But... I'm white... and I have a jacket!

The BBQ Pit
21

You made me laugh and I spilled my tea. :smiley:

To the OP:
Ah, fickle women… you think you know them, and then they surprise you. See the nice, “safe” white guy with the jacket and trimmed beard? See the light brown guy with the scraggy beard and jeans on? Which one, which one? What’s behind the curtain or what does Jay have in the box?* Decisions, decisions…

What she probably saw was this: white guy with shaved head=skinhead. Manchester jacket and shaved head and beard=anyone’s guess. “Arab” looking guy with jeans, beard and leather jacket=university student. She picks that guy.
OR she always sits in that particular seat on that tram.
OR she wanted to sit next to him, so that she could admire you from afar.

OR she just got on the damned tram and sat down. Her feet hurt and she needs to think about her next brilliant move shorting stocks.

OR she’s actually a secret cell agent for Al Queda and was sending him silent hand message and evil thoughts via transference. His receiver is hidden in his beard. :rolleyes:

OR who the hell knows? You spend time on this kind of thing? Clearly politicians in your country are NOT overworked.

*Very old Monty Hall/Let’s Make a Deal reference.

22

Did the woman you were going to have lunch with keep looking at the better looking men, too?

23

In the absence of further enlightenment, I’m going to assume would-be plane hijacker was just a joke that didn’t come out they way it was supposed to.

24

Perhaps she realized your breath smells like dick.

(not that there’s anything wrong with that)

25

I’ve heard that girls always gravitate to the “bad boy”…

26

This guy sounds like your run-of-the-mill tram hijacker, not a plane hijacker. The problem with being a tram hijacker, of course, is the frustration level: your demands to turn the tram around and take it to Cuba are met with protests that the tracks only go in a fixed direction, and the tram is, by God, going to go in that direction and not to Cuba.

This is why tram hijackers are looked down on by hijackers of steerable transportation.

27

By design, not by God.

28

Maybe it was an age thing…how old are you?

If we are going to be honest here, I’ve had the same feelings many times, on buses, on planes…especially on the shuttle bus I ride. People will squish in in tighter spaces or look at the two seats on either side on me and decide to stand. I showered! I’m neatly dressed! And then when they stand, anyone getting on later can’t see the back of the shuttle or just assumes there are no seats, so they stand too…which leads to a huge number (okay, maybe 6) people standing squished in the front of the shuttle while I sit there in the back, empty seats all around me, like a pariah.

Or the time a mother putting her young son on the plane to travel alone took one look at me, my infant on my lap covered by a blanket while she nursed (you really couldn’t tell if she was nursing or asleep) and hustled her precious snowflake into another seat by a man. The little boy read the swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated for the whole flight. But sitting next to a young mom and baby was too scary…

29

Nah–it was the possibility of him seeing your exposed breast which would have caused instant puberty, making him go berserk and attempt to sexually assault the flight attendants. They covered this problem in last month’s RedBook.

I’ll sit down next to anyone. Well, maybe not a white guy with a shaved head and a goatee. Ew!

ETA: I just googled Manchester jacket and instead of the quaint and cool vaguely deerstalker type thing I was envisioning, it’s a parka/motorcycle type thing. No wonder she sat somewhere else…

30

Clearly, the woman on the tram is a spy, and what you should have done is immediately get out your cell camera so you could record the exchange of documents.

Another missed opportunity!

I do love that politicians dress up a notch when meeting civil servants. Nice touch!

31

I find that when I’m on public transportation,and a good looking woman gets on board…

If I look at her cataloging her every feature, and memorizing her beautiful face, while imagining the two of us making sweet, sweet love in the middle of the Djurgården and sharing her with the civil servant concubine at my side…

She goes and sits somewhere else.

32

Oh hell. I hate making the split-second decision of where to sit on public transportation, and this just confirms that my choices are being observed. Sometimes a seat is just a seat. If this other guy had his feet less extended than yours, or took up less space in his seat, that could have been it.

33

I’m not going to tell you his name, but I can assure you he isn’t that. Very far from it.

34

If you just googled “Manchester jacket” the image results are nearly all going to be for Manchester United jackets, which will be nylon and sporty and hooded and not at all respectable.

He means something like this.

35

Interesting Rorshach OP.

He told a story, giving nothing but neutral facts. Unless Stoneburg has some history I’m unaware of, it seems equally possible that he is sad or happy that she sat next to the Arab.

36

I read this whole thing waiting for the link to the thread it’s parodying, but apparently, this cheese stands alone. Huh.

37

“But I’m white… and I have a jacket!” is not a neutral statement. In the context, it suggests that he wanted her to sit next to him, or at least expected her to do so, and that being white makes one a more inviting seatmate.

He also used the term “shunning” in the last paragraph, which again suggests he feels… discriminated against? Don’t think that’s the right word.

38

Keep playing up the plane-hijacker angle and you could have an episode of Yes, Sinister.

39

Is it really that hard to get the OP? Is this thread one giant whoosh?

40

OR she’s one of the highly trained, super secret Tram Marshals we’ve been hearing so much about. She was put on that tram specifically to keep an eye on probable arab hijacker dude. Probably had a 45 aimed at his skull in case he stood up or took something out of pocket.