DRY. purrrrrr…
Hastur, Ad Noctum really is a good guy with a healthy fondness for both cats and women and I will vouch that no disrespect toward either was meant.
pounces on lurker and shreads his drapes
ignores him and begins cleaning her claws with an aristocratic air
Oh Dave, you say it like it’s a bad thing. ::wraps arms around his waist and starts playing with his belt::
Gee, I tried to be nice and she's wrecking the place!
I didn’t even make the “How do you like cats? Slow roasted on a spit.” or “You like cats? Me too. Let’s trade recipes!” comments… maybe Ad Noctum has a point… (j/k, cat people)
One good point about a dog. Your idiot B-I-L starts yelling, it looks him in the eye and growls, he shuts up. raw intimidation is good at times.
HHHHIIISSS!!!
Mroooowww!
scratches Tripler’s leg
OW! Damn cats, where’s my dog?!? Cassie!! Go git 'em!
Tripler
My border collie can chase your cat, but she wouldn’t know what to do with it when she caught it.
Hastur? Mellow out. It’s a joke. It isn’t even a new joke. It’s funny though, and I say that as both a woman and a cat person.
Kat (should that be “Kipling’s Kat”? :p)–I really adore you, but why do you have to be in heat so damned often? (If you weren’t so much fun, I think I’d have you fixed.)
sigh…The things we do for love.
OK, here’s the one from MY humor file…I’ve got to clean it up from AOL’s markings, though:
About Cats & Dogs
What is a cat?
Cats do what they want.
They rarely listen to you.
They are totally unpredictable.
When you want to play, they want to be alone.
When you want to be alone, they want to play.
They expect you to cater to their every whim.
They are moody.
They leave hair everywhere.
They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.
What is a dog?
Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house.
They can hear a package of food opening half a block away, but they don’t hear you when you are in the same room.
They growl when they are not happy.
When you want to play, they want to play.
When you want to be alone, they want to play.
They are great at begging.
They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
They leave their toys everywhere.
They do disgusting things with their mouths and then try to give you a kiss.
Conclusion: They are little men in fur coats.
Add this to the “cats<–>women” list:
They’re both good eatin’.
And don’t call me Kat. My name is Kathryn.
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Medea’s Child *
“such a life, with such a wife, were strange!
But if you have a stomach, to’t i’ God’s name:
You shall have me assisting you in all.
But will you woo this wild-cat?”
–The Taming of the Shrew, Act 1, Scene ii
**
“You lie, in faith;
for you are call’d plain Kate,
And bonny Kate
and sometimes Kate the curst” 
–The Taming of the Shrew, Act 2, Scene i
I used to hate cats. I’m extremely allegic to them, they make me itch and have difficulty breathing. That said, when my wife and I bought our one bedroom condo, she ‘persuaded’ me to get a cat (no cat=no sex). So, the next day I went to the Humane Society and brought home Sasha. She evolved from a relatively unfriendly but cute grey kitten into a giant psychotic ball of grey fur with claws. She likes me, though. I think.
If that wasn’t enough, I dropped my wife off for her haircut one day. When I returned, she was holding this tiny VERY cute tiger striped kitty. Her mom had been killed, so I relented to my wife’s pleading ‘But she’s SOOOO cute!’ We was so small we had to bottle feed her. That’s how Natalia came into my house. Her nickname is FuckNut. There’s no real explanation for it, but it fits. She’s like Satan wrapped up in the cutest little package. Her sole purpose in life is to eat treats and torment Sasha to make her even more psychotic, if possible.
If that still wasn’t enough, I came into possesion of Outside Kitty. She was a stray that someone who lived here abandoned when they moved. I took her to the vet and had her checked up to make sure she was healthy. My original plan was to give her a temporary home until I could find a place for her. The problem is that Outside Kitty is pretty much…I guess ugly is the word (I was trying to put it delicately, but there’s no getting around it). Imagine Bill the Cat. But uglier. She’s got a really BIG chin. On a cat, this is simply weird looking. I quickly found out that my house was going to be her house. The interesting thing is that she is the most loveable of the freaks in my house (me included). 
So, there I was - one bedroom condo, one wife, and three cats.
Now I have - one bedroom condo, no wife, three cats, and oldscratchie.
No wonder I need meds…
Great minds must think alike! In speaking about Welfy:
Seriously, I think when looking at a cat as if looking at it for the first time, it is one of the most beautiful creatures in the world. And what I wouldn’t give to be able to make the cute sounds that they do, and to purr! 
sigh
Ad Noctum can meow like a cat
only because that’s the only way my cat will come when I’m about to feed him, I meow at him, and he comes and eats, no matter where he is in the house…
hmm… he’s a moron… (but so am I, seeing as I meow at my cat…)
I meow at my cats. I also bark back at my dog when she barks at me…just for the hell of it.