If I have said it once, I have said it a hundred times - never trust a seagull! They are like filthy sailors, flying from port to port, romancing all of the birds of questionable morals.
When will the penguins learn?
bolding mine.
I particularly liked this part…
So, not exactly a promiscuous seagull, but rather one with a penchant for the really old penguins.
How do they know it wasn’t an infected human that suffers from penguin lust? :dubious:
I’ll bet it’s really difficult to get a condom on a seagull… :dubious:
I dunno…I’ll bet if you could stand on the wings and have both hands free…
INFIDEL!
Throw them out of the community.
Damn you! I can’t stop laughing! My side aches! OWWW 
I guess he had a PILF fetish.
Bloom County fan?
Seagulls are the harlots of the sky, I tells ya.
This reminds me of a very old joke about an avian STD that is “untweetable.”
Well, you gotta die of something…
How could they tell if a human was maquerading in a penguin colony? He was wearing a tux and carrying a tray.
<rimshot>
Opus Beware!
Those penguins need to realize that they are strong, independent penguins. They don’t need any seagulls romancing them in order to feel complete.
Oh sure. So the only valid relationship is between two penguins? Don’t other interspecies have equal rights to protection and recognition? What about alternate seagulls? Well??
You don’t think that a romance between a harmless flightless tuxedo wearing bird and port-to-port flying mine-mine-mine! harlot is natural?
What’s next, you fiend? Ostriches and Kiwi’s?
I blame the republicans. If they weren’t teaching water fowl abstinance only, this wouldnt have happened.
Water-fowl abstinence won’t work.
Deep in the heart of the penguin colonies are pit couches, lava lamps, bean bag chairs and ecstacy for everyone. Pulsating music blares while the strobe light adds an aura of seductivity. Kama Sutra Penguin prints are on the walls to encourage variations. On one wall, two inches from the bottom, there are holes in the rock that go through to the other side. One shocked National Geographic researcher discovered with infrared goggles these to be Glory Holes.
It has been noted that on a phallous shaped rock the female penguins ( possibly lesbian, it’s hard to tell as they are all dressed to the nine’s.) take turns on it pleasuring themselves.
Flippers and big feet are seen flapping everywhere from the oddest positions. The largest problem remains that after sex, the penguins cannot get up easily from the shag carpeting, eventually they just swap partners with whomever else is in a similar predicament, until they hump their way over to a ice floe and can get back on their webbed feet. Those penguins that are too old or deemed by the colony as too nerdy to copulate are responsible for supplying a steady stream of fish for the fornicators.
Penguin orgies are not for the squeamish.
A sampling of Penguin Porn. I never saw this on The Mutual of Omaha!
It’s called psittacosis, and yes, it’s a form of the clap. Fun fact: you can get it (rather innocently) from your pet parrot!
Try explaining that to your next sexual partner!
Anybody seen Opus lately?.. :eek: