So you’ve been arrested for murder. You may or may not have committed the crime. You have the option to choose any fictional lawyer to defend you. Who would you choose?
I considered Eugene Young from The Practice. He’s passionate, serious, and forceful, and can Plan B (accuse someone else on the stand to create doubt) in a very convincing manner.
Then there are Perry Mason and Ben Matlock, whose share the distinction of only having lost one case each in their respective careers, and routinely get the real killer to confess on the stand. The problem here is, what if I’m guilty? Or what if the real killer doesn’t take the stand to be tricked into confessing? Eugene is just as passionate about defending the guilty as the innocent, and can make innocent witnesses look guilty. Nah, Mason and Matlock are out.
How about Victor Sifuenes or Michael Kuzak LA Law? Nah, too involved in office politics and jumping into and out of bed with the same women. They’d be too distracted.
The bald guy from Murder One? He had prepared a large bribe for an appeals court judge just in case he lost, a big plus in my book. I’ll keep him on backup.
John Cage looks good, and his goofy charm might throw off the jury, but he doesn’t have enough murder trial experience.
I think I’ll have to go with Douglas Wambaugh (Picket Fences). His clients are pretty much always guilty, and he almost always gets them off. He managed to get a drug dealer who videotaped himself machine gunning two cops aquitted on self-defense, and didn’t hesitate to attack the credibility of the Pope as a witness. This is the man I want defending me, especially if I’m guilty. But I’ll keep Young as a backup.
Daniel Benzali’s defense attorney character on NYPD Blue, James Sinclair, is apparently unbeatable, even better than his Murder One character. I’d take him, Eugene Young, or the generic “good lawyer” character who always beats Troy McClure on the Simpsons.
If innocent and in the United States, Perry Mason. If guilty or in England, Horace Rumpole. If guilty and in the United States, Perry Mason assisted by Horace Rumpole. Actually, that sounds like the best option if I get to listen in on the discussions between the two!
I rarely watch legal dramas on TV, so I have to take my pick from a book:
Master Li Kao from Barry Hughart’s Master Li and Number 10 Ox series. He’s old, crafty, and has a slight flaw in his character. I don’t know if he’s precisely a lawyer, but he seems to have a good knowledge of the law and how to bend it in half without breaking it.
For me, it has to be Perry Mason. (I watched the series when I was young, and the theme tune is riveting!)
That assumes I’m innocent.
If I’m guilty, I want Charisma Carpenter. (Actually I want Charisma whatever my status. But I digress.)
See, I’m honest, so I’ll probably plead guilty. Which means my lawyer won’t have much to do. But it would still be nice to have Charisma on my side…
For me, it has to be Perry Mason. (I watched the series when I was young, and the theme tune is riveting!)
Of course, that assumes I’m innocent.
If I’m guilty, I want Charisma Carpenter. (Actually I want Charisma whatever my status. But I digress.)
See, I’m honest, so I’ll probably plead guilty. Which means my lawyer won’t have much to do. But it would still be nice to have Charisma by my side…
Oh, I should mention that I especially admire Atticus Finch* for his courage and morals. But he wasn’t successful in stopping the railroading, so Perry it is.
*it’s another thread, but do you remember in the film when Atticus gets up after the verdict and slowly walks out the court?
All the blacks in town are sitting in the balcony. As Atticus passes beneath they all silently rise, and the Reverend says to Atticus’ daughter “Stand up little miss. Your father is passing.”
That combination of respect and courage in the face of tragedy makes me cry every time I watch it.
But I digress.)