I was raiding the fridge and asked my (distressingly-adult) kids what they were watching.
“He-Man, of course.”
“You know what your mother told Willy and Bobby, right?”
“It was her idea.”
When they were young Wife babysat a couple kids. Last I heard (several years ago), one was in Artillery. Either way, they both passed the Heterosexuality Test early on by being fans of Ms Thunderthighs, She-Ra. But Wife got sick enough of their incessant desire to watch, play, and discuss “He-Man” to ask, “Do you know is the REAL Master of the Universe?”
“Jesus!” was the trolled-for reply, and He-Man viewing was reduced. However, I assume some of you watched it and might like to discuss it, so I will not be judgmental.
I have a deep loathing for all things He-Man, and Thundercat, and G.I. Joe, and any other extended animated commercial for toys of that era. I was way too old for the shows when they came out…teen-aged and beyond. Unfortunately, my baby brother was 16 years younger than me, and right in the target audience. Every Christmas, for several consecutive years, “Santa” brought him related toys. Castles. Forts. Vehicles. Assorted crap. All of which came with the haunting phrase “assembly required”…or worse still…“adult assembly required”.
Want to guess who was the designated assembler of said toys? Yeah. Damn things came in approximately 50,000 pieces each…some of which were guaranteed to be missing, broken, or malformed. Instructions apparently drafted by drunken monkeys learning English as a third language. Diagrams poorly labled, mislabled, or not labled at all. Baby bro goes to bed around 10 pm. Clock is ticking. Santa must deliver fully assembled shit, or the world as we know it may never be the same. Big Bro gotta come through. Clock ticking. House sleeping. Except for Big Bro who is cursing. Goddamn toys. Hate em. Hate. HATE.
Fuck him. He wanted them? He can put them together Which was the philosophy of my parents and older brothers. Which didn’t include the instructions. “There’s a picture on the box. Figure it out.”
I liked She-Ra better than He-Man even before I became aware of my sexuality, just because she was so much cooler. He-Man was just strong and good with a sword. She-Ra was all that, plus her sword could turn into other things, and she could heal, and she had a flying mount. No contest, really.
And of course, once I got a bit older, the thighs didn’t hurt things, either.
All the He-Man cartoons I watched growing up are just a vague blur of memory by now, but wasn’t Snarf from Thundercats?
My big brother and I were both of an age to appreciate He-Man when the cartoons aired. We once got the toy Castle Greyskull for Christmas. It was awesome. I don’t know who assembled it.
Oh and yes dad “that boy ain’t right” for watching She-Ra, clearly! Could someone explain this thinking to me, watching an animated chick in a leather bikini indicates what about a young boy exactly?
Um, that may be more about your dad. I see it as an examination, that you passed. Unless you are a girl, but then you are still welcome in the discussion.
I had a young nephew who loved He-Man. He also attended Catholic School. I think he was five or maybe six when he quite seriously asked me “Can He-Man beat up Jesus?” I told him “He-Man could beat up Jesus but he wouldn’t and if he did he would regret it later.”
