There was this guy I went to high school with named Andrew. We weren’t very close, more of a friend of a friend type thing, but he called me last night. I was a little shocked, but pleasantly. He was a nice guy, his friends I knew were all pretty cool, and he was pretty interesting to talk to (although it was one of those kinda awkward, saying what’s happened to us in the past year conversations). Anyway, after being on the phone with him for about twenty minutes, he says kinda suddenly “Hey, do you need a belt?” “Excuse me?” “A belt? Do you need a belt, because I’d buy you one, if you needed a belt.” I said no, because I already own this one really cool glitterly belt, then Andrew made some stupid excuse to get off the phone. My question–what the fuck? Does anyone have any idea what this means?
He is obviously at a low in his career life. I bet he is selling belts now for a living. Like those freaks selling Fake Designer Perfumes all over the place. Man are they annoying. They approach people in parking lots and everywhere.
Or maybe he got a good deal on 100 belts and he is trying to turn a profit.
… wait, he said he would BUY you a belt? Not SELL you a belt? WTF, I have no idea. I checked the pick-up like thread and I could not find anyting about buying someone a belt. That is curious…
“pick-up like thread” should be “pick-up line thread”
I do not usually correct my many errors, but that seemed kinda confusing 
That has got to be one of the weirdest things I have heard recently. I really don’t know what to make of that. Maybe he likes you but just is bad with words. But a belt? That seems a really strange. Especially his wording. Well, maybe he figures he can afford a belt, as opposed to a car.
belt n.[ol][li]A flexible band, as of leather or cloth, worn around the waist to support clothing, secure tools or weapons, or serve as decoration.[/li][li]Something that resembles this type of band: a belt of trees.[/li][li]An encircling route.[/li][li]A seat belt.[/li][li]A continuous band or chain for transferring motion or power or conveying materials from one wheel or shaft to another.[/li][li]A band of tough reinforcing material beneath the tread of a tire.[/li][li]A geographic region that is distinctive in a specific respect: “This is America’s rural poverty belt” (Charles Kuralt). See Synonyms at area.[/li][li]Slang. A powerful blow; a wallop.[/li][li]Slang. A strong emotional reaction.[/li][li]Slang. A drink of hard liquor.[/ol][/li]
I think he was referring to definition #10. Do you feel silly or what?
~~Baloo
I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry for him after reading this.
Laugh - he’s obviously disturbed, hopefully in a harmless way. He’ll start leaving little gifts on your doorstep, like sharp cheddar cheese, a rake, a rear window wiper for a 1984 Dodge Omni, or a bottle of Woolite. If you’re lucky, you can scare him off and not hurt his feelings.
Cry - he was incredibly shy and uneasy about calling and talking to you, and somewhere in the conversation he felt like he was loosing his grip, and the brain went “CTRL-ALT-DEL”. In this case, he’s proabably OK unless he keeps offering you strange things - if so, then you should refer to the first answer above.
Why i never… that is weeeeird!!!
Call him back just for curiousity… hey maybe he did mean #10 who knows? Ofcourse he might be just another freak with a belt fettish… but atleast call him back and find out!?!
Keep us updated!
I don’t know him that well, but I’m pretty sure he wasn’t referring to a drink of hard liquor–what I remember about him is he was kinda anti-alchohol.
Was it a “I don’t know what to say so I’m going to say something completely off the wall” kind of things?
Perhaps there was too much dead air on the phone and the thing that entered his mind was a line from a play, movie, book, etc that meant something to him but is out in la-la-land to the rest of us.
Maybe he wanted to try to find out if you gained/lost weight in a “subtle” way.