The use of “Carol of the Bells” in every fuckin’ advert. Yes, it’s probably one of those royalty-free songs and therefore it’s cheap to use. Yes, some cleverdick can make up lyrics for your crap product and insert them. But there are about four or five different commercials using the damn song! I actually heard a new one today - for Hooters.
The Hyundai “Holi-DUH!” sale spot. I think it has mercifully ended its run. The singers look like freaks, and one in particular looks like “The Leader” in that Simpsons episode where they join a cult.
Best Buy brat who bitches on the phone with her BFF about not being able to get a navel piercing, but then changes her tune when tool mom and dad show up with Best Buy boxes. Do you want to associate your products with such an obnoxious person?
Beyonce’s DirecTV “Lemme Upgrade Ya” ad. It probably has nothing whatsoever to do with the holidays, but it’s been airing quite a bit. I have no idea why she is dancing and promising to upgrade my satellite. She looks awkward as hell in the ad trying to dance and hock the wares. Worse, I get the sense that she will shill anything for cash - a phone, satellite TV, you name it.
Ugh, so bad. I don’t know what’s worse, the dancing, or the horrible “upgrade” necklace she has in her mouth for one shot.
My contribution:
A Best Buy ad where the family is upset that they have to wait until after they see grandma before they can open their Best Buy gifts. They get in the car, go to grandma’s, honk the horn and wave, and then leave cause they saw her and can now open the presents from Best Buy.
Actually, it’s not the concept of the commercial I hate, it’s the mother/wife. She looks…weird. I don’t know what it is about her face, but it give me the willies.
Every single diamond commercial I have seen in the past month, from “He went to Jared!” to the one about showing how your love has grown with progressively larger diamonds.
Yes, show how much you love her with conspicuous consumption!
The “He went to JARED” ones aren’t holiday specific, are they? They’re blisteringly stupid, no doubt about that. More annoying are the “Every kiss begins with Kay” Kay Jewelers ads, due to the irritating jingle and extensive use of nauseatingly sweet children.
I’m no fan of Target’s holiday ads either–I’m thinking of one that seems to be based around an advent calendar, with people opening the little doors from inside, peeking out, and so on. Lousy music again.
Any “Buy your woman something shiney and expensive” commercial.
But I do hate those throughout the year. My Wife and daughters are not magpies.
(Luckily I established my refusal to purchase diamonds as a political stance several years ago, so now I can claim to be principled instead of just being mean.)
I content myself with thinking that, if she puts it on backwards or upside-down the progressively smaller diamonds shows how his love for her is decreasing.
Damn, you won the thread in the OP. That ad makes me want to hit myself with a brick until I pass out.
There’s a WalMart holiday that that bothers me, but I can’t recall the exact quote that’s annoying, so in the meantime I will nominate any car commercial (I’m looking at YOU, Lexus) that has someone buying a car as a christmas gift for their significant other. Yeah, there are LOTS of people doing that. Please.
The Verizon ad with the girl whose friends all got new phones while she got a pony. Funny exactly once. Not funny when shown during every single commercial break.
As I said in the other thread, the one where the little girl gets asked “Do you believe in Santa?” and she replies, “I believe in cashmere!”. I’ve been trying to think of what the commercial is for and I BELIEVE that it’s Burlington Coat Factory. I hate that line so much…
I haven’t seen it on TV, but there’s radio commercials and billboards for Helzberg (sp?) diamonds.
“There’s that guy. You know the one. He knows his wife’s birthday. He knows her favorite flower is the rhinoculus. He knows how to SPELL rhinoculus.”
It goes on about this apparently mythical fellow who has, from the description, met his wife and has some reasonable knowledge of her interests. I believe it also mentioned he is nice to his own mother.
“That guy can think of a present. But you can’t! So go to Helzberg diamonds and you can make her just as happy as he can!”
It’s not just misandrist, assuming a ‘regular guy’ can’t figure out his SO’s interests to save his life. It’s not just misogynist, assuming that women are so materialistic that a sparkly pebble can replace affection and involvement. I think it’s just depressing.
I HATE HATE HATE these ads more than any other on TV. A huge Jared store just opened near me, and my husband is under strict orders to never buy me anything from there.
I thought there was a seasonal Jared ad, but it might just be that they’ve started showing them a bajillion times a day on every single channel. I think in this case, quantity takes the place of quality – they’re showing them so often because it is the holiday season, not necessarily because they’re holiday themed.
Man, if some guy I was dating showed up at Christmas with some stupid “show how your love has grown” necklace because he couldn’t think of anything better, I’d be pissed. I’d rather have a gift certificate to Amazon than that stupid necklace.
Ha! I posted this in the thread for the ones we liked and someone hipped me to the actual song being used “My Patch” by Jim Noir. Not even slightly a Christmas song. Funny video though.
I hate the one with the guy who doesn’t have to buy diamonds because he’s decent at painting his wife’s toes. Speaking as an experianced toe painter, that shit ain’t working for getting you out of gift buying. His wife is hot though.
If you guys think the Jared ads on TV are bad, they’ve started polluting the ESPN Football Today podcast as well. Unless Jared starts making football-related jewelry, I don’t want to hear about it (and even then I probably don’t want to.)
And I said in the other thread (I didn’t want to thread-defecate so I only mentioned my dislike) I hate ads that use Carol of the Bells in general and Garmin ads in particular (though that Ultraman parody they were running for a while was funny.) And one of Hooters? Haven’t seen it, but if the lyrics don’t run along the lines of:
Look we’ve got boobs
Big silicone boobs
And also wings
Boobs boobs boobs boobs boobs
and so on and so forth they need to fire their ad agency. Because that’s all I think of when I think of Hooters: overpriced mediocre chicken wings and frat boys who want to see breasts.
The one where the guy’s total bitch-cunt of a wife hangs up on him when he explains that he has to work late so he can’t pick up their kid from his sport practice. Then he’s standing outside with the gift vehicle with a bow on it, and just shrugs and says, “Just a lil’ sun’in.”
The guy’s wife is a horrible demon bitch-monster. She prostitutes her sexuality to him in exchange for his capital through their marriage, staying home without working, THEN has the audacity to get angry at him for having to do the work to support her lifestyle.
I don’t understand why this affluent, suburban yuppie Dad suddenly turns into Jay-Z when he lapses into a Brooklyn hip hop slang, “Just a lil’ suh-in suh-in!”
You saw a far different ad than I did. I saw a woman who was slightly put out because she couldn’t count on her husband to do the task he’d promised to, but who quickly pulled herself together to go what needed to be done without making a big deal about it, and a husband (with son there, so he *had *done what he’d promised) getting her outside to see her surprise.
I don’t watch ads but once in a blue moon (although I did see the one just mentioned), but I still hold lots of hatred for the Old Navy ads of years past. Are they still doing those awful things?