I would, but I’m working smarter not harder.
I’ll have to restock my toolbox and scale the cliff-face myself then
turns pale and flees
It’s OK Matt, I think you jumped the shark.
Oh, man. Funny stuff guys.
Our esteemed leader Cees Van Der Lede just stated in his yearly newsletter that:
”We will put focus on all our applications”.
It wouldn’t be half as funny if it was in Dilbert…
I just took a call from a company wanting to sell us IT products and services:
“[company] routes product via a staff of customer-dedicated Account Executives utilising pro-active outbound telephone based sales”
Um, you mean you phone people and try to sell them stuff?
Email from my boss just this morning started out with:
“Live for today but plan for the future!!!”
Sound advice, dontcha think?
I started to trawl through the company newsletter for more fun things, but there were so many my brain tried to explode. I’ll have to let it cool down for a while…
But why do these people do it? Why is so much bull shit produced (and we are talking methane-rich bull shit) by so many people who know they are doing it?
And what’s more, it’s contagious. I know the emperor’s starkers but I find myself writing it for real myslef. Frightening, bloody frightening.
Hey, Humble Servent! Don’t ya be expecting me to “green-light” anything. I work in a hospital. Not only do I have to deal with corporate bilge doublespeak, but medical jargon as well. And when the two collide…shudder
I think it’s a case of over-editing and over embellishment. Some people just have too much time on their hands.
So anyway, are we all aligned on this?
Oh geez, looks like I moved too fast to coopt you–how about I do my homework and try again? I want to make things right for you.
See, what we want to do is collect best practices data–you in the patient care services delivery world have loads of history with this type of study. If you’ll help out here, I’ll arrange for the finished product to be fully within the parameters of HIPAA, and we’ll even do a run-through for JCAHO. Do you know whether we’ll need a CON? I don’t think EMTALA will be implicated, but we may identify some outliers with reimbursement issues.
I think we need a subcommittee.
puts back the crossbow, and searches for something with a faster rate of fire
I think we should express our appreciation of Gary, who’s clearly going for a quick win and being proactive in maximizing his throughput.
I think he should focus on his team skills.
I just had a thought.
I have a conference call with our marketing department in Houston this afternoon, who usually inflict this sort of rhetoric on me at every opportunity.
I think it’s revenge time. This thread should give me at least a half hours worth of ammo.
My head just popped.
That’s it, HS you just killed me. Happy?
particlewill, whos torso has taken over. (I did most of the thinking here anyway.) ((No you didn’t, I did!)) (((Shut up crotch!)))
The reason we are bombarded with this shit is that consultants get paid good money for dreaming it up - and no CEO is ever going to admit he wasted that money.
Sorry, I don’t know what came over me there. I think that was a classic example of non-value-adding play.
Hrm. None of you non-vertically-aligned SMEs will maximise the best-of-breed potentiality of your human capital if you don’t refocus on your core competencies.
Mine are drinking, eating and swearing. How much do I get paid?