Cats are the most dangerous animals on Earth

You don’t believe me?

Check out these spawns of Satan.

Ask me about how my arm is still aching nearly a week after the tetanus shot I had to get thanks to a cat. Ask me how much my stomach looooooooves the Augementin I am on. Spawn of Satan indeed!

Plus they suck the breath out of babies.

Oh, yeah, those are the dreaded Pokemon cats that caused seizures in Japanese children.

Cats love me–they know I’m allergic to them.

I TOLD those dang kittens not to chew on strobe lights…

ha ha! That’s great!

That’s cute, Jojo! Heheheh… They’re unusual animals to be sure. I personally wouldn’t call them Spawn of Satan, however.

I’m so sorry to hear that you’re dealing with that, Cranky. Here’s a hug, hope it helps a little.
{{{{{{Cranky}}}}}}

I have just moved into the WeirdHouse. There are two cats here. I can not breathe, Zyrtec and Benadryl and Rhinocort aside.

Dear ** Jojo**,
Thank you so much for finding my kitty!!
I’ve missed her so much!!! If you’re ever in the area, I promise you a well-paid position in torturing multiple evil-souls with a pitchfork, or condemning the soul of your choice to a job in a cubicle for eternity. Thanks again, and much love!!!

Yours Truly,
Satan