Yeah, we tried it once. Turns out it would make excellent note taking PAPER.
Maybe next time we should try something softer, like sandpaper. I think 80 grit?
Are you guys out of your minds?! It’s one thing to have too soft a paper but the other extreme is worse, I think.
I once laughed because I saw that toilet paper was labeling itself as “2-ply”. I thought that in this day and age it was a given that toilet paper is 2-ply. I had no earthly idea it came in 1-ply. Then I bought scotts…
You guys have it all wrong. Scott may as well be called “Scrape,” and Cottonelle still leaves the miniscule “tp doobies” on my ass crack. Quilted Northern is the BEST! Anything else is for non-serious poopers.
So we don’t get our hands dirty! I use enough paper, usually a fistful, to create a barrier between myself and the nether regions. I do, indeed, look after each swipe. I try to use thin toilet paper to combat this. I prefer Harris Teeter generic brand 1000 sheet rolls. Probably very similar to Scotts.
I have never folded and dabbed. I always wad and swipe.
When I go over to someone else’s house and they have thick, pillowy paper, I get very tense, because the same yank of the roll will produce a wad three times as big. Also, like the OP, I want to feel I’ve scraped my ass clean, and Charmin isn’t going to get that done. I’m the same way with tissues, I prefer a more abrasive touch on my nose to make sure all the dripping snot is off, and I like abrasive loofahs and grainy bath bars when bathing.
When I’m using something aloey, I feel like it’s coating me and leaving residue, rather than removing residue. Even now, I shudder to think about it.
Well, obviously, I’m not CanvasShoes, but I’ll answer, since I’m of the female persuasion. I’ll keep it clean, though. Girls need to wipe when they go both #1 and #2. Hence the need for more paper.
Guys just “shake it off” when they go #1. No need to wipe. Got it?
Imagine if you peed, and your entire ballsack and choda area got wet, with a trickle down to your asshole. Graphic enough? Now imagine that area consisting of folds of skin with pubic hair to hold moisture.
A little known fact to half the population.
Many Yahrin ago, I ran a small movie theatre. We had twin-roll TP holders. Without fail, after the first show went in, I would have to send the staff in to reload—one roll would be gone, and just a stub would be left of number two. The stub rolls would go to the men’s room. After a while I would have 30 gallon bags of stub rolls. It would take the men longer to go through one 100 sheet stub than the woman to use two 750 sheetrolls
The men could hit the target most of the time. Don’t get me started about hoverers…
Plenty graphic, but still doesn’t answer my question. I’ve known women to use half a roll in one, ahem, sitting. The cleanup you speak of shouldn’t require more paper than you use to wipe your backside. Maybe 10 squares, twice. On a roll of 136, you should get more than 6 sittings.
Here’s the thing. It’s only 136 sheets, but with that Ultra, you only need to use like 2 squares in a single wipe. It’s only barely less efficient than regular stuff.
Don’t make a great big ball out of it. It doesn’t reach as far as you require, and it is more wasteful.
Make sure the rest of your household understands this, too.
This reminds me of a mini-rantlet. Women are always complaining that men have such bad aim, as if we’re all morons or something. “Idiot men always pee on the floor, why can’t they just aim? Women are much neater” is something I always hear. Easy for women to say, as they don’t have the same equipment, and don’t seem to understand that dickies don’t exactly come with telescope sights.
My ex-girlfriend made this complaint all the time. She said I was a slob because I got maybe one dribble on the floor. Then one night she was feeling both frisky and drunk, and insisted on “helping” me to pee, by holding my meat while I stood in front of the toilet. The accuracy of her aim? Let’s just say that I made her clean the ceiling.
I wipe my backside and vagina separately, with distinct wads of toilet paper (sometimes if my wad is particular big, I’ll fold between swipes). Sometimes the backside takes 2-3 tries to get everything off. Perhaps an issue of technique?
I just did some research. One swipe for pee with a moderate size wad was 17 sheets of thin industrial toilet paper. I imagine the equivalent in Charmin is 7-9 sheets.
To the men out there… Are we on the same page about skid marks? Proper wiping leaves absolutely nothing behind to stain? That’s the operating premise for me.
Charmin is soft, yes, but I agree that you end up changing the roll too often and it is WAY too expensive. In an act of corporate defiance (I work for the company that makes Charmin) a few years ago, I purchased a whole freaking skid of Scott toilet paper at one of those warehouse clubs. I still marvel at the great deal I got. After the crane loaded it into the van, I drove home thinking how happy Mr. Pundit the Frugal would be about my most excellent deal.
Though he slipped a disk unloading it, he did admit it was a great deal. Then he opened up a roll and frowned. “It’s single ply.” Huh? Actually I hadn’t noticed that. So, I took a few sheets, folded it into two and said, “Voila! 2-ply! Besides, it’s used to wipe your ASS; how bad could it be?”
It was bad. Even the kids complained. After a few months, Mr. Pundit finally put his foot down and demanded softer toilet paper, “the kind that doesn’t have twigs still embedded in it.”
So I’ve reluctantly gone back to using Charmin or Cottonelle with one modification: I’ll only buy double rolls now and they have to be on sale. If I can’t find any on sale, it’s back to the Scott. In 15 years when we deplete our Scott inventory, I don’t know what we’re going to do.
When was the last time you purchased some? It’s WAAAAAAYYY softer than Charmin. Positively comfy! It is the softest paper out there, as far as I’m concerned.
Just to be clear, I meant that anal paper should be an equivelant amount as vaginal, not be reused as such.
One thing I have about the big rolls is that they don’t fit on the dispenser. They get all jammed in there and when you try to unroll some, it rips and you get hamster cage stuff all over the floor. What kind of giant freak dispensers do people have that they can buy the fat rolls?
I’m pretty sure that the paper we had before the Charmin was Scotts, that’s why we ran out, a roll would last so freaking long, that I only had to buy it every other trip or so, and I third it’s softness. My son Jock used the ‘like wiping with a blanket’ comment when we were talking about this last night. Oh and I’m used to my wife using a lot of paper, however she never uses the bathroom I mentioned in the OP. She calls it “The Boys” bathroom, as we have our own off the bedroom, I use both depending on where I am when the urge hits. My wife is the lone female in a house of three boys and myself.
You want graphic? Put your lunch down before you read this…
Let’s consider periods for a sec. Happens once every 28 days, generally lasts about 5 to 7 days during that time. A good amount of guys probably don’t know that a a period is actually the uterus shedding its lining (which would be used to sustain a baby if she were pregnant; thus, not pregnant, don’t need it).
So, you sit down to take a piss, and not only piss comes out, but a gout of slimy blood and clots that look like little chicken livers. Because of a woman’s anatomy, it also tends to trickle down her ass crack, leaving not only a bloody coochie but a bloody ass as well. And also, between the times that she goes to the washroom, the blood that collects in her sanitary pad also gets matted into her pubic hair. Gotta get that out too.
As well, the cramps that go along with periods can also induce diarrhea. So here you are stuck with bloody, pissy, slimy, caked-haired, shitty genitals and ass.
Don’t worry, dude. It ain’t like that for all of us.
I’ve never experienced anything that disgusting and I’m s 30-year-old female. I just use a tampon. Then I pull it out and flush it. A simple wipe usually does the trick for any excess. No need for any big production.
My bf and I often have sex during “that time of the month,” and I wouldn’t be able to do that if it was what Amazon described. Sorry about your luck, gal.
