<Bart and Jim are wearing KKK outfits to infiltrate the enemy’s lynch mob>
Jim: [spotting Bart’s black hands] How many times have I told you to wash your hands after burning them crosses?
<Turns Bart’s hands over to reveal “white” palms. Taggart whips off Bart’s hood>
Bart: For my next impression, Jesse Owens!
Did they hack out some Mongo scenes on the DVD? When Bart defeats him all they show is the candygram in the bar. But I seen to remember Mongo diving for spanish dablooms (sp?) and also a draw against a cut out sheriff w/ a cannon. Does anybody else remember these “lost” Mongo scenes?
You’d do it for Randolph Scott!
(Crowd, reverently) Randolph Scott!
I’m surprised no one brought up The French Mistake
A classic dance number.
I have been known to break into an impromtu version of “I’m so tiiiiiiiiired” every once and a while.
“I’m not from Havana!”
“Bitte, Ba-by.”
Aw, Christ! Somebody’s gotta go back and git a shitload-a dimes!
Watch. Me. Faggots!
Rrruhrerruh!
“Put up your hands. Stick out yout tush.”
“Well, I’m parked over by the commissary. . .”
The “RrrehRrruh!” is a regular part of my terminology. I loved that!
“I’m so tiiiiiiiiiwwwed…dey’re always coming and going, going and coming…can’t you see I’m pooped?”
And it seems all the other favorite funny lines have already been quoted. 
xizor - I remember those other Mongo scenes, too. I rented the movie last night (I don’t know why I don’t own this one), and they were missing in my copy, too, and it was an old tape. There was another scene missing that I remember - after Bart and the Kid run from the gang in their KKK outfits, they come across a big Baptist ceremony where everyone else is also dressed in white robes. Does anyone else remember this?
I also was reminded of my favorie line, which I’m surprised hasn’t been mentioned here yet: “Schvartzes!”
Also the schoolmarm’s letter to the governor:
“We, the right GO-fearing citizens of Rock Ridge which to express our extreme displeasure with your choice of sheriff. Please remove him immediately.
The fact that you have sent him here just goes to prove that you are the leading asshole in the state.”
yes. he goes diving for dabloons in the well, and I also remember the cannon. They cut this out!!! bastards!
It’s spelled “dubloons,” I believe, and they cut that out? That would make my contribution to this thread a little less clear. I was referring to the scene you’re talking about, when they tried to get Mongo to go diving for Spanish dubloons, so that they could then cut off the air and kill him. When they bring up the subject of Spanish dubloons, Mongo’s response is, “Spa-nish bal-loons?” I swear to God, it’s funny if you hear him say it.
There’s a line spoken by the hangman outside Hedley’s office, when Hedley and Taggert are talking about Rock Ridge. The hangman (Boris) has an old, bald guy in a wheelchair, whom he kisses on the forehead, if I remember correctly. Hedley says “Oh, yes, the Dr. Gillispie killings. Carry on.” Is this line in reference to anything? Should that be particularly funny, or am I looking too hard?
Those scenes were not in the theatrical release and added back in for a TV cut to balance the stuff they had to cut. Suprisingly the fart scene is silenced in most cable TV showings.
I don’t know why, but the line that sticks in my mind is this. I’ll often shout it out during a discussion, particularly if it’s going in circles. gets me some looks, i can tell ya.
" Howard Johnson is right! "