In one of his stand-up routines, comedian Steve Harvey said he will give autographs to kids but not to adults, just like Rosie O’Donnell. He didn’t say the part about RO’D, but it’s the same rationale – adults don’t need autographs and he’s willing to be pulled aside out of his own life for kids but not for adults. Seems perfectly reasonable to me, actually.
[QUOTE=Cisco]
Uhh, why the rolleyes? Did you think I really thought you had sex with Christopher Reeve? I apologize for trying to make a joke at the SDMB, where all but the most juvenile, slapstick, and recycled humor is frowned upon.
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That was directed mostly at myself for not seeing the double entendre in my OP.
[QUOTE=The Punkyova]
Re: Larry Bird, I don’t know his autograph policy, but he’s a nice guy. Many years ago, when he was a star player for the Celtics, they were playing in Las Vegas. My aunt and her friends happened to be there for their annual girls weekend. They were at a table in the bar, laughing at the way the ball players were being chased around by “available young ladies.” Several of these “a.y.l.” were bothering Larry Bird, and he asked if he could sit at my aunt’s table (in the only free seat), clearly just wanting some peace. They said sure, chatted with him, dealt him in to their bridge game and all of them ended up being quite friendly. After that, they timed their Vegas weekends around when the Celtics were playing there, and he always got them passes to the games. He sent shoes and Celtics stuff to their kids, and they all exchange Christmas cards. According to my aunt, he is a really nice, down to earth person who hates fakery and glamour.
(There was a book, I think by a Sports Illustrated reporter, chronicling Larry Bird’s final season with the Celtics. He talks in it about “The Golden Girls,” giving their names and the whole story.)
I have heard that Andy Griffith never, ever signs autographs, and this means you.
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Why were the Celtics playing in Vegas?
[QUOTE=beergeek279]
Well, in case you can’t read, most of the people who have been mentioned as not signing autographs aren’t seen as a bunch of pricks simply BECAUSE they’re upfront and honest at the beginning about signing autographs.
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In case you can’t read (neener neener), I was talking about the type of very rich celebrity who can’t sleep at night knowing that some yuk made a few bucks eBaying his autograph.
Since we have kinded of wandered off topic a bit, here is my only real autograph story.
When I was ten, my dad took me to a boxing match in Galveston. He was a big fan, so we got seats on an elevated stage that overlooked the ring. The event had two special guests: Muhammed Ali and George Foreman and they were both in my section.
I had never heard of Foreman at the time, but everyone knew Ali. He was probably still one of the most famous men in the world. Ali’s autograph policy was he would only sign autographs for kids.
At the time I was a young white kid from Alabama (I’m still white, but everything else has changed:)), so I was intimidated running the guantlet of large, scowling black body guards in bowties (whom I now assume to be members of the Nation of Islam).
So by the time I got to Ali, I’m a little shaken. He had not said a word to anyone in front of me or even smiled, but when I got to his seat, seeing my nervousness I suppose, Ali smiles, pinches my cheeks, signs the program, and gives me a hug.
Muhammed Ali has been my favorite public figure ever since.
Afterwards, my dad insisted that I go and get Foreman’s autograph. I didn’t really want to bother. Even though I wasn’t a sports fan, he told me that I would someday be very happy to have a boxing program with both Ali and Foreman’s signatures.
So, I went back to the back of the VIP stage area where Foreman was just standing around eating a fatty hamburger (the Foreman Grill was a decade away!). No crowds were formed around him, as he was at the time just a washed up, ex-champion. He was very friendly and shadow-boxed with me before signing my program.
A few years later, my dad got transfered to Houston and I wound up going to the same high school as Foreman’s kids (the Georges) and a close friend of mine was even his next door neighbor.
Of course, Foreman staged a historic comeback and then EVERYONE knew who he was.
My dad was right. I WOULD want a program with both men’s signature. I consider that program one of my most prized possessions.
A friend once asked what I thought it was worth. I could care less because I would NEVER sell it.
[QUOTE=Encinitas]
I attended the World Science Fiction Convention in Phoenix many years ago. They had a blood drive concurrent with the Con and everyone who donated was entered in a raffle to win a LP recording of Leonard Nimoy reading Heinlien’s The Green Hills of Earth. Amazingly enough I won, and several weeks later I received the album in the mail autographed by Heinlein!
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I’m a regular blood donor - will you leave me that album in your will? No one else in the world would treasure it as much as I would… 
-SCL, who has everything Heinlein every wrote on her library shelves and adores Leonard Nimoy.
Baseball player Kirby Puckett. It wasn’t that he hated it, it was the people making money off of him thing. There was a story in the Tribune years ago about how a man had chatted with Puckett while waiting for their flights at the airport. They chatted for hours and at the end he asked Puckett for an autograph to which Puckett replied, “I don’t do autographs.”.
[QUOTE=middleman]
My dad was right. I WOULD want a program with both men’s signature. I consider that program one of my most prized possessions.
A friend once asked what I thought it was worth. I could care less because I would NEVER sell it.
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Man, when Antiques Roadshow comes to your town, you’d better go!
I’ve read every post in this topic. Such interesting stories. There’s a lot out there I wouldn’t have though to be ungenerous wth their John Handcock. Maybe it’s just bad timing with some of them.
[QUOTE=The Punkyova]
Re: Larry Bird, … Many years ago, when he was a star player for the Celtics, they were playing in Las Vegas… After that, they timed their Vegas weekends around when the Celtics were playing there, and he always got them passes to the games.
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There is not now and was not during Larry Bird’s playing days a pro basketball team in Las Vegas. So I don’t know who the Celtics were playing when they played there.
[Larry Bird to his wife] “Yes honey, I got another away game in Vegas. No, it only SEEMS like all my away games in Vegas happen on long weekends in the off-season.” [\Larry Bird to his wife]
[QUOTE=Biffy the Elephant Shrew]
It’s not so much that he’s against giving out his autograph per se, it’s that he is fiercely protective of his personal space and can’t stand being approached by fans when he’s not “on.”
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Never asked any of them for autographs, but I ran into all the Crimson gang many a time back in the early 80s. Belew was recording his first couple of albums in Champaign-Urbana and KC hung out for a while. My buddy bought a bass head from the chick who played keyboards for AB in the whatever his bar band was at the time. Bears, Peas, Raisins, or somesuch.
Fripp was definitely the most - uh - stand offish of the crew. I think I might have said “Hey!” to him a time or two and received a nod in return. Levin and Bruford were pretty much regular guys, willing to chat but maintaining their distance if you know what I mean. But Belew was a different cat. Would be incredibly friendly and effusive to folks who just walked up to him in a bar.
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug]
In case you can’t read (neener neener), I was talking about the type of very rich celebrity who can’t sleep at night knowing that some yuk made a few bucks eBaying his autograph.
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Ohh, in that case, I apologize for my comments then!! :smack:
I just don’t like those guys because they do drag down the genuine autograph seeker (I like to think of autographs as a certain form of intellectual property). I know locally, whenever (as an example) Sidney Crosby does autographs, he insists on personalizing them so as to make resale virtually worthless, mostly because he has such huge commercial commitments in Canada where his autograph goes for $20 a pop.
Xisor said:
MadTheSwine mentioned this too. It’s my understanding that these were playoff games. As I said, this is all in the book. (I believe that the book was “Unfinished Business” by Jack McCallum, which fits my recollection of a book by a Sports Illustrated reporter who followed the team all year, but I can’t look inside anywhere I can see on the web so I can’t confirm that.)
Vincent Gallo signs autographs, but he signs them with his own semen, and only if you’re not black. And you have to pay him $500,000.
[QUOTE=xizor]
There is not now and was not during Larry Bird’s playing days a pro basketball team in Las Vegas. So I don’t know who the Celtics were playing when they played there.
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[OT]The Utah Jazz (back in the days of Malone and Stockton) sometimes played an occasional pre-season or regular season game in Vegas. I’m guessing that’s who the Celtics and Bird were playing.[/OT]
Madonna only signs autographs when she is working, and she won’t sign any nude photos of herself, ever since her daughter was born.
Approach her in a restaurant or while she is riding her bike and her husband will yell at you to “Feck off”. Her bodyguards are very protective of her as well, and not just in the regular way. If they think you are a stalker or any kind of sicko, they’ll tell you so to your face.
beergeek279
Gosh you are right. :smack: Why should these prima donnas lower themselves to the level of the people who buy their music, watch their TV show, go to their movies, attend their games (football, baseball, etc)? The money they get must come from somebody else right?
Which reminds me of the time I saw Dee Snyder of Twisted Sister on David Letterman. Snyder said he hated it when people would approach him for autographs especially when he was eating. He was really getting pissed just talking about it. Wow, it’s hard not to feel sorry for someone who is that “gifted” and who is doing so much for society having to put up with all that riff-raff. :rolleyes: Too bad he didn’t choose working at McDonald’s as a career path. That way no one would bother him for an autograph. (What an asshole !!!) :mad:
Okay, maybe it’s time for a few positive stories. During the 1975 Boston- Cincinnatti World Series (the famous one with the Carlton Fisk home run), Pete Rose and pitcher Don Gullett somehow got surrounded by a bunch of kids in Boston and signed autographs for 45 minutes. That was a great World Series and I think this story only adds to the spirit of those games. To think, those 2 players signed those autographs in “enemy” territory.
Another great story - Michael Jordan. I saw this on the evening news many years ago. When Mr Jordan was trying his hand at baseball, he was driving home from practice and was stopped at a traffic light. A kid in a car behind and to the left of him got out with a baseball, went to Michael Jordan who then signed it. (I don’t know who was videotaping this, but I know Michael Jordan was not aware of being videotaped). The light turned green and Mr Jordan took off in his Corvette and the kid had an autographed baseball.
It’s nice to hear those good stories about Bruce Campbell.
I’ve heard Carly Simon is quite pleasant to her fans also.
Perhaps Julia Roberts had a good idea when she bought a large chunk of land in New Mexico. In that way, she can have privacy, avoid fans or papparazzi and not look like an asshole (you know like Dee Snyder :mad: )
[QUOTE=The Chao Goes Mu]
Anyone know about Kevin Spacey? My friend who works for Lionsgate said he tried just chatting with him while Spacey was waiting for one of the execs and that he was rude and condescending. We both wanted to believe it was just a bad hemmorhoid flare-up or something.
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I met him a couple times back when he was doing The Iceman Cometh on Broadway. He seemed like a pretty nice guy, always stopped to sign & take photos with the (surprisingly) large group that would be waiting outside after the show. This was almost 8 years ago though, so I have no idea if he’s changed since then.
[QUOTE=beergeek279]
The best non-signer story from Pittsburgh is Mean Joe Greene, who wasn’t an autograph signer (by policy). Some kids came up to him and asked him for his signature, so in lieu of that, he took them onto the Steelers’ team bus and sat and talked to them for far longer than it would have taken for them to scribble his name on a little sheet of paper, which probably touched them far more than a little autograph ever could have.
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Their reaction? “Wow-thanks Mean Joe!”
I’ve heard that Tobey Maguire pretty much never signs autographs.
David Gilmour (Pink Floyd’s guitarist) crosses the street to avoid people he thinks might ask him for an autograph, but if asked, I believe he will sign.
Penn and Teller are renowned for never leaving the theater after a show until every fan has an autograph, handshake or picture. Another entertainer in that mold is Jay Leno; his niceness to fans is legendary. I read an anecdote in which Leno received a note after a show inviting him to the bar for a drink. Trouble was the note wasn’t signed and Leno had no idea who had written it; he felt terrible that he couldn’t take him/her/them up on the offer.
As for me, I’ve gotten autographs from several Doctor Who actors at conventions, a routine I’m not entirely comfortable with. The only signature I treasure is Andy Partridge’s, who signed my copy of Apple Venus for me.