'Aye aye, 'capn. I can make boiled dinner, fish chowder, corn chowder, salt pork chowder, pork and beans with rice—anything that can be fixed in a kettle.
'Aye aye, 'capn. I can make boiled dinner, fish chowder, corn chowder, salt pork chowder, pork and beans with rice—anything that can be fixed in a kettle.
Cap’n sir! There be a French ship in sight off t’port bow!
Sorry Cap. I be’s a pirate but I knows whot no means. She said she be sweet on hippo girl an’ ‘twas ol it took fer me.
Cap? A dilema we be havin’ here. The bountiful booty o’ the behemoth Galleon (whot may hold dubloons!) Or yon Frenchie whot may be holdin Champagne and potatoes fried fancy loik.
Dubloons can buy wine and potatoes, Champagne can gets dubloons and more in barter’n.
Me coarse still be 110 and nigh 'pon the o’er Spaniard. Whot be yer orders? Stay tight on coarse or to port 25 for the blue, white and red?
Boiled? BOILED?!
Ye stay ‘ways from me fresh catch ‘til ye’s learnt the ways o’ usin’ a fire in proper fashion.
boilt
Boiled be fine fer the briney stores from th’ larder.
boilt. Ye must learn ‘fore mutinous chatter be mumblet ‘board th’ fine Ted!
This ship been known t’ make landfall a toim r two. "at’s ‘ow’s the loiks o me come aboard, ‘twas on th’ Oile o’ Gilligan from whence comes me ‘n me oye. (an’ me prodijus 'mount o rum!)
Yarr, what be yer orders cap’n sir ma’am? The helpless frigate, or th’ french ship? Oi sooner be plundrin’ that Spanish ship whot we seen first, says me.
Or we scuttle that thar frigate so it be waitin’ for us when we come on back, cap’n.
Cap’n! From me perch in th’ crow’s nest, Oi can tell ya true - we got plenty o’ toime to get that thar fat spaniard a’fore the frenchies be upon us. Now that oi’ve picked me up a proper parrot (every pirate should ‘ave one) off th’ last ship, oi’s in the mood for a bit a’ treasure. Dubloons and the like oi says! Jooles and gold buys champagne a’plenty in port, oi says!
I think we be set with loot, men; keep on course for Port Royal. We fire only in defense, and not for gain.
Arr… maybe the cap’n be right.
Coarse set, same’s before toward the fat Spaniard, Port Royal be on t’other side of ‘er. She got a good frifgt comin’ ‘pon ‘er she does! and a sigh o’ relief an’ disbelief as we passes 'er by. 110 degrees.
Thankee, Pilot tunabreath.
Who be the lookout? Be it ye, Michael Ellis? Keep a sharp eye and report anythin’ worth reportin’.
No champagne? <sniff>
Did I mention how fetchingly adorable a Captive Pirate Princess looks when she get teary-eyed?
Hey! Who you be callin’ fat?
Oh! You said “Spaniard.” Must be meanin’ Jack, our little Spanish zombie pirate ninja monkey.
Whar’d ‘e go off t’ anyhow…?
stupid monkey
I be meanin’ that galleon “Atocha” we’s jus’ passed whot be sluggish and low it th’ water. With th’ Teds hold full we’re headin fer Port Royal. Keeps yer oyes pealt and be on the lookout fer land.
Poor Kallessa, I’ll find ye some o the bubbly wine, me mission it’l be.
rolls bottles of bubbly toward tunabreath
A cook’s gotta be good for somethin’ 'round these bits.
dozes off… slips out of his perch in the rigging
THUD!!
dusts self off as crewfolk suspiciously surround him
:eek:
A Monstre!
A right silly lookin’ one, though. Whot’s wit’ all the cookies?
Who ye be and what be ye doin’ in the riggin’ in me ship? P’raps yer the reason we not be gainin’ much speed. Explain yerself. Ye may find me to be generous t’day.
brushing cookie crumbs out of fur
Er… pardon me, lads, but it this… er, I mean… Arrr! Be this the famed pirate ship “The Black Flyin’ Dutch… er… mouse”?
feels sword point pressed against monstre rearquarters
turns around to face redshirt crewman and snaps sword in half
Yer should be careful wi’ that thing, ye could be puttin’ somebody’s eye out…
I be the Monstre, o’ course! BUT THERE ARE SOME WHO CALL ME… Bob.
Well… Napping. It be comfy up there!
By the way, lassie, I be thinkin’ I still owe ye a spankin’. 
Mons–er, Bob, ye can be head o’ security. Methinks ye’ll be top-notch.
Ye be on the Ted, now, Bob, so act accordingly. And no spankin’. I’ll buy ye a pint when we berth.