. Don’t feel bad if I left you out. Yeah, like you would! Sorry, a bit of the C#3 “everything revolves around me” crap got into my head. Anyway;
AzureByte: Hey Byz, who loves ya?! UH! :Þ
Hey, love you too, you whacko! You call your patients whackos? Yeah, they uh, like it!
Ai\ Yue- Ha
: If I knew HTML that would be more impressive.
You being intelligent, able to type and spell… THAT’S impressive! Let me be like the 15th person to welcome you aboard this leaking ship we are now sailing. Seems to me that the incoming great poster is about 1 for every 3 trolls. Those are bad odds folks and we need to get more intelligent posters out here.
WallyM7: I’d rather be hated than ignored.
phouka: can I be your apprentice tart?.. and make you chocolate chip cookies.
Yes. As long as your flirts are within the scope of the topic I don’t see a problem. If you feel the need to post random, meaningless sexual come-ons, please don’t associate yourself with me. And I LOVE chocolate chip cookies! Yum! Send me some cyber ones! Or here, let me just give you my address…
The Peyote Coyote: Who is your new fish, Byzantine?
Christ in a side car but there are just too many to name them! Why don’t we open this up to a free for all bash on anyone YOU care to tangle with! I don’t want to lead the charge this time. You pick the name and we will bash!
neuro-trash grrrl: So who’s next?
You tell me.
kellibelli: Why are you now coherent and articulate?
Because a good solid bash thread like this works some times. The poster sees the errors of their ways, cleans up their posts and gets welcomed as a member rather than branded a troll. I really do believe people can change. Sometimes you have to hit them repeatedly in the head with a big rock but eventually…
Oh, and WallyM7: that was just too good of a joke to pass up! We already talked about this in another thread so we’re square. Just wanted to mess with you a bit. Make sure you read this whole post. Call me evil. Call me a bitch. Call me sophomoric! But only call me sophomoric if you can spell it correctly!
I always read all your posts, Byz, you evil. sophomoric bitch.
Well, you did say I could call you that if I could spell somophoric.
If you’re an optimist, you haven’t been paying attention.
If you’ll kindly excuse me for a second…
Yes, yes, that’s it kindly folk – to one side or another…
Ah, there we go…
A corredor of opportunity…
A clean line of shot…
Brithael,
You scabbed sore on the inside of your mother’s vagina;
You ugly import cab driver they wish to bend over in Carolina.
You louse, lout and larva,
No one will ever be yer partna,
Until we decide upon the best cut: your impotence or castrata.
(Ahhh. It’s good to be back. And there’s no way that could be misconscrued as flirting.)
Oh, I forgot. Brithael blows.
(Gee… it’s good to get back in the swing of things!)
Oh!? Your kung-fu is pretty good Chief Scott
Your socks they smell
Your feet they stink
You never take a bath
Your Nose it runs
Your pimply buns
you always finish last
SICK…of …YOU…
I’m so sick so sick of you-hoo-hoo
Your face is gross
You slow Milquetoast
you dont know what to do
and just your luck
You really Suck
And so I’m sick of you!
SICK…OF…YOU
I’m so sick so sick of you-oo
This is very late, but I’ve been trying to stay out of the Pit.
Brithael: No, I’ve never been to the Gap. I’m not much of a social person, either. My point was that WAY back there you were complaining because everyone was unloading on you. I tried to explain why.
Anyway, you seemed to have developed a sudden command of the English language and are holding your own in several flame battles. If you were to start making some reasonable posts outside of the Pit, you would probably just be one more reg.
I sure as hell wouldn’t hold this mess against you.
–John (with the FAQ, again, since Brithael seemed to miss it. Ai\ Yue- Ha
is a very common Chinese name)
The Ai\ Yue- Ha
FAQ:
- Eye You-way Han
- It’s Chinese.
- The symbols are tone marks.
- No, I wasn’t drunk when I registered.
- Just call me John, OK?