I have a friend whom I dread getting e-mail from. She rarely writes anything about herself, what she’s been up to, whatever. All she does is forward, forward, forward the same jokes and glurge over and over. And it stuns me that she can send some of the raunchiest jokes, cartoons, and photos I’ve ever seen, then turn around and send some glurge about how the country has gone to hell since they took the Bible out of the classroom and started showing filth on TV. “Our children have no morals! Warning: ADULT!!” It just blows my mind that she doesn’t seem to find this somehow incongruous or contradictory.
What’s got me irked at the moment is this stupid joke that she’s sent again. It’s not exactly glurge, but it’s just as annoying:
I have half a mind to send her my own version of this joke:
There’s a little old Christian lady living next door to an atheist. Every morning the lady comes out onto her front porch and shouts “Praise the Lord!”.
Sometimes the atheist smiles and waves to her, but mostly he minds his own business. He realizes this is a free country and doesn’t want to start anything.
She does this every morning with the same result. As time goes on the lady runs into financial difficulties and has trouble buying food. She goes out onto the porch and asks God for help with groceries, then says “Praise the Lord”. The atheist felt bad for the poor lady because he knew her no-good daughter and useless son-in-law wouldn’t help her, so he went to the store and picked up a few staples.
The next morning she goes out onto the porch and there’s the atheist with the groceries she’s asked for, of course she says “Praise the Lord”.
The atheist says, “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I heard you needed some help with groceries… I hope you don’t think I’m being too forward.”
The lady looks at him and smiles, she shouts “Praise the Lord! Would you come in and have a cup of tea with me?” Again, the atheist felt bad for the lonely old lady, so he had some tea and cookies with her, looked at photos of the grandchild she never gets to see, and helped her clean up. He was a little annoyed at first that she seemed to begin every sentence with “Praise the Lord!” but he realized that was just the way she was and ignored it. Before he left, he promised to check in on her again in a couple days. She gave him a hug and said, “Praise the Lord!! Thank you!” The end.
Ok, it’s not as “funny” as the original, but it’s truer to life, in my experience. But do you think I can convince my friend of that? Based on the kind of glurge she usually sends me, I doubt it. Should I send this to her?
And it seriously boggles my mind that, moments after sending the prior e-mail, I receive this little gem from the same person:
Ha ha! I mean, huh? I mean… huh.